Siskel & Ebert (TV Series)

The Worst Films of 1996 (1997)

Gene Siskel: Self - Host

Quotes 

• Roger Ebert - Host : I'm told that "Little Indian, Big City" was a big hit in France. Over here, "Little Indian, Big City" was a big flop. If the French laughed at this, it helps me to understand why they think Jerry Lewis is the funniest man on Earth. In a movie filled with one scene after another, a consistent thread throughout the film was the awfulness of the dubbed dialogue, in which people speak English as if it had been translated out of French via a third language not known to either side. When we saw this movie, one of the reels was missing. A man from the movie company told us we could see the missing reel the next day. My colleague here informed him, quote: "If it was the legendary missing footage from "The Magnificent Ambersons", this movie would still suck." Very well said.

  Gene Siskel - Host : [chuckles]  Thank you very much...

  Roger Ebert - Host : You're welcome.

  Gene Siskel - Host : ...For remembering that. I forgot I...

  Roger Ebert - Host : It was a very nice line.

  Gene Siskel - Host : Thank you so much. Now, I wanna tell you something: I was in France, as you know, this summer.

  Roger Ebert - Host : Yes.

  Gene Siskel - Host : At the end of my trip, in Paris, at Brasserie Lipp, a great restaurant...

  Roger Ebert - Host : Yes, uh-huh?

  Gene Siskel - Host : ...I confronted my friend- my newfound French friends about this movie...

  Roger Ebert - Host : Yes? Uh-huh?

  Gene Siskel - Host : And they said, "We're astonished too. We thought it was horrible."

  [Roger laughs] 

  Gene Siskel - Host : I mean, I don't know what's going on there. That's a country, they got 12% unemployment, who knows what's going on.

  [Roger laughs loudly] 

• Roger Ebert - Host : [after showing clips from "House Arrest" and "Joe's Apartment"]  I would love to have a documentary of the story conference...

  Gene Siskel - Host : The pitches?

  Roger Ebert - Host : ...For some of these movies. WHAT did they tell each other? How, they're gonna write a check for MILLIONS of dollars. When you and I go out and buy a car, we probably think a lot harder about that than these people think about a $30 million budget for a COCKROACH movie. What are they thinking of?

  Gene Siskel - Host : Well, the number may be a little high, but the spirit...

  Roger Ebert - Host : Okay, a $20, $10, what would be the RIGHT price for a cockroach movie?

  Gene Siskel - Host : How about quarreling parents, trapped in a basement, attacked by cockroaches?

  [Ebert laughs] 

  Gene Siskel - Host : NOW you've got a movie!

• Gene Siskel - Host : [after Roger picks "Striptease" as one of his picks]  I think you're right on track with Demi Moore, uh, there was a coldness to the picture, she's gotten away from where she needs to be. Y'know, I made the joke, y'know, what's next: "Demi Goes to the Gynecologist"? I mean, what more could she possibly show us? I think her focus ought to be, she's a wonderful actress at times, she ought to focus on richer parts.