- Screech: My Dad let me back the car out of the garage once. Then he got mad at me.
- Mr. Tuttle: Well, Screech, your father was probably nervous.
- Screech: Well, he had a right to be. I forgot to open the garage door.
- Lisa: I hope he has dork insurance.
- Mr. Belding: Morning, Morris.
- Zack: [Still thinking about Kelly] Morning, my love.
- [Both exchange uncomfortable looks]
- Mr. Tuttle: [Teaching Driver's Ed class] Now, Jessie, what's the speed limit on most freeways? You know this one, you know this one, you know this one.
- Jessie: 55 miles per hour.
- Mr. Tuttle: Excellent! I wish you were my child. Now, can you pass someone over a double yellow line? Kelly.
- Kelly: No, you can't.
- Mr. Tuttle: This is why I went into teaching! Okay, Lisa, listen up. Why do you put your left arm straight out the window?
- Lisa: That's easy: to dry your nails.
- Mr. Tuttle: [Teaching Driver's Ed class] Zack, what is the correct driving position?
- Zack: Well, sir, for me, it's one hand on the wheel, and one arm around Kelly.
- Kelly: Zack!
- Slater: Mr. Tuttle, sir, the correct driving position is the left hand at ten o'clock and the right hand at two o'clock. That way, you'll have full control of your car.
- Mr. Tuttle: Mr. Slater, my brain salutes you!
- Zack: [to Slater] Teacher's pet.
- Mr. Tuttle: But you're the one who belongs on a leash, Morris.
- Mr. Tuttle: Miss Turtle, what's the first thing we do when we get behind the wheel?
- Lisa: Adjust the mirrors.
- Mr. Tuttle: Correct! And for what purpose?
- Lisa: To check my make-up.
- Mr. Tuttle: Miss Turtle, I suggest you either study harder, or start practicing how to say: "Taxi!"
- Male Student #1: Hi, Kelly.
- Zachary 'Zack' Morris: [Lifts Kelly's hand and shows ring] Hey, see the ring?
- Male Student #2: Hi, Kelly.
- Zachary 'Zack' Morris: [Lifts Kelly's hand and shows ring] *See* the *ring*?
- Kelly Kapowski: Zack, we are not going steady. This is just a friendship ring.
- Female Student: Hi, Zackie.
- Kelly Kapowski: [Lifts her hand and shows ring] *See* the *ring*?
- Zack: Why's everybody so down?
- Jessie Spano: None of us have enough money for a car.
- Zack: Well, I'm gonna drive my father's Porsche when I turn 16.
- Lisa: Ha! Slip into your PJs, baby, 'cause you're dreamin'.
- Slater: Hey, guys, I've got some great news!
- Zack: Your last baby tooth fell out!
- Slater: No, I just bought a car!
- [Zacks spits out his drink in horror]
- Kelly: Can we see it?
- Slater: Well, sure, come on over to the house.
- [the others gather their things and leave]
- Zack: You know, Slater, if I hadn't gotten that ring for Kelly, I could've bought a car.
- Slater: Batteries or wind up?
- Slater: [Entering garage] I just couldn't believe it when I saw it on the lot. It's exactly the car I wanted.
- [Turns lights on, revealing old, beaten up car]
- Slater: Well? What do you think?
- Lisa: Uh, it's, uh... nice. Really nice... really.
- [Turns to Jessie]
- Jessie: Yeah... it's, it's, uh... all Lisa said. Gosh, it's got a licence play holder too.
- [Licence plate holder falls off]
- Mr. Belding: Zack, you flunk Driver's Ed. You'll make it up next year. Now pack up your stuff and let's go.
- Mr. Belding: [Turns to Mr. Tuttle] And that, Mr. Tuttle, is how you principal.
- [Leaves the room]
- Mr. Tuttle: [Imitating Belding] "And that, Mr. Tuttle, is how you principal."
- Mr. Belding: I told you not to use that stupid car, but you're always the rebel, aren't you?
- Mr. Tuttle: Oh, sure, blame Tuttle. Forget that he has feelings. Forget that he was next in line to be principal, had the color scheme for this office all picked out. Your taste is so tacky.
- Mr. Belding: [Under his breath, walking to the door] So is your personality.
- [Opens the door]
- Mr. Belding: If you'll excuse me, the school has a problem, and the principal who was hired will take over.
- Mr. Tuttle: Whatever you say, "Mr. Balding."