- Berta: What's going on?
- Walden Schmidt: Well, it's complicated. Uh, you remember Jake's girlfriend Tammy? She has an 18-year-old daughter...
- Berta: ...and Jake nailed her.
- Walden Schmidt: [pause] OK, not that complicated.
- [Jake greets Ashley, Tammy's daughter, by kissing her passionately]
- Tammy: Get your mouth off my daughter, you cheatin' son-of-a-bitch!
- Walden Schmidt: [sotto vice, to Berta] That would make a great country song.