Muppet Babies (TV Series)
Transcontinental Whoo-Whoo (1991)
Greg Berg: Fozzie, Scooter
Quotes
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[the kids hear strange noises coming from the hallway]
Gonzo : Maybe it's a two-headed watermelon monster.
Rowlf : With tentacles.
Scooter : Installing a satellite dish.
[Bean pictures a giant spider]
Bean Bunny : Gosh, really?
Fozzie : Uh-uh. It's Uncle Statler, Uncle Waldorf, and Nanny making "Whoo whoo, chug chug, ding ding" noises.
Piggy : That's the silliest thing I...
[Statler and Waldorf enter, wearing train conductor hats, and trip down the stairs, dropping their boxes]
Piggy : Ever heard.
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Fozzie : [bumps into a bookshelf] Simon says "Ow."
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Statler : Ha ha. Sacramento's a pretty fancy place, eh, kids?
Fozzie : Yeah. Almost as nice as Nanny's room.
Piggy : Fozzie, this is Nanny's room.
Fozzie : Uh-uh. Uncle Statler said this is Sack-of-potato. See?
[Fozzie and Piggy now see the old western buildings of Sacramento]
Piggy : Oh.
Fozzie : Boy, some people think they know everything.
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Statler : Kermit, you and Fozzie start laying tracks. And, Piggy, you and Rowlf get the train ready.
[Kermit starts carrying the heavy rail, but notices Fozzie isn't helping]
Kermit : What's the matter, Fozzie?
Fozzie : Uncle Statler didn't say "Simon says."
Kermit : Oh, boy. Simon says let's go.
Fozzie : Okay.
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Kermit : Which way we going, Uncle Statler?
Statler : That way, son. East.
[the kids look to their left and see Nanny's chair]
Fozzie : That doesn't look so bad.
Piggy : [wiping her face] Yeah. All we have to do is move some of that furniture.
Statler : Furniture? Look again, girl. Why, those are the High Sierras, toughest mountain range in the world.
Piggy : Oh, I knew that.
[the kids now see the High Sierras and are amazed]
Fozzie : Boy, Nanny's not going to be happy about this. She really liked that chair.
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Kermit : [while tunneling through the mountain] Whew! Going through this mountain... is even harder than going over it.
[lifts a load of dirt]
Kermit : Here, Rowlf.
Rowlf : [takes the load from Kermit] Ugh, that's for sure. Here, Piggy.
Piggy : [takes the load from Rowlf] Ugh, whew! I'll say. Here, Fozzie.
[Fozzie doesn't take the dirt and Piggy falls over]
Piggy : Ooooh!
Fozzie : You didn't say "Simon says."
[laughs]
Piggy : Can you believe this?
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Rowlf : Howdy, partner.
Bean Bunny : Howdy-do to you, bud.
[pulls out a barrel]
Bean Bunny : Here's that barrel of peanut butter you ordered.
[an angry Piggy comes out of the tunnel]
Piggy : Oooh!
Bean Bunny : Gosh, what happened to her?
[Fozzie appears]
Fozzie : Simon says "Hi". Ha ha ha ha ha!
Rowlf : That answer your question?
Bean Bunny : Uh-huh. Well, gotta get going. Got a tub of jelly to deliver to Uncle Waldorf. Say, uh, you wouldn't know how to get to St. Louis, would you?
Statler : Sure would. That-a-way, about 2,000 miles.
Bean Bunny : Two thousand...? Uh, heh heh. Lucky me. See you around Christmas, I guess.
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Scooter : Which way do we go now, Uncle Waldorf?
Waldorf : Well, hard to tell, son. Map stops right about here.
Skeeter : Um, maybe we should ask this guy.
[Animal appears before Waldorf's group as an Indian chief]
Skeeter : He looks like he knows his way around.
Waldorf : I'll bet he does, too. Indians were the first real Americans, you know. This land belonged to them before anyone else.
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Scooter : [to Gonzo] Just ask him the shortest way to the kitchen, would ya? I'm starved.
Animal : Ooh, me show way! Ya-ya-ya-ya-ya-ya!
[Animal rides off on his horse with the group following him, then stops]
Animal : That shortest way.
[everyone looks on in shock as they see a huge canyon]
Skeeter : Gee, maybe we should ask him for the second shortest way.
Gonzo : Right. Uh, Mr. Chief, sir.
[Animal has disappeared]
Gonzo : Oh, boy.
Skeeter : He's gone.
Waldorf : That's okay. We'll do what the original railroad men did.
Gonzo : Order a pizza?
Waldorf : Nope. Build a bridge.
Gonzo : Oh, that was gonna be my next guess.
