The Mysteries of Laura (TV Series)

Pilot (2014)

Debra Messing: Laura Diamond

Photos 

Quotes 

• Laura Diamond : Maximillia, what's up?

  Max Carnegie : 911 call from New Hall!

  [Laura races to the address, enters a room with walls covered in red] 

  Laura Diamond : This is a depraved, unspeakable act! I am sickened. Get ready to be inside for a very long time! Life as you know it is over! What do you have to say for yourselves?

  Nicholas Broderick , Harrison Broderick : Sorry Mommy!

• Deedee Walden : Please tell me you're NYPD

  Dan Hauser : Yes ma'am, captain Dan Hauser, my colleague detective Laura Diamond

  Deedee Walden : A middle-aged police woman! Just like on TV! I love that

  Laura Diamond : How awkward of you to say

  Deedee Walden : It's clear your face has seen so much

• Dan Hauser : Can I ask you why you're still wearing your wedding ring?

  Laura Diamond : I just haven't gotten around to taking it off

• Principal : I am afraid your boys are no longer welcome in the New Hall community

  Laura Diamond : Wow, wow, wow, no, no, no, no! I don't need them to be welcome, I just need to drop them off at 8 and pick them up at 5. Isn't there some kind of a detention hall?

  Principal : They are expelled! Done! Gone!

  Nicholas Broderick , Harrison Broderick : YEAH!

• Laura Diamond : So, get the valet to open the car

  Billy Soto : Yeah, How I am supposed to do that without a warrant?

  Laura Diamond : [sigh]  Oh Billy

  [dances to the valet] 

  Laura Diamond : Hi! Oh... I am so glad it's you, sweetie! I left something personal in my husband's car... my underwear

  [giggles] 

  Laura Diamond : We like to spice it up every other Wednesday. Anyway I just had a Brazilian and I'm feeling a little drafty... but if I have to interrupt my husband class, I will never hear the end of it! Please help me!

  [Valet opens the car] 

  Laura Diamond : Hiiii, thank you!