Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (TV Series)
P.C. (2010)
Christopher Meloni: Detective Elliot Stabler
Quotes
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Trey Greenway : Wait. A vampire cannot enter a room unless he's invited.
Detective Elliot Stabler : [pushing Greenway into the interrogation room] Here's your invitation.
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A.D.A. Alexandra Cabot : [Stabler had promised to get a confession from a suspect] That was quick. She didn't punch you again, did she?
Detective Elliot Stabler : Ah, you know some women just don't want to talk man to man.
Babs Duffy : [entering] Stabler!
Detective Elliot Stabler : I wish she'd refuse to talk to me.
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Trey Greenway : My music is art. My life is art!
Detective Elliot Stabler : You know what? Your life is gonna be prison, and it ain't gonna be blood that you're sucking in Sing Sing.
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Babs Duffy : What's your problem, Stabler?
Detective Elliot Stabler : Have you looked in the mirror lately?
Babs Duffy : You don't want me as an enemy?
Detective Elliot Stabler : Well, I'm pretty damn sure I don't want you as a friend either.
Babs Duffy : Oh, good. Because a friend would tell you, your ass is huge. I mean shouldn't you work out? Really, it's like it came down the back of your pants...
Detective Olivia Benson : [interrupts her] We're still on the case, Babs. And if we need any help, we'll be sure to call you.
[they walk away]
Babs Duffy : Alright, but how hard can it be? I mean look, I don't expect Assy McBigpants to catch anybody, but Benson, you seem pretty on the ball.
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Detective Olivia Benson : Our rapist has a website?
Detective Odafin 'Fin' Tutuola : Plus a bunch of songs you can download.
Detective Elliot Stabler : It's a heavy metal band.
Detective Odafin 'Fin' Tutuola : Death metal, more like. Think Black Sabbath or Judas Priest, only sicker and more violent.
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Detective Elliot Stabler : Did you know Ms. Davies personally?
Babs Duffy : You mean were we lovers? Because if two lesbians know each other then naturally next thing they're in their bra and panties and going down like the Titanic?
Detective Elliot Stabler : Are you for real?
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Detective Olivia Benson : Hey, El, can I ask you something?
Detective Elliot Stabler : Yeah.
Detective Olivia Benson : Do you ever get a gay vibe from me?
Detective Elliot Stabler : Would it matter if I did?
Detective Olivia Benson : You're not answering the question.
Detective Elliot Stabler : Well, it's not like you've had a lot of luck with guys.
Detective Olivia Benson : It's called being married to the job.
Detective Elliot Stabler : Did, uh, Babs make a move on you?
Detective Olivia Benson : [answers phone] Olivia Benson.
Detective Elliot Stabler : I get hit, you get hit on.
Detective Olivia Benson : And our perp gets shot.
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Detective Elliot Stabler : [to Benson] That was quite a performance. I think.