Modern Family (TV Series)
Hit and Run (2011)
Julie Bowen: Claire Dunphy
Photos
Quotes
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Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : Okay. I'm going to tell you a story about a little girl who entered a beauty pageant, even though she was very, very scared that she was going to lose.
Claire Dunphy : Let me guess: you won.
Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : Of course I won. But I was talking about my cousin Maria Conchita. She had a nose like a toucan, she stuffed her body into this bikini, and at the end, she finished dead last.
Claire Dunphy : How is that a good story?
Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : She faced her fears, and it didn't kill her. What killed her two weeks later was a bus.
Claire Dunphy : Are you serious?
Gloria Delgado-Pritchett : Because she couldn't see anything coming with that big nose!
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Claire Dunphy : [seeing Alex passed out on the couch] What's wrong with her?
Phil Dunphy : Growth spurt.
Claire Dunphy : What's wrong with her?
Phil Dunphy : I drugged her.
Claire Dunphy : Phil!
Phil Dunphy : I accidentally gave her the nighttime allergy medicine.
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Claire Dunphy : Phil, where are you, honey? I need to talk to you. Do you know what our daughter did?
Phil Dunphy : [trying to cover up Alex's stupor] Nothing. She's fine. She's reading.
Claire Dunphy : No, not her. Haley. Haley, come over here. I want toA talk to you.
Phil Dunphy : There she is! Not a scratch on her.
Claire Dunphy : Do you have something you want to say to us?
Haley Dunphy : Uh...
Claire Dunphy : Mmm... let me help you out here. Fake IDs?
Phil Dunphy : What?
Claire Dunphy : Mm-hmm. Haley tried to get her and her friends some fake IDs.
Haley Dunphy : I wasn't going to use them for drinking. We just wanted to get into this club to see a band.
Claire Dunphy : She took a bunch of money from them, and then she lost it.
Phil Dunphy : How much?
Alex Dunphy : [slurring] $900.
Claire Dunphy , Phil Dunphy : You're kidding me!/Oh my god!
Haley Dunphy : It's not my fault! I gave the money to this guy. He's the one who ripped us off.
Claire Dunphy : [to Luke] What happened to your face?
Luke Dunphy : Oh. I ran into a door.
Phil Dunphy : Yeah.
Claire Dunphy : What happened to your face?
Luke Dunphy : Dad hit me.
Phil Dunphy : It was an accident. I was trying to open up a Band-Aid.
Claire Dunphy : Phil!