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Reviews
Once Upon a Time in... Hollywood (2019)
LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO WASTE ON A BAD MOVIE THIS LONG.
I like Tarantino, but holy (insert expletive)! This is the most meandering, self indulgent, pointless film I have seen in at least two decades. What on earth was he thinking? About 90% of it belongs on the cutting room floor. Every scene is insanely long, and most of them have nothing to do with the story-mainly because there is no story. I could go on and on, but I'll leave that to Tarantino!
Vicky Cristina Barcelona (2008)
BRILLIANT -ONE OF MY ALLTINE FAVORITE MOVIES
Almost everything about this movie is either perfect or close to perfect. I can't think of any other movie quite like it. I watch it at least twice a year, and it just seems to get better and better.
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (2017)
UNWATCHABLE-ABOVE ALL, UNFUNNY!
I am so tired of hearing people rave about this juvenile show. What is the matter with our culture-to think that this inane show is worth watching? I have tried and tried; I think I've watched the first three or four episodes at least twice each, but I always just get angry. Have our standards really fallen that much? The worst thing about it is that she never says a single thing that's funny. You have all these audiences laughing their heads off, and you don't even smile, because none of it is funny. It's just awful. It's also loaded with period anachronisms and NY Jewish stereotypes, but that's another story. Ugh!
Marriage Story (2019)
SHOULD BE CALLED DIVORCE STORY
This movie is excellent, but I think it's strange that it's called marriage story, because it's entirely about a divorce-which is strangely, as you will know if you have been through it, not really about the marriage anymore. All the performances are top-notch, and the two leads are brilliant, though for some reason Scarlett Johansson, in her wardrobe, grooming, and behavior, plays the part as a somewhat masculine lesbian, which made me keep thinking there was going to be a turn of events that never occurred-which, in turn, made that choice inexplicable. Also, the two randomly inserted Stephen Sondheim songs are simply bizarre in context. They are poorly performed, and seem to be there for absolutely no reason whatsoever. But these are small things compared to the overall product, which is well worth watching.
The Irishman (2019)
Scorcese's same old obsession, but this is embarrassing.
Two 76 year-old actors and one 80 year-old playing young guys. Or should I say young fellas? Either way, it's embarrassing. If you feel like you've seen this interminably long film several times before-it's because, essentially, you have. I should confess that I have never appreciated films that attempt to glamorize mobsters, but now that we have a crook running the government, I have no patience with this at all. But mostly, it's really boring.
Late Night (2019)
QUITE IRONICALLY, IT'S OLD-FASHIONED!
Ok, full disclosure, I'd watch anything with Emma Thompson, and that's what initially drew me to this. I like Mindy Kaling as well, but Emma is a human world-heritage site. The movie is enjoyable, although conventional in every detail. (It's kind of a quasi-remake of "Morning Glory." with Rachel McAdams.) What I found most strange about it is that Kaling plays a girl who is hired to update a show that has become old-fashioned, so then why write an old-fashioned movie? Of course, Kaling is not a girl, she's a 40 year old woman, playing a gurl-and, I'm sorry, but Hugh Dancy's attraction to her just makes you feel embarrassed for Ms. Kaling. Someone should have been as honest with her as she is with Emma Thompson's character in the movie.
Eat Pray Love (2010)
BELONGS ON THE HALLMARK CHANNEL
This movie is beautiful to look at. The people are beautiful to look at. The food is beautiful to look at. The places are beautiful to look at. But, in terms of substance, it is total BS. The main problem is that it tries desperately to portray cowardice, and the inability to face up to the vicissitudes of relationships, as some sort of courage or even heroism. It's a total waste of time. Nice fantasy for lonely women though, I guess.
American Crime Story (2016)
BRILLIANTLY PERFORMED & WRITTEN....B U T....ONE MAJOR PROBLEM!
This is so excellently put together in every respect, and it brought back so many memories of when the entire country was gripped by this trial. But there is one major problem. Those of us who watched the trail from gavel to gavel, as well as the endless news commentary, were certain beyond any doubt that OJ was guilty. But this series, in what is possibly an attempt at pandering to prejudices, suggests that false evidence may have p;anted, and subtly infers OJ''s possible innocence. This is just wrong. And sad.
The Phantom of the Opera (2004)
THE SOUND OF MUCK
What a monumental mountain of crap this is-although, it's exactly what the stage production deserves. The music is the very definition of schmalz-and low-grade schmalz at that. The sets and costumes are almost unimaginably vulgar, which means they fit this score to perfection. The poor girl playing the leading role would be laughed out of even an amateur opera audition. I was "lucky" enough to be invited to the opening night of the show on Broadway back in the 80s, and even then I wanted to leave at intermission. I thought the film might be an improvement, but it was just the reopening of an old wound. The fact that so many people think so highly of this show is a real indictment of contemporary theater. It really shows how low we have sunk.
The Laundromat (2019)
IT'S A HOT MESS-AND YET, IT'S WORTH WATCHING!
There's so much talent and so much money involved in this project-which is sometimes ironically the kiss of death-but I give Soderberg props for taking a lot of big chances here. Most of them don't work, but it's certainly not boring, and the central story is an important one.
Now Hear This (2019)
Almost Works, but...
