- Barry Goldberg: [Murray changes the channel] Hey, I was watching that!
- Murray Goldberg: I know.
- Barry Goldberg: Why did you do that?
- Murray Goldberg: Because I don't care. I thought that was clear by now.
- Barry Goldberg: [At a job interview] What's my biggest weakness? I have to say I'm honest and I'm lazy. What's your biggest weakness?
- Barry Goldberg: [At another job interview] Who would win in a fight against a tiger and a bear? An excellent question that you didn't ask, but one that I'm willing to discuss at length.
- Barry Goldberg: [At a third job interview] Minimum wage? No. What's maximum wage?
- Barry Goldberg: This is too much! I'm freaking out!
- Murray Goldberg: Don't freak out.
- Barry Goldberg: I'm freaking out!
- Murray Goldberg: Don't freak out!
- [Barry slaps the beer from Murray's hand]
- Murray Goldberg: What the hell was that?
- Barry Goldberg: I panicked! I... I didn't know what to do!
- Murray Goldberg: You drink it! You don't slap it across the room!
- Barry Goldberg: I know that now!
- Erica Goldberg: That is such a double standard!
- Barry Goldberg: No, it's not. It just means I win because I'm a boy and you're not.
- Erica Goldberg: That is the very definition of a double standard, idiot!