The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Bakersfield Expedition (2013)
Kaley Cuoco: Penny
Photos
Quotes
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Penny : [Referring to Amy and Bernadette's argument that if another superhero picks up Thor while he's picking up the hammer, then that superhero is picking up the hammer] Okay, wait. If I pick up a guy at a bar, and then he picks up another girl and we all leave together, did I pick up the girl?
Amy Farrah Fowler : [Hopefully] Did that actually happen?
Penny : [Avoiding the question] Hey, are we talking about me or are we talking about Thor?
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Amy Farrah Fowler : [arguing with Penny and Bernadette about a comic book] It says right here on the hammer "Whoever holds this hammer, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of Thor."
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Well, hold on. Who decides who's worthy? Does the hammer decide?
Amy Farrah Fowler : [simultaneously with Penny] No.
Penny : Yes.
Amy Farrah Fowler : It can't decide. It's a hammer.
Penny : You said it's a magic hammer.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Yeah, but it... it can't make decisions.
Penny : If Harry Potter's wand can make decisions, why can't Thor's hammer?
Amy Farrah Fowler : Okay, if you're gonna start comparing wands and hammers, I can't even take you seriously.
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Stuart : Let's see. Well, you got your basic clean good guys, Superman, Spiderman, Captain America. Then you have your darker anti-heroes, your Batman, your Wolverine, Punisher.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Oh, I do love a bad boy.
Penny : As evidence by your boyfriend and his fear of hamsters.
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Bernadette Rostenkowski : [Amy, Bernadette, and Penny enter the comic store the guys often go to, and every male stops what they're doing and stares at them in shock]
[Obviously uncomfortable]
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Why are they staring?
Amy Farrah Fowler : Who cares? Just soak it in.
[Then starts walking around, moving her hair from over her ear, then says the next line as if she were a 1940s girl talking to sailors]
Amy Farrah Fowler : Hello boys.
Stuart Bloom : [Comes out of the back room and sees the girls] Oh, hey.
[Then notices all the guys looking at them]
Stuart Bloom : Would you please stop staring? They're just girls. It's nothing you haven't seen in movies or in drawings.
Penny : Hey Stuart.
Stuart Bloom : Well, what brings you girls here?
Bernadette Rostenkowski : We were looking for a recommendation about comic books.
Stuart Bloom : Oh, well, I recommend you don't open a store and sell them.
Penny : No, we were wondering why the guys like the stuff so much, so we thought we'd give it a try.
Stuart Bloom : [as he speaks the next line, some of the customers start looking at the girls again] Oh ok, well what do you think you might be in to? Superheroes? Fantasy? Graphic novels? Manga?
[Turns on the others without taking a breath]
Stuart Bloom : I swear I will turn a hose on you!
[They scatter]
Bernadette Rostenkowski : What kind of comics do the guys like?
Stuart Bloom : Um, a little bit of everything. Mostly superhero stuff.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Alright, well who's the best superhero?
Stuart Bloom : [Frantically] Shhhh! You can't ask a question like that in here? Are you trying to start a rumble?
Penny : Well, what do you recommend?
Stuart Bloom : Oh, well um, you got your basic clean-cut good guys, like Superman, Spider-Man, Captain America, then you got your darker "anti-heroes", like Batman, Wolverine, Punisher.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Oooo, I do love a bad boy.
Penny : [Matter-of-factly] As evidenced by your boyfriend and his fear of hamsters.
Stuart Bloom : [Presenting a comic] If I were you, I'd go for Fables #1. The artwork is sophisticated, it's intelligently written, and it doesn't objectify or stereotype women.
Penny : [Distracted by another comic] Oooo, Thor! He's hot!
Stuart Bloom : Yeah, he kind of is.
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[first lines]
Leonard Hofstadter : Hey, will you steam my uniform next?
Sheldon Cooper : Yeah, uh, interesting. Do you recall this conversation? "Leonard, want to go halvesies on a steamer?" "No, Sheldon we don't need a steamer." Looks like that rumpled chicken's come home to roost.
Penny : [Comes in] Hi, here are the makeup sponges you asked for.
Leonard Hofstadter : Oh, thanks. I thought I had more.
Penny : [Looks in his makeup case, which he had just opened] Damn, you've got more makeup than I do. You got better makeup than I do.
[Takes something]
Penny : Yeah, I'm borrowing this.
Leonard Hofstadter : [Gently takes it back from her] Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, this is my Comic-Con makeup. I love you, but there are some things a man doesn't share with his girlfriend.
Sheldon Cooper : That's a wise policy. I once borrowed my sister's makeup for a costume contest, got a terrible case of pinkeye. Yeah, but luckily I was going as a zombie; I won second place.
Penny : I feel like you guys just went to Comic-Con.
Leonard Hofstadter : That was San Diego Comic-Con; this is Bakersfield Comic-Con.
Penny : Is that better?
Leonard Hofstadter : Mm, it's a lot smaller. It's more about the comics books, the way these conventions used to be before they went all Hollywood.
Sheldon Cooper : So to answer your question, no, it's not better.
Penny : Well then why are you going?
Sheldon Cooper : It's a comic book convention. Like pizza or particle accelerators even the stinky ones, still pretty good.
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Penny : Ah, the best! You have booze with breakfast on a Tuesday you got a problem. You do it on a weekend you got brunch.
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Amy Farrah Fowler : You can't pick something up in outer space. In space, there is no up.
Penny : Oh, yeah? Then how does the sun come up every day?
Amy Farrah Fowler : Hard to argue with those kind of street smarts.