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Reviews
Rebel Moon - Part Two: The Scargiver (2024)
Slow Mo slug
I was hoping all the bad reviews on part 1 would force Netflix to do something go fix the damages. But no, Zack was again given a free rein to produce a worser slow mo pretentious throw up movie. The dialogues are really weak, characters loath full. I would have been happy if they bombed the moon and everyone in it to oblivion. The good guys in the movie are that annoying. And that is where Zack fails as a filmmaker. The scenes of slow mo farming day, giving gifts to Kora and co and training the villagers to fight the soldiers were so cringy. I am really sad this is where Netflix is chosing to spend the money they make from my subscription.
Rebel Moon - Part One: A Child of Fire (2023)
Clickbait of a movie
Netflix has been teasing the epic movie they had in the works for 2 years now. And finally when it releases, you want to play it the very second and you then learn what a terrible waste of time it is.
The movie's story line has all the usual ingredients for a very generic plot. There is the lead character who has a mysterious past but its revealed without much ado. She is said to be fighting with her inner demons and she expresses that with a 24/7 constipated Bella from Twilight kinda face. Her action sequences although repetitive are the highlight of the movie. She lives in hiding in a farming village where they have automatic sliding doors, but their alarm system is a gong that you have to strike with a hammer. And they plough fields the old fashioned way, lol.
All the men are super chiseled. Even someone who walked away from their military career and was living as a drunk on the streets has a chiseled to perfection body. There is a quintessential Asian character who is a swordswoman who runs into a barrage of bullets swishing her swords. Her action choreography was one of the lowest points of the movie.
All in all, a really boring waste of money. I feel terrible when Netflix wastes money on projects like this and Archies, then spend a bomb on PR, then gets enough watches on the first day to get it trending and then boast about it. We watch these movies on the first day only because we don't have to buy tickets. Otherwise it would have bombed tenfold than the lowest grossers of 2023.
Irugapatru (2023)
Cringe fest all over
The movie is all about couples struggling in their marriages and how they learn to overcome the struggles and be successful in their relationships. Its a noble premise, but the movie devolves into female characters just seeing an iota of good in their male partners and running back to their married lives. One of the characters is a marriage counselor who at the climax would agree to fight with her husband, check his phone and force him to come home early though she herself doesn't want to (cringgggge). The other 2 male characters (first wanted his wife to lose weight and thoroughly body shamed her, and the second went above and beyond to prove his wife was an imbecile so that he could be the alpha) also had their wives running back to them at the end. The movie fails to recognize that a person's individuality and self esteem is not to be sacrificed for something conceptual as a happy married life. This is why in India we have so many unhappy couples. I wish our film makers would stop this nonsense at some point and actors would deny these roles. Until then, we will watch such movies and cringe.
Heart of Stone (2023)
Another poorly made spy movie
The movie starts abruptly with a spy operation where this tight knit group jokes around before starting an intense operation. The jokes, espionage and action that follows are so poorly written, I ended up not caring about Gal Gadot and her team from the get go. It is followed by a chase scene in Lisbon which was surprisingly decent. Then comes a boring double cross, hacking by typing random stuff really fast or plugging in thumb drives, more poor action and a fall flat on your face climax. Gal Gadot has done similar supposedly high octane flop movies like red notice. It was disheartening to see Aalia debut in Hollywood with this movie. Her potential that shined in movies like Udta Punjab was nowhere to be seen in this. Overall, total waste of time.
Neelavelicham (2023)
Finally a decent portrayal of white saree clad ghost in modern times
We have been putting up with white saree clad ghosts who are always sad, singing and out to get their revenge in soulless movies for decades. Neelavelicham brings back the original white saree clad ghost. There is a back story which explains why she is what she is.
The protagonist's monologues addressing the ghost which he only half believes in is heart warming. Tovino brings to life the essence of Basheer. He is depressed from a recent break up, broke financially and still manages to crack jokes to himself. The master storyteller of Kerala was portrayed with lots of love and care.
Rima's Bhargavi is hated by most of the male characters in the movie. It beautifully paints the picture of a patriarchal society where a rebel young woman walked with her head held high. Her character arch and backstory were beautifully told.
