Community (TV Series)

Advanced Advanced Dungeons & Dragons (2014)

Danny Pudi: Abed Nadir

Photos 

Quotes 

• Abed Nadir : Was everyone's takeaway from last time that we can use D&D to reprogram brains? Nobody feels that we almost caused a suicide?

  Jeff Winger : We prevented one.

  [Almost says "Fat", but catches himself] 

  Jeff Winger : Fa... bulous Neil felt like a nobody. And thanks to us, he's still out there, doing this and that in the background.

  [Neil appears in the background, walking around] 

• Professor Buzz Hickey : Hank's a knob. He doesn't have any hobbies or interests. All he does is play that... What do you call that crap with the dungeons and the dragons?

  Abed Nadir : Dungeons & Dragons.

  Professor Buzz Hickey : That's the crap.

• Abed Nadir : [as the Dungeon Master]  You hear an ominous screeching. Moving upward into view, three huge, white arachnids with eagle wings.

  Hank Hickey : Sky Spiders.

  Dean Pelton : I draw my sword and I cry out, "Back, eight-legged demons! I will not scoop you up with a catalogue and let you outside on this day!"

• Professor Buzz Hickey : [Abed, the Dungeon Master, has informed his players that the in-game villain, the Necromancer, has escaped]  You can't just say he is gone! You owe us an ending!

  Abed Nadir : I owe you *nothing*. I'm a Dungeon Master. I create a boundless world and I bind it by rules. Too heavy for a bridge? It breaks. You're hit? Take damage. Spend an hour outside someone's front door fighting over who gets to kill him? He leaves through the back!

• Professor Buzz Hickey : [playing D&D]  The river runs east, I head west.

  Abed Nadir : [referring to Hickey's in-game character]  Tiny Nuggins scampers into the jungle.

  Professor Buzz Hickey : Hey pal, I didn't "scamper" in the jungles of Nicaragua, I'm not gonna to do it now.

• Abed Nadir : [as the Dungeon Master]  You awaken on a riverbank, surrounded by a treacherous, godforsaken, non-zip line vacation jungle.

  Annie Edison : [Playing the game as Hector the Well Endowed]  I build a fire and construct a crude wooden rack to dry my boots and oversized codpiece.

  Shirley Bennett : [Playing the game as Crouton the Druid]  And I can make some s'mores out of horse meat and s'more horse meat.

• Abed Nadir : [Playing D&D with Annie's stuffed animals]  You're still at the entrance to the chamber of grief. Your move, Mr. Tickles. You successfully pour more tea into Count Frogula's cup. That puts it at Hillary Rodham Kitten. Okay, you attempt to pass crumpets. You fail.