Bea Benaderet: Blanche Morton

Quotes 

• Blanche Morton : I think it's wonderful the way you and Jim share things together.

  Mr. Boardman : Yes, I've always believed in a strong father and son relationship.

  Gracie Allen : Oh, so have I! In fact, if a son and father weren't related to each other, they wouldn't even be in the same family!

• Blanche Morton : Anyhow, I admire what you've done with Jim.

  Mr. Boardman : Well, I felt it was my duty to share his experiences. Of course, I wasn't always able to keep him out of mischief. You know, boys will be boys.

  Gracie Allen : Well, when they're young it's the nicest thing they could be.

• Mr. Boardman : When he joined the Boy Scouts, I became Scoutmaster to the troupe in which he belonged. Oh, I shared many happy moments with Jim and the other lads.

  Gracie Allen : Oh, it must have been fun!

  Mr. Boardman : Yes, it was. I taught them how to build campfires, how to boil meat on a stick and how to bake potatoes in their skins.

  Gracie Allen : I hope it was a big campfire.

  Mr. Boardman : Why?

  Gracie Allen : Well, otherwise the boys might have caught cold, sitting around with nothing on, waiting for the meat and potatoes to be cooked.

  Mr. Boardman : No, I meant they were in their jackets.

  Gracie Allen : Well, they could have caught cold from here down too, you know!

  Blanche Morton : Oh no, no, honey, the baked potatoes were in their jackets.

  Gracie Allen : Well, alright, that kept their jackets warm, but from here down they were still in trouble!

  Mr. Boardman : Mrs. Burns, the jackets were on the potatoes.

  Gracie Allen : Oh. Then the boys were cold from here up too. What kind of a Scoutmaster were you?

• Blanche Morton : Mr. Boardman's a wonderful father! Gee, George should be more like him. He should do more things with his son and be closer to him.

  Gracie Allen : Why should George do things with Mr. Boardman's son? He's got a son of his own to be close to!