Other actors like Roshan and Shine also did justice to their roles. The roles were portrayed a bit theatrically paying homage to the original. The recreation of songs was also well done. It has subtle differences from the original but the essence of the songs and the emotions are preserved. There are a few jump scares. Tovino's expressions when his character experiences the supernatural is the best thing with this movie. All blood drains from his face though he believes the ghost to be not malevolent is the best portrayal of human kind reacting to the concept of unknown.
In short, beautiful movie worth watching. Subtitles on Amazon Prime are decent, so non Keralites can enjoy it too.
Kantara (2022)
Brilliant movie, stolen music
Simply put, the movie is brilliant. Each and every character, be it Rishabh who we see from start to finish or a side character who has only a few minutes of screen presence, is meticulously crafted to be put together to form this beautiful movie. The creators of the movie tapped into the folklores of Tulunadu and Malabar that was till date only used in cheap horror flicks or indie movies. This is a novel viewing experience for cinephiles across the world.
But.. we cannot overlook the blatant plagiarism when it comes to music. The movie gained its pre release hype from the title track Varharoopam stolen from Thaikkydam Bridge's Navarasa (please search on YouTube) without even the decency of sharing the credit. Same treatment was given to Singara Siriye stolen from Sairat. With proper credits they could have competed with Naatu Naatu of original score in the Oscars. I will be more than happy to change my rating to a full 10 once the makers do the right thing.
RRR (Rise Roar Revolt) (2022)
Way too larger than life but beautiful execution
RRR is way too larger than life for a historic movie. We have our 2 protagonists beating up hundreds at a time and it always leaves a bad taste in my mouth. As an audience, I am not able to overlook this factor and give the movie anything greater than 6 stars.
Now that we have the negative out of the way, let's talk about the positives. Background score and the songs are pure gold and I am proud as an Indian for the accolades it amassed. What steals the show is the friendship of the 2 protagonists. The lengths they go for each other makes one ask if the brilliant director Rajamouli disguised the first gay couple in a mass movie under layers of action and bravado. The way the 2 steal glances of each other, touch and yearn for each other is nothing short of pure love. Its not practical to announce it in a period piece, hats off to the radical execution pulled off by Rajamouli and our heroes. I hope we get to see them come out of the closet in part 2.
Raangi (2022)
Normalizing terrorism, sexual harassment and Gaddaffi
I don't have a single good thing to say about this movie. The movie starts off hinting at female empowerment with Trisha exposing a cop who make lewd comments at her. Then she starts investigating a FB account which claims to be her niece & posts nude videos. I don't want to get into spoilers but from that point the movie takes a dive into absurdity.
Trisha asks her 16 year old niece to take off her clothes. Her intention was to confirm if the nude girl in the videos is her niece, but she gives no explanation to the little girl. She just yells at the girl to take off her clothes and watches the niece sob while undressing. How is this not RAPE? She is also totally cool with the actual perp behind the account who has a cringy sob story.
The movie goes ahead and evolves into a pseudo romance between an under age Libyan terrorist and Trisha who is pretending to be her niece. Again the background score and the story telling style is glorifying the romance instead of pointing out the obvious wrongs in an adult romancing a kid. The movie then has a character given a wise person aura glorify Colonel Gaddaffi. I can't believe Trisha did not do a single Google search on Gaddaffi before she acted in this movie. I watched the movie only because I thought a senior actor like Trisha would be acting in something sensible. She just lost all her credibility in my eyes.
Liger (2022)
The most unbearable movie of the year
All the main plot holes and rape culture celebration has been already called out in so many reviews. I would like to call out some lesser called out points that can still flop a movie by themselves:
1. Ananya Pandey: her character is unbearable. She believes the protagonist is an internet troll but falls in love with him the second she sees him fight. She gets kidnapped, but gets excited for a selfie with the kidnappers. She shames the hero so that he will get serious and work on his MMA goals, reminds me of my despicable teachers who used to beat us as kids for our own good. She and her gang talks like caricatures of bimbos in Hollywood comedies. I am sorry Ananya, but acting is not your thing.
2. Chunky Pandey: his character is so flamboyant that it beats some of the most stereotyped gay characters. He is so rich that he can fly a whole MMA club to US in charter but he does not pay back loans. He is cool with his daughter wandering Vegas strip when he owes money to criminal gangs. Most of what is wrong with his character is poor writing but sub par acting and a crappy accent makes it worse.
3. The Sanju character: he is the top contender for national MMA champion title, but he has no fighting scenes to attest his fighting skills. He is just painted as a villain who deserves a beating.
