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5/10
Melody Perkins Strikes Back
20 July 2005
Marky Mark,fresh off of the success of the blockbuster smashes "Fear" & "Boogie Nights", does battle with simians from another planet in Tim Burton's monkey nonsense of epic budget.On par with the first two sequels in the previous series,but not nearly as wrenched as the the justly forgotten TV series,or the last sequel,"Battle" for that matter. At least it's better than the Disney remake of Mighty Joe Young,saved only by the special effects of ape wizard Rick Baker,who did honors on both,& in an uncredited role,wreaked vengeance as the title role in the infamous 1976 King Kong version of the often told tale.While on the subject of Dirty Apes & remakes,one only wishes that Peter Jackson had cast the lovely Miss Melody Perkins (who has a small cameo role here),in the part of the damsel in distress role made famous previously by Fay Wray & Jessica Lange prior in the upcoming third take.She had the beauty & the brains,not to mention the cunning charisma, to pull it off.
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Coyote Ugly (2000)
Showgirls Redux
28 June 2005
Think of this as an unofficial & toned down PG-13 remake of Showgirls if you will.There is a trace of wit & satire found here,believe it or not,just as there was located in that infamous United Artists release.Melody Perkins sparks matters up at the end with a brief bit,one of the best in the film.She steals the show here,just as she did nonstop in her immortal role on Power Rangers in Space.Of Ms. Perkins film credits so far,I shall give Coyote Ugly the edge,second only to Power Rangers in Space of course.I think the film was unfairly panned at the time of release,it's quite enjoyable as a matter of fact,spellbinding escapist fun.Enjoyed the new Director's Cut as well.My Uncle William Hagood owns & operates Atlanta's high class Cheetah Lounge,& I couldn't help but be reminded of it throughout the film.
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Power Rangers in Space (1998–1999)
When will this highly popular chapter of the Power Ranger saga make it's way to DVD?
27 June 2005
Look forward to when this highly popular chapter of the Power Ranger saga makes it's way to DVD in a boxed set containing both seasons.The Countdown to Destruction episode now currently located on the "Best of" disc released by Disney 2 years ago was a promising preview to say the least of things to come.I hope Disney talks the lovely,multi-talented,& voluptuous Melody Perkins to record a commentary track.She was the show,as endless people have already stated before,I see a bright future ahead for this blonde bombshell of epic proportions.She's so full of charisma,that I can only stare in awe of her presence.She channels the best work of early "Frances" era Jessica Lange,with a touch of Jennifer Jason Leigh thrown in for good measure.Here's looking at you Melody! Favorite episode was without a doubt,Dark Specter's Revenge Part 1,mostly because it was the last appearance of the classic Astronema attire(say it ain't so!),and on top of which I admired the Louise Brooks inspired look throughout,she looked as if she just walked off the set of G.W. Pabst's silent masterpiece Pandora's Box.
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Superman III (1983)
Look Up in the Sky!?! It's a Turkey,It's a Turd,It's the Massive & Bloated Egos of the Salkinds!!!!!!
25 February 2002
After the overwhelming success of "Superman"(with STM ranking #2 in the year end box office & being placed on Roger Ebert's 10 Best of Year list)& "Superman II"(also ranked #2 in year end box office gross & again praised by critics)it was only natural that a third follow-up to the first two blockbusters was invetiable,however,keep in mind that director Richard Donner, (who was mainly responsable for the verisimilitude of the first two installments),& Screenwriter Tom Mankiewicz(who wrote the screenplays for STM & SII,despite the "Creative Consultant" credit),were neither involved,an early warning sign to say the least,plus the stakes were raised even higher when Richard Pryor,one of the great modern comics of our era,was cast in an important role as the chief villian, now don't get me wrong,Pryor is a very talented & funny actor in such classics as Car Wash,Silver Streak,Muppet Movie,Stir Crazy,Bustin' Loose,& The Toy among others,but what the heck is he doing here?ahhh,but that's where our good ol' friends the Newman's come in,who decided to play the material for laughs,thus nailing the coffin lid on the series(& effectually killing it.)Want to know what the upcoming Jon Peters/McG project "Superman Lives" will look like? Look no further than here,only with McG at the helm,& not an auteur like Richard Lester,my guess is that it will be much,much worse.
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Bug (1975)
Creepy Low Budget 70's Eco-Horror
1 February 2002
Hadn't seen this since I was 8,so I didn't know what to expect,since it was directed by the infamous Jeannot Szwarc,who helmed such big budget disasters such as Supergirl & Santa Claus The Movie,have to say it was very creepy,well made, & even scary in some spots,believe me,after watching this,you'll be up all night spraying your kitchen with heavy doses of Raid.I hope that Paramount releases this on DVD.Check It Out!!!
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Supergirl (1984)
It's a Bird, It's a Plane,It's a Turkey!
