- Steve Smith: [after learning that Bobo the Gorilla wants him to stay with him overnight] I don't wanna die from Gorilla sex!
- Avery Bullock: [On the phone] I said kill them, kill them all! Yes, yes, them too; also them! No! not him, that's me...
- [hangs phone]
- Avery Bullock: Idiots.
- Roger the Alien: [about a country musician that plays at his bar] I... I don't understand it. They play three chords and whine about their lives, and the crowd goes nuts.
- Hayley Smith: You gotta listen to the words. Country music comes from the heart.
- Roger the Alien: It comes from the ass. Right in the middle of the ass.
- Stan Smith: [to Steve] This is all your fault. I'm supposed to be with my friends on the houseboat.
- Steve Smith: You don't have to keep picking me up from PSAT class.
- Stan Smith: No, I don't? What do I have to do, master? What a dick.
- Roger the Alien: We're poor, we've got too many kids, it stinks to high heaven. This'll inspire one hell of a country song. Just need a macchiato to get me going.
- [to Naydern]
- Roger the Alien: Where's our espresso maker, dear?
- Naydern: The what?
- Roger the Alien: [Scene cuts to Roger driving off] No, thank you!
- Hayley Smith: [to Roger] Hey, what happened to being a country singer?
- Roger the Alien: Oh, living the honky-tonk life was too hard. I'm doing calypso dancing now.
- Hayley Smith: I don't blame you. The woman you ran off with was a mess. Did she have a tattoo of Burt Reynolds on her stomach?
- Naydern: No, she didn't. It's Victor from "The Young and the Restless."
- [shows off her tattoo]