Death Valley (TV Series)
Pilot (2011)
Bryce Johnson: Officer Billy Pierce
Quotes
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Officer Joe Stubeck : [after shooting zombie in the head] Anybody want a Choco Taco?
[camera crew man vomits]
Officer Billy Pierce : Not this guy.
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Officer Billy Pierce : [after stabbing vampire pimp with a boom pole] You know what they say about boom poles don't you? You never hear em coming.
[puts on sunglasses CSI Caruso style]
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Sofia : [Sofia says something in spanish]
Officer Billy Pierce : I'm sorry, I don't speak VAMPIRE!
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Officer Billy Pierce : [In reference to fighting the undead] Do you wanna know why I do it?
Camera crew guy : Do I have to?
Officer Billy Pierce : [shows pornographic picture of two women] I do it for them.
Officer Joe Stubeck : Let me see that! I said I do it for my family!
Officer Billy Pierce : I've had this JPEG so long it's like they're my family. Technically I guess that makes it incest.
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Officer Joe Stubeck : Alright everybody hands in the air!
Officer Billy Pierce : [to Sofia] That means you vampire tits.
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Gary the John : This isn't what it looks like. I thought she was just a human prostitute.
Officer Billy Pierce : [repeats what the John says in mocking voice] What are we in a cow pasture? Cause I smell bullshit.