This could have been a great series, but Scott Yoo is a boring, plebeian host who keeps inserting himself and his violin into everything, but I suppose that's what his life's all about. Anyway, it's not what my life is all about. If you're going to talk about Scarlatti, talk about Scarlatti. (Speaking of which, the idea that no one has ever heard of Scarlatti is a joke. He's an incredibly famous composer.)
Schitt$ Creek (2015)
WHAT A PILE OF SCHITT .
Ghastly on every level. To see two of my favorite actors in this catastrophe was truly depressing.
Succession (2018)
BRILLIANT SERIES with one small exception.
Besides being addictive and engrossing and entertaining, this series is the ultimate indictment of the rich and powerful in the world we live in today. It's kinda sorta a roman-a-clef about Rupert Murdoch and his family, albeit with all kinds of fictional dramatic situations. The acting is uniformly brilliant, as is the writing-although the only negative thing I can say about the show has to do with the writing. Whenever writers from the UK write about Americans, they think we all use the kind of language that you might find in a working class pub in Dublin around closing time. So, when the entire cast uses the F word in every sentence, the dialogue does not ring true to an actual American. But don't let that stop you. The series is an absolute must see!
The Politician: October Surprise (2019)
EXCELLENT.
I wish I could mention the things I liked best about this show, but that would involve spoilers, and that would be unfair, so just check it out.
Broadchurch: Episode #3.1 (2017)
"Are you alright" Chris Chibnall?
Ok, the title of my review was a little cheeky, but I've spent a lot of time in the UK, and people don't ask each other "Are you all right?" or "Are you OK?" every two or three minutes, especially when they've just been raped, or are covered in blood, or have just discovered a body, or whatever. It seems to be an odd tick on the part of an otherwise excellent writer, Chris Chibnall. But I gave the show 10 stars anyway, because it really is brilliant. Actually, season one and two are brilliant. Season three is a hot mess. In fact, season three is rubbish. But DO watch the first two seasons.
Tales of the City (2019)
It Can't Be This Bad, Can It? Oh, But It Can!
I recalled enjoying the original series, so I thought it would be fun to watch this sequel. Not only was it not fun, it was the antidote to fun. It's ghastly. So, I thought I would go back and watch the original series, and that would make me feel better. But guess what? The original series is pretty bad too. I thought I had better taste 25 years ago. Don't waste one minute of your life on either series, unless you're curious about what it would be like to be gay on, say, Mars.
The Last Czars (2019)
SUCH A DISAPPOINTMENT!
This series starts out as a drama,narrated by one of the characters, and seems very promising. Then, a few minutes in, out of nowhere, It turns into a documentary. Except, it's not a documentary, because it keeps shuttling back-and-forth between fully staged dramatic scenes and the usual rubbish that comprises every contemporary historical documentary-i.e., talking to an imaginary person off-camera, while telling dubious historical details-in the present tense-even when that makes no sense. Ugh. It could have been a wonderful series, but it's just another disappointment.
Return to Peyton Place (1961)
SO MANY PROBLEMS
First of all (and it pains me to say this, because Franz Waxman is such an excellent composer), the musical score is incessant and intrusive to the point of being maddening at times, starting with the opening scene. The acting is predictably wooden given the choice of actors. Alas, the most brilliant actor on the set is Jose Ferrer, but he's behind the camera-a job he never did well. The cinematographer seems obsessed with trees and tree branches and, well, the whole film's a hot mess. The title song is pleasant, though. (It's sung by the director's wife, Rosemary Clooney.)
The Palm Beach Story (1942)
Too Idiotic Even To Be Called Screwball
I realize that this is supposed to be a classic, presumably because of the cast and the director, but it's one of the most idiotic, unfunny comedies I have ever seen. (And TCM gives it 4 stars!)
The Loved One (1965)
Too Awful For Words
As I have already implied, this movie is too awful for words, and since I would have to use words to review it, I am unable to do so.
Les rendez-vous d'Anna (1978)
THE MINUTES FLY LIKE HOURS.
OR MAYBE DAYS.
(I received a message that my review was too short so I'm typing this just to stretch it out a bit. It's kind of ironic though because the film seems longer than death.)
The Young Lions (1958)
Brilliant and unique.
I can't believe I have never seen this film before. It's rather long, but it doesn't seem long because the various storylines are so engrossing. The writing, direction, and performances are top-notch. It must have been quite controversial when it was first released, because World War II was not so far in the distance, and the film depicts relatable people on both sides, strictly from a human point of view. Highly recommended.
The Man Who Saved Ben-Hur (2016)
Uniquely Touching
This is an odd documentary about an odd man, but I found it engrossing and touching. I was disappointed when it was over-but only because I wanted it to continue.
Book Club (2018)
No Ageist Stone Unturned
The real problem here is that the screenplay was written by two people who are 30 years too young to write it, and they indulge in every cliché about old age (and particularly older women) imaginable. There certainly are some funny lines, and with all the talent that's on screen, it could've been a far better film. Still, I didn't think it was a total waste of time. Oh-except for the entire flimsily transparent premise-about 50 shades of freaking grey!
Book Club (2018)
No Ageist Stone Unturned
The real problem here is that the screenplay was written by two people who are 30 years too young to write it, and they indulge in every cliché about old age (and particularly older women) imaginable. There certainly are some funny lines, and with all the talent that's on screen, it could've been a far better film. Still, I didn't think it was a total waste of time. Oh-except for the entire flimsily transparent premise-about 50 shades of freaking grey!