The Good Guys (TV Series)

$3.52 (2010)

Bradley Whitford: Dan Stark

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jack Bailey : What part of this looks illegal to you, Dan? This is a truck filled with boxes.

  Dan Stark : Yeah. Boxes full of crime.

• Dan Stark : I'm saying that being a cop is a team sport. It's you and me. You know, in the old days, we used to catch a bad guy, we'd call all our buddies, we'd let him go and we'd catch him again. Just so we could bust him together.

  Jack Bailey : Are you serious?

  Dan Stark : Yeah. We called it Catch, Release and Catch Again. Look, you gotta understand the difference between the good guys and the bad guys. Bad guys are just a bunch of guys running around with guns. Good guys are a team of guys running around with guns. You learn that, maybe you won't spend the rest of your career working Property Crimes with Dan Stark.

• Dan Stark : The Law's like a woman. She slaps you, doesn't do you any good to get mad. Just makes it worse. Little sweet talk... before you know it you're covered in baby oil, whip cream on your nipples.

• Dan Stark : On three. Uno. Dos. Three!

• Dan Stark : Am I under oath?

  A.D.A. Liz Traynor : Yes! And I would appreciate if you would stop asking that question.

• Dan Stark : [listening]  Sounds like we're on a two lane highway in a flat, rural area

  Jack Bailey : Dan, this is Texas, you just described 10 thousand square miles.

• Dan Stark : We got Wayne Young right where we want him.

  Jack Bailey : Yeah. On a two lane highway in a flat, rural area.

  Dan Stark : Exactly.

• Dan Stark : I can feel it tingling in my loins.

  Jack Bailey : That's another gem for the report.

• Jack Bailey : I can't believe I let you talk me into this.

  Dan Stark : I can't either.

• Dan Stark : It wasn't really a bomb. You just take the back off a transistor radio... it looks kinda bomb-ish. Kinda, no blood, no foul kind of thing.

• Dan Stark : I'm trying to put a hole in the wall so the cell-phone wavey thingies can get out.

  Jack Bailey : Dan, the cell phones aren't working because these walls are made with reinforced steel. So if you shoot at them, the only thing you're going to put a hole in is one of *us*.

• Jack Bailey : Are you seeing what I'm seeing?

  Dan Stark : Seems to be a flaming truck of some sort.

• Lucas O'Neill : [In court]  Even claiming to possess a bomb is a clear physical threat. An egregious violation of due process.

  Dan Stark : I think your shirt is egregious.

• Jack Bailey : God, yeah, that's a great idea. Why don't we jump out of a moving truck at 75 miles per hour and land on the asphalt.

  Dan Stark : What's wrong with that?

  Jack Bailey : Physics, Dan! It's suicide.

  Dan Stark : Not if you push off hard enough from the truck. It cancels out the speed of the truck. It's like when you're in an elevator and when it comes to a stop, you jump.

• Dan Stark : [holding a Swiss Army pocket knife]  I am trying to cut a hole with my knife so the cell phone wavey thingies can run free... because of your fear of the ricochet.

  Jack Bailey : You are trying to cut a hole in a bullet-proof steel wall with a pocketknife? Good luck with that.

  Dan Stark : [gives up]  I'll finish it later.

• Dan Stark : [offers a potato chip]  You want a chip?

  Jack Bailey : No, I don't want a chip, Dan.

  Dan Stark : Are you sure? They're barbecue. I think the...

  [examines chip] 

  Dan Stark : The dust they put on them makes you feel better.

• Dan Stark : That a boy! You going to die, might as well be in a hot rod!

• Jack Bailey : Maybe I wasn't clear about the whole 'by the book' thing. Searching a place without a warrant. That's not in the book, Dan.

  Dan Stark : Well, how about this... secondary exits must be unlocked during business hours. I say, as officers of the law, it is our duty to enter the premises and cite the owner.

  Jack Bailey : Hit him with a city violation?

  Dan Stark : Besides they should know their security is terrible.

• Dan Stark : Julius, the relationship between a detective and a snitch is a sacred bond. You don't return my calls, you make me chase you in parking garages, you violate that sacred bond.

• Jack Bailey : They're shutting down the investigation. That means no more department resources.

  Dan Stark : Department resources? Back in the day we didn't need department resources. Frank and me would hit the street.

  Jack Bailey : And what? Fight crime with pointed sticks and rocks? You need resources to run an investigation.

  Dan Stark : Tell you what. I will take 'em down with the cash in my pocket.

  [turns out pockets] 

  Dan Stark : 3 dollars and

  [counts change] 

  Dan Stark : 52 cents.

• Dan Stark : No one should be allowed back here without a hard hat.

  Jack Bailey : You mean like us?

  Dan Stark : Hey, it's a violation.

• Dan Stark : You don't know how to hotwire a car? What the hell do they teach you at the academy?

• Jack Bailey : What the hell was that?

  Dan Stark : We hug. I'm a hugger.