- Wanda Li: [ghostly, as Arnold is about to eat Ralphie's mallowblaster] Arrrnollllllld...
- Arnold Perlstein: Huh? I've heard my stomach growl before, but - talk?
- Wanda Li: Arrrrrrrnollllllld - are *you* about to eat Ralphie's mallowblasterrrr?
- Arnold Perlstein: Uh, no... I-I mean, yes! Eeeee! Wait a second! Who *is* this?
- Wanda Li: This is your conscience, Arnold. You know you musn't eat Ralphie's mallowblaster. Besides, you're not even hungry.
- Arnold Perlstein: Not hungry? But I could eat a...
- Wanda Li: You just *think* you're hungry, but what you *really* are is - thirsty.
- Arnold Perlstein: I am?
- Wanda Li: Trust me, you are. Now there's a nice bottle of seltzer in Wanda's lunchbag. *That's* what you *really* want.
- Arnold Perlstein: [hesitantly reaching for the seltzer] Well - OK, I-I guess. Hey, how come it's OK to drink Wanda's seltzer, but it's *not* OK to eat Ralphie's mallowblaster?
- Wanda Li: Because Wanda is a far kinder, more generous human being than Ralphie when it comes to sharing.
- Arnold Perlstein: Then how come when *she* has a mallowblaster, she hogs it all to herself?
- Wanda Li: Look, I'm your conscience, all right? Just do what I say and drink the seltzer. Now!
- Arnold Perlstein: [to Liz] Time me.
- [drinks the seltzer]
- Keesha Franklin: Poor Arnold, looks like he's got a hole in his stomach.
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Not a hole, Keesha, a valve. The doorway to his small intestine!
- Carlos Ramon: [after the bus lands in Arnold's stomach] Now that's what I call a belly flop.
- [the others laugh]
- Ralphie Tennelli: Man, if the small intestine was Scuba World, the large intestine must be *Smell* World!
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: In just a few moments, we'll be landing in Arnold's stomach. Thank you for flying Digestion Airways.
- Wanda Li: What are we gonna do, what are we gonna do, what are we gonna do?
- Phoebe Terese: Wanda, what are we gonna do?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Class, welcome to the esophagus!
- Carlos Ramon: The asparagus?
- Dorothy Ann: [chuckles] No Carlos, the esophagus. It's where your food goes after you swallow.
- Dorothy Ann: Hey, why hasn't the gum been digested?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: A few things are too tough to be broken up and dissolved.
- Phoebe Terese: Like - school buses, right?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: There's only one way to find out.
- Phoebe Terese: At my old school, we were never allowed to be digested.
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Never say "never", Pheobe.
- Dorothy Ann: [nervously] But according to my research, after chewing comes swallowing!
- Dorothy Ann: I don't get it. *I* thought we were supposed to answer the question about what happens to the food we eat.
- Tim Jamal: Yeah, where *are* we going?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Not far class, not far at all. Here we gooooo!
- Arnold: Ms. Frizzle, no matter what, I'll never miss another field trip. Never-ever, ever, *ever*!
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Wonderful, Arnold.
- Arnold: Starting - right after the next one.
- Arnold: Boy, it's - kind of empty in here. I wonder where they went? Well, wherever they are, they don't have me to slow 'em down anymore.
- Dorothy Ann: Here at United Digestion, we believe in breaking things down. We start with the raw material of the food, put it in the mouth, and use the finest teeth in the world to tear, grind, and crush it into pieces small enough to swallow. Then the food gets pushed down the esophagus line and into Stomach Central, where we add acids, and other chemicals to break the food down, and dissolve it into a liquid. And that's only *half* of what we do here at United Digestion.
- Arnold: Olive eating, now that's a school record I could go for.
- [Liz literally throws the all school record book at Arnold and he opens up to a page on olive eating]
- Arnold: The all school record book? "Olive eating-978"?
- [he looks at the Olive jar and finds one Olive in it]
- Arnold: [as he looks through the book] Ok, it doesn't have to be olives. There have to be other records in here waiting to be broken!
- Wanda Li: Man, when it comes to digestion, Arnold *doesn't* mess around.
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: You haven't seen anything yet.
- Ralphie Tennelli: [nervously] You mean there's more?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Mm-hmm.
- Wanda Li: [cheering] All right, Arnold!
- Dorothy Ann: Here at United Digestion, what we digest, we deliver. as the villi in the small intestine soak up the nutrients in the food, the nutrients are transferred into the bloodstream. And the bloodstream delivers the nutrients to *all* parts of the body. Because here at United Digestion, we believe in turning food...
- [eats the tip of a carrot]
- Dorothy Ann: into fuel.
- Phoebe Terese: You know what, Ms. Frizzle? At my old school, we turned back in this kind of weather.
- Dorothy Ann: So the first thing that happens to the food when it gets digested, is the teeth cut and grind it into smaller pieces.
- Phoebe Terese: [the Friz settles back after turning on the auto system] Ms. Frizzle, wha - what're you doing?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Time to let Arnold's digestive system do the driving.
- Wanda Li: Cool!
- [going to the rear window]
- Wanda Li: It's like we're driving through a tunnel, but the tunnel's driving us!
- Carlos Ramon: Hey Arnold, how about a push?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: [after Wanda enters the large intestine while balancing on Arnold's swallowed gum, the others surround the valve to the large intestine] Ah, she went into the *large* intestine.
- Tim Jamal: The large intestine? You mean there's more?
- Keesha Franklin: [as the bus gets on its way to rescuing Wanda] The further we go, the drier it gets.
- Tim Jamal: It looks like the walls are sucking up all the water.
- Phoebe Terese: [after Carlos rescues Wanda from further bungee jumping on Arnold's swallowed gum down his large intestine] All right, Carlos, you saved her!
- Wanda Li: Saved me? I was having a *blast*! Arnold's digestive system is the wildest, scariest, scream-your-lungs-out ride in the world!
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: And it's not over yet.
- Arnold Perlstein: [to Liz, after burping the bus out, thanks to drinking Wanda's seltzer] Did I break the seltzer chunking record?
- [Liz shakes her head]
- Arnold Perlstein: I'll never break a record. I'll never win anything. I'll never even get to eat lunch.
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: [appearing back in the classroom with the rest of the class, about to present Arnold's lunch] Did someone say "lunch"?
- Wanda Li: [clearing her throat, then presenting Arnold with a sandwich trophy] Congratulations, Arnold.
- Arnold Perlstein: Huh?
- Wanda Li: You just broke the record for being the best field trip ever!
- Arnold Perlstein: Wha - what?
- Wanda Li: And giving me the ride of my dreams!
- Arnold Perlstein: You mean - *I* was the field trip?
- [the rest of the class nods]
- Wanda Li: Yep.
- Arnold Perlstein: But where exactly did you go?
- [his stomach growls]
- Arnold Perlstein: You went - inside?
- [the rest of the class laughs]
- [the class is heading down the esophagus]
- Keesha Franklin: I wonder if this is what it feels like to get squeezed out of a tube of toothpaste!
- Tim Jamal: Yeah, but I get the feeling we're not gonna end up on Arnold's toothbrush.
- Ralphie Tennelli: Check out the pink cliffs of Arnold!
- Tim Jamal: [shows Ralphie a diagram he sketched] Ralphie, that's his stomach wall.
- Arnold Perlstein: [as he pops an olive into his mouth] Nothing like Cheezie Weezies with a green olive chaser!
- Ralphie Tennelli: I get it! The bloodstream is kind of like a - pizza delivery service, except it delivers energy!
- Carlos Ramon: Speaking of energy, where's Wanda?