- John Oliver - Host: [pointing at audience member] Yes, you have! You have seen your dad's penis. Now, let me make this crystal clear New York, we have not just stumbled upon my new catch phrase. No, no. That stops here. No, no. No, no. Let's draw a line in the sand.
- [makes motion of drawing a line in the sand with his foot]
- John Oliver - Host: We have not just found my "Git 'er done!' That's not happening. That's not happening. I do not want to come to gigs in the future and see you wearing T-shirts reading, "You've seen your dad's penis."