27 January 2002
A misfire from start to finish,after the dismal failure of Superman III,Chris Reeve vowed to never play Supes again,the Salkinds who owned the rights to the Superman characters,embarked on a spinoff instead,starring Superman's cousin,the Maid of Might,given the star power & big budget however,Supergirl is still a disapointment.The fault lies with director Jeannot Szwarc,who unlike Richard Donner,plays the story for high camp,which just doesn't work with this material & Faye Dunaway,who gives such an over the top performance she'd make Gloria Swanson proud.Granted there are some high points,the photography by Alan Hume is beautiful(check out the widescreen DVD),the Jerry Goldsmith score is fantastic,& the special effects are pretty decent,considering this was made in 1984 & before CGI,but somehow,the bad points outweigh the good,it just never comes together,& the whole project seems rushed & forced.The film was a box office disaster & today is seen as some sort of cult classic,mostly due to Dunaway. As respected film critic icon Roger Ebert said at the time of it's release;"Why even go to the trouble of making a film that feels like it's laughing at itself?" Director Jeannot Szwarc went on to direct an even bigger bomb for the Salkinds,the infamous Santa Claus(1985).
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One of the Best Made Shockers from the 60's
27 January 2002
First saw this movie when I was 12 years old at a horror movie festival. One of the most powerful,shocking,disturbing,well made,& black humored tales of the turbulent 60's,compared this to such tame,wimpy,mainstream garbage like Scream to see what I mean.Romero pulls no punches & really delivers the goods.The beginning has to be the best part,Romero has us set up to believe Johnny will be the hero of the piece,only to have the tables turn on him,and considering what happens to Johnny,his return towards the end is shocking & surprising,an image of terror that is surely one of horror cinema's best.Plus what happens to Barbara is even more surprising,we except her to get over her brother's death in a matter of minutes & do everthing she can to kill the ghouls & get out of the house(a mistake that was unwisely made in the worthless remake)She however does not,instead she withdraws into a catonic state,believing Johnny is alive even though she witnessed his demise,and at one point,even attempting to run out of the safety of the farmhouse!!!You have to give credit to Romero for making the brave & wise decision of having the lead hero being black,which was unheard of back then,unfortunately since then,it seems every time we see a black person in a horror movie,they are always the first to get killed off. The ending still packs a punch,turning the tables on all those cliche endings of the 50's & 60's.Your best bet is to seek out the out of print Elite DVD,it was made from the original negative & is THX approved.Also available in two different colorized versions,one from the now defunct Hal Roach Studios,the other a more recent release from CST.If you must watch the color version,go with CST/Best. Also released in a cut & butchered "Anniversary" edition,avoid it like the plague,otherwise you've been warned............
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Superman II (1980)
10/10
Reeve At His Best!
25 January 2001
I saw Superman II two years after seeing Superman. I saw it on the ABC Movie of the Week.I fell in love with it. Valerie Perrine & Hackman were back too bad Eve didn't have a bigger part.That aside,I loved the performances of the three phantom zone Villains My Favorite being Sarah Douglas's Ursa.For awhile there,I thought Reeve had met his match,In the end good always truimps over evil. STM & SII are the best comic book movies out there. Give them a shot.10 out of 10****stars.Check out the extended version and watch for the DVD in May.
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Superman (1978)
10/10
You'll Believe This Film Will Soar!
25 January 2001
What can I say? I loved this movie since I was six years old. Christopher Reeve IS the man of steel. When they make "Superman Reborn" The actor chosen to play supes will have to live in Reeve's Shadow,and I doubt if the new supes will capture the childhood spirit in us all like STM Did.Marlon Brando gave an outstanding performance as Jor-El, Gene Hackman WAS Fantastic as Lex Luthor,Valerie Perrine was memerizing and sexy as Eve,Ned Beatty was Funny as Otis,Jackie Cooper did such a fine impression as Perry White I expected him to say "Great Ceaser's Ghost!" any minute,Glen Ford was Touching as Pa Kent,I always cry at his death scene,and last but not least Reeve WAS AND WILL ALWAYS be the man of steel in my heart. Be sure and check out the extended version and watch for the SE DVD this May.A Classic! A 10 out of 10****stars!
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Jaws 3-D (1983)
1/10
Check Your Brain at the Box-office......
12 January 2001
Warning: Spoilers
DUM,DUM,DUM,DUM.....Just when you thought you were safe from sequels... Comes this second dreadful,horrid,and poorly acted film.Louis Gosset Jr. sports a terrible ghetto accent thoughout the film,probably hoping he won't be recongnized.James Bond Hopeful(at the time)Simon McQuade plays a Costeuo-like Documentary filmaker,Mr.Fritz-Royce who*spoilers ahead* gets swallowed whole by Mrs. Bruce.Bess Armstrong(High Road to China) plays the love interest,but hey, at least she's better than Karen Young in Jaws the Revenge.Dennis Quaid(The Parent Trap,The Right Stuff,Dreamscape) is the now grown up Mike Brody,who with Martin Brody out of the film,is the hero.John Putch is Shawn still afraid of the Deep Blue Sea(get it?)In case your wondering the *cough* "plot" is set at SEA WORLD FLORIDA,not AMITY ISLAND,like in first two and "the revenge". A major plot point from the british sci-fi classic "Gorgo" is reused. What this film needs the most is to be released in Widescreen at it's 2:35.1 aspect ratio(plus with the 3-D process)on DVD. Hopefully if the Jaws 2 Special Collecter's Edition released this coming summer is a success,we might just see that,until then,avoid the atrocias video and Television Versions,Catch this fish at your nearest revival theater and enjoy some cheap thrills in 3-D.
