Photos
Quotes
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Emma Pillsbury : If we had to rank crush-worthy teachers at this school, you'd be number one with a bullet.
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Will Schuester : [trying to convey through song how inappropriate her feelings for him are] So, Rachel, do you think you understood the message I was trying to get across with that ballad?
Rachel Berry : Yes. It means I'm very young and it's hard for you to stand close to me.
Will Schuester : [exasperated sigh] Um, no. Um... Emma, would you mind helping me out here? Um, was that the message that you got?
Emma Pillsbury : [just as taken and doe-eyed as Rachel] You're a very good performer.
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Will Schuester : It's happening again. It always starts with a novelty gift.
Emma Pillsbury : I mean, you can't blame her, Will. I mean, if we were going to rank crush-worthy teachers at this school, you'd be number one with a bullet.
[as she realizes what she said, he turns and gives her a strange look]
Emma Pillsbury : Uh... well, I... when did... when did this start with Rachel?
Will Schuester : We sang a duet in Glee Club. "Endless Love."
Emma Pillsbury : Okay, in hindsight, that was probably a mistake.
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Will Schuester : [telling Emma of an old schoolgirl crush] It was the world's hottest pepper. She had it shipped from Sinaloa, Mexico.
Emma Pillsbury : Oh, no. Oh, gosh, what happened?
Will Schuester : Well, the ambulance arrived just in time. The pepper burned holes in her esophagus, and she was in a medically induced coma for three days. That's why I can't just tell Rachel to back off. These girls are too fragile.
Emma Pillsbury : Wow. Okay. How about this? Why don't you take your own advice? Right? Do what you told the kid to do. If you're... if you're feeling awkward telling Rachel how you feel, then why don't you, um, you know, sing it to her? Let her down gently. And don't wear that tie.
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Will Schuester : I can't handle going through this again.
Emma Pillsbury : Sorry, going through, um... going through what again?
Will Schuester : Have I ever told you about... Suzy Pepper?
[Emma shakes her head; cut to Schue teaching in flashback]
Will Schuester : So the alpacas start there and, uh, travel down towards Guadalajara along...
Will Schuester : [v.o] Suzy Pepper wasn't the first schoolgirl crush, but she was the hardest. It happened about two years ago, before you were a teacher here. Suzy was... unique.
Suzy Pepper : [raising her hand in class] Mr. Schue, how do you conjugate the verb... "to love"?
[cut to Suzy approaching his desk as the class leaves; she hands him a present, which is revealed to be a pair of socks with jalapenos on them]
Suzy Pepper : Peppers. So you can wear them and think of me. Suzy Pepper.
Will Schuester : [v.o] I thought it would burn out like the others, but it only got worse.
[another flashback; Will and Terri are in bed when his phone rings in the middle of the night]
Will Schuester : Hello?
[no sound except for heavy breathing]
Terri Schuester : Who is it? Who died?
Will Schuester : [the breathing continues] Suzy Pepper?
Suzy Pepper : You knew it was me just by the sound of my breath. That's so romantic.
Terri Schuester : [taking the phone] Listen, you little psycho, this is Will's wife. And if I don't get enough sleep, my antidepressants don't work, and then I'll go crazy and I'll kill you.
Will Schuester : Terri.
Terri Schuester : Stop calling.
[hanging up]
Terri Schuester : Can't you handle anything, Will?
