Two and a Half Men (TV Series)
Hookers, Hookers, Hookers (2010)
Charlie Sheen: Charlie Harper
Quotes
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Dr. Herb Melnick : So, Chris, what are you up to these days?
Chris Makelroy : Not a lot. After Lyndsey threw me out, I lost my job, started drinking heavily and I just found out I have a lump on my groin.
Dr. Herb Melnick : Bad place for a lump.
Charlie Harper : Tell me a good place.
Dr. Herb Melnick : Somebody else's groin.
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Charlie Harper : You'd really be willing to risk your marriage over a cute, young babysitter?
Dr. Herb Melnick : I certainly wouldn't risk it over a fat, ugly one.
Charlie Harper : Can't argue with that.
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Charlie Harper : You guys are no fun. I'm gonna call a hooker!
Lyndsey Mackelroy : Charlie, there's two young boys in the house!
Charlie Harper : Let them get their own hookers!
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Charlie Harper : [Inspecting the charred remains of Lyndsey and Alan's house] Honestly, I don't see why you can't live here!
Alan Harper : You're kidding right? There's no roof!
Charlie Harper : Wear a hat!