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Boblo Boats: A Detroit Ferry Tale (2022)
A swing and a miss
I went in with the highest of hopes, but I came away unfulfilled.
Instead of focusing on the boats their history from their building to their current status,and perhaps the park history itself, we got the standard PBS-style "the past was great/everything was racist" dichotomy REALLY fast and prominent.
There was so little archival footage of the many, many times the boats were featured on the news or in commercials. There was zero discussion of the legal issues mandating how the Ste. Claire will never again be a steam-powered vessel which is the basis for the plan to make it a static entity.
I was shocked there was zero coverage of the decline during the AAA-Michigan years, how the move of millions to the suburbs, the lack of investment under AAA and subsequent ownership, the interstate highway system, the cost of maintaining both vessels--and the island conspired to make Cedar Point the go-to local amusement park destination for most, sealing Bob-Lo's fate.
I could tell this film was made by someone not familiar with the region and oh too happy to project his Woke vision of why the park failed over the simple facts that are plain for all to see--if they look. He didn't.
Cry Macho (2021)
Terrible!
I grew up loving Clint Eastwood movies. Loved so many. Not so this one.
What the hell was this mess?
This movie was so bad it made That's My Boy look like Citizen Kane.
Mary Queen of Scots (2018)
A victim of PC casting, slow pacing, and a complete disregard for using names to identify characters
If you're looking for Saoirse Ronan's Oscar reel, this is it. She does a nice job, but the movie suffers from slow pacing, meaningless dialogue, and virtually anonymous supporting characters.
Is England out of White actors? I ask because a Black face anywhere in England or Scotland in the Tudor Era would have been an anomaly, yet they cast Adrian Lester to play Thomas Randolph, Elizabeth's ambassador to Scotland. Do WHAT??
Lester is a fine actor, but why not have him drive a Honda around London too? It's about as historically accurate. That's not the only case either. What next. Roots with an all-White cast? Hamlet as an Asian prince of Denmark? I know, Caitlyn Jenner as MLK!
When one undertakes to make a historical film, at least pretend to do so accurately. It starts out a nice BBC docudrama, it ends up being Mary, Men in Tights.
Also, shame on whomever talked Margot Robbie into taking a role where she looked so hideous. You are a heartless creature who would draw a moustache on the Mona Lisa.
The Forgotten Martyr: Lady Jane Grey (2011)
Just awful!
It's rare to find anything this bad. They could have put Jane Grey on roller skates and come out with a better film.
Hatfields and McCoys: Bad Blood (2012)
So wildly inaccurate as to be unwatchable
In this who's who of actors who haven't worked in years, there's virtually nothing here worth the two hours it took to watch. Bad acting, horrid script, and far better alternatives that tell the story more accurately make this a useless film.
I wanted to like it, I really did. There was no reason to depart so much from known facts. I should've known better when I saw Jeff Fahey listed as the lead. Has he ever had anything that wasn't straight to video cheese? It's ore a film students project or some kind of attempt to milk tax dollars out of a film incentive program than an honest attempt to make a solid film.
Marie Antoinette (2006)
Directing is NOT genetic!
Sophia Coppola is further proof Hollywood's fascination with nepotism must end! Sure, she got lucky with Lost in Translation, but really, what did she possibly have to direct with a talent like Bill Murray?
Here, she has much younger and inexperienced talent (including her horribly wooden cousin, Jason Schwartzman). A competent director might have gotten better performances, but might have cast his own family with similar results...
And the music supervision? Was this an Amy Heckerling flick or a period piece set in 18th Century France? Was Adam Ant on Louis XVIII's iPod? I'm glad the studio lost money on this turd! Maybe they'll leave film making to those with experience, talent, and education, not simply famous names.
To whom do I speak about getting my 123 minutes returned?
Lucky Louie (2006)
Funny? Then so is chewing glass
Whomever told Louie CK he's funny should be taken out and beaten. I thought Jack Black was the world's least entertaining person, but this guy is light years ahead of him.
If I had a choice of eating week-old garbage and watching his show again, I'd have to give some serious thought to grabbing a fork!
Thankfully, HBO has canned this train wreck and with any luck, this guy will fade away. Maybe we'll see him working back at the dry cleaners, where he belongs, and not polluting the airwaves with unfunny stories, situations and canned laugh tracks.
Why must I write ten lines? I think I just threw up a little in my mouth revisiting this rot. Writing ten lines should qualify me for a purple heart!
Band Camp (2005)
Who ever thought anyone could make a worse sequel than "American Wedding"?
Can't blame the cast for this one. It must have been written by a retarded eight-year old. The cast did all they could with weak material, but this one is horrid! Wouldn't it have made more sense to make a "baby" or "high school reunion" sequel? That or let the series die.
While most of the cast of the original two refused to do the third, a wise move, only one is actually still making major releases still (if you count Dukes of Hazzard), so I'm guessing those prematurely-swelled heads have been deflated enough to mean they could appreciate the work.
In fact, come to think of it, this movie is so bad, I'm surprised it isn't "National Lampoon's Band Camp". It's at about that level of bovine bile.