"The Almighty Johnsons" A Bit Like Buses Really (TV Episode 2013) - Michelle Langstone as Michele Brock

Michele Brock : Yesterday was proof, ladies. Gods are pricks, and none of them are worth our tears.
Anders Johnson : Were't you considerably less clothed last time I saw you?

Michele Brock : It's called bait, Anders. It's what you use to reel in a dumb animal.

Anders Johnson : I think of it as false advertising.

Michele Brock : Don't worry, you're still the top of my list.

Anders Johnson : Your "people I must annoy today" list?

Michele Brock : My revenge fuck list. I believe it's traditional, in the situation I now find myself, as the scorned woman, to fuck a friend or sibling to get back at the prick who dumped me. Given that Mike has no friends, that leaves the three of you, and I've already done Axl and have no need to go back, and Ty has a girlfriend and morality, so too much hard work, so that leaves you.

Anders Johnson : Oh, well, glad I passed your stringent criteria.

Michele Brock : Not really. You want it too much and Mike would totally expect it, which takes all the revenge out of it, and that's the fun bit.
Anders Johnson : What do you want, Michele, apart from making my penis want to crawl inside my body and never come out?

Michele Brock : And wouldn't that be doing the world a service?
Anders Johnson : Peas in a pod, us, but you know that.

Michele Brock : Silly me for thinking I might be better than that.

Anders Johnson : Can you stop that, please. I will not have self-pity in this bed. It's unattractive and makes me question my performance.

Michelle Langstone: Michele Brock