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King Kong (1976)
10/10
Kong Goes Ape Over Lange(and who can blame him?)
12 January 2001
I loved this movie ever since I saw it on ABC TV(with all the extended footage)in the early 80's.John Barry's score is superb,and should be released on an expanded CD. I love the DVD that came out two years ago, but have one complaint;where's all the footage that was on the network version?that aside,I loved Lange in this movie,Grodin was funny as the bad guy,and Bridges gave a one from the heart performance.All in All a haunting and unforgetable film.For more classic Lange check out Frances and Tootsie.
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1/10
dum,dum,dum,DUMB!!!!!!
6 January 2001
Warning: Spoilers
Hey I have seen some bad movies, and then I have seen BAD movies. This movie was torture.so horrible that every horrid moment felt like a death sentence! Good ol' Bruce isn't the only thing fishy about this terrible third soggy sequel; the horrid editing(the shark attacks, the nightmares, and the poor climax)suggest this was the work of another predator as well:the cutting room floor! I mean all concerned with this motion picture must have thought a fast pace would move things along.IT DOES NOT!!! Good ol' wife Loraine Gary(strangely absent from Part 3 AND wife of the universal pictures chairman.)returns as Big bad mama Brody who inanely blames the SAME Bruce from Parts 1&2(it ignores 3)conveniently forgetting the 2 others were blown or electrocuted- when *spoilers ahead* Sean Brody becomes fish food at the beginning of this film.Just what have we got here....Jason the shark?Gary tries to make us believe she's the toughest grandma in the Bahamas when she later tackles Bruce on her own;the idiocy of this *cough* "plot devlopment" simply caps a script which passes beyond ludicrous in the first five minutes. Not even Bruce the shark,Micheal Caine, or the restored DVD with five minutes can save this trash. AVOID AT ALL COSTS!!!!!!!!!
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10/10
Lisa Schrage and Brock Simpson Rule!!!!!!!
29 December 2000
I've loved this film ever since I saw it on "USA Up All Night"! The haunting and unforgetable about a prom queen back from the grave... What can I Say? Paul Zaza's score should be released on CD,Lisa Schrage should've won an oscar for her Bedazzling Performance as Mary Lou,Wendy Lyon was fantastic, especially in that blue dress, but last but not least is Brock Simpson, HE IS THE MAN!!!!I busted a gut through the whole movie, He was so Funny!!!(He was in all the prom night films and worked with writer Ron Oliver on Liar's Edge.)I mean him and Randy from Scream could become the next Siskel & Ebert! It's out of print now, but hopefully Anchor Bay will release it someday as a special edition DVD. I give it 10 out of 10. For another classic Lisa Schrage performance check out Food of the Gods 2. Give it another look.
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10/10
He Knows When You've Been Naughty.....
28 December 2000
What a cool movie! the best killer santa movie ever made! I agree with the comments above. You do get to know Billy inside and out before and after he takes that fateful Christmas Eve drive. The acting,direction,and script were superb! The score was Haunting!!! We ought to petition to have Columbia/Tri-star rerelease this as a special edition DVD!
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Angel (1983)
6/10
Something Sweeeeet
28 December 2000
I love this movie! Donna Wilkes does a super acting job as Angel/Molly She's the best "Angel" of them all in my book!(no offense Besty Russel, by the way I loved you in Tomboy!)The late,great, and superb Dick Shawn is funny as Angel's friend and mentor.Steve Porter is Delightful as YoYo Man. Susan Tyrell is fun as the landlord! I hope since they own the rights Anchor Bay releases all the Angel's on DVD like they did with "Tuff Turf" another great New World Movie. All in all I give it 6 out of 10.
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10/10
A Bizarre,Complex, and Strange Film
28 December 2000
From King of Kings writer Phillip Yordon comes this strange and Haunting film about a young girl(played in Superb Fashion by Merideth Haze) who becomes entangled with a handsome stranger, a bizarre "Death Club", and a strange millionaire who wants her only for himself. This film never got to play in theatres(it went straight to video in 1985.) Yet somehow it grows on you. if your a fan of Mr. Yordon's work I recommend Cataclysm,Scream Your Head Off,Bloody Wednsday, and the downright frightful Night Train To Terror. Maybe someday Anchor Bay will release all these titles on DVD as "The Phillip Yordon Collection". Until then give it another look.
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