4. 'The' Vijay Devarakonda: 'The' superlative was part of the title scene. He has not earned it yet. He has continued his streak of choosing a misogynistic hero character.
5. US immigration: Chunkey Pandey's character has a guy in US embassy who gets Visas for Liger's team in a day. As an immigrant watching that from US, I felt like spitting on the screen. We wait months and years in line for the visa. This scene has no basis in fact.
6. Liger's dad was a fighter whose nick name was Lion. Liger gets his name because his dad was nicknamed Lion and his mother calls herself a Tigress. There isn't a single scene where this is justified. The temple scene proves she is dumb, her demanding free MMA training for her son proves she is needy and all scenes prove she is loud. None of them are characteristics of a Tiger. Ergo, the movie's name is BS.
7. Jokes: it will just suffice to say that they are very poor jokes
8. What boxing movie has no training montage? That could have been something watchable for a few mins.
9. The fights: street fights are shown in great detail but the actual MMA championship is shown few seconds each round.
Some of the actors and movie makers have recently spoken against the negative reviews and how it is effecting them. This movie is still in theaters and not in OTT yet. Which means all the negative reviews are from people who actually paid and watched this in a theater. There is no refund policy for a bad movie. And the makers and actors have already profited from our hard earned ticket money. This is an unavoidable repercussion for making a bad movie. Man/woman up and deal with it.
Jug Jugg Jeeyo (2022)
Trivialized everything that matters
Trivialized divorces, careers and life decisions in the name of cute family(?) emotions. Love can run out between people and relationships may need to end. This was written by some noob who never took a life decision and probably danced at their own wedding decided by someone.
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)
Crowded, in a bad way
The movie is crowded with universes and heros from individual universes. Very little time is given for building up the universes or its characters for the audience to build any empathy. Wanda's character seems bipolar, there is no other explanation to how she makes the most crucial decision at the climax.
Another movie with a ton of characters was Spiderman No Way Home. It was beautifully executed and you rooted for every character in it, both good and evil. Dr Strange somehow lacked that.
There are reviews saying this movie was dark, I do not agree. The fights were mostly magical disks and lights thrown around and some fell dead when it hit them. There are some exceptions, but nothing like DC's suicide squad or Peacemaker. I think Marvel could have done much better.
Marakkar: Lion of the Arabian Sea (2021)
Poor acting, poor making, doesn't deserve the best movie award
Below average everything: story, acting, direction, music, costumes, stunts. There are a few questions I have for the makers and the folks who thought this movie deserved best movie award by the government of India:
1. Why were the Portugese talking to each other in English with a 'senor' added to the sentences
2. The accent of the characters is so historically inaccurate for the period, everyone was talking in their natural accent. Why?
3. The same question for costumes. When I was a kid a few decades back, everyone was wearing a mundu. But the costumes of ladies in the court for the most part looked like a posh marriage function in 2000's. Male actors wore random stuff that seemed to have come from a drama company. It reminded me of Inoccent's costume collection from Ramji Rao Speaking 😂
4. A gentleman drops an F... YOU in the movie. Did the slang exist in 16th century? Kindly enlighten me.
5. Kalyani and Pranav are good looking star kids. But that's it, they are just good looking, not good actors. Their performances were very stale and emotions bland. Weren't they in the movie just their because of their parents.
6. Priyadarshan is one of the most respected movie makers of Malayalam and one of the greatest features of his movies is music. I still find myself humming songs from his old movies. How come he did not realize most of the songs in Marakkar had plagiarized music?? The intro music of Zamorin court sounded like a News jingle.
7. Why couldn't the makers spend some money to make stunts more convincing by making agile folks fight and have veterans like Mohanlal, Prabhu and Siddique just be wise commanders? This was a golden opportunity to showcase Kerala's kalaripayattu to the world rather than swing Mohanlal on ropes.
8. What was the criteria for giving this movie the best movie award of 2021? Just from Malayalam we got gems like Joji, Nayattu and The Great Indian Kitchen, what made this 'raja part' drama worthy of the award over other movies?
9. Finally who did the sets for the movie? Some of them looked like a kid's painting.
Meenakshi Sundareshwar (2021)
Stereotyped, awkward, patriarchal and much more, please read below
I am going to list down everything wrong with the movie:
1. The state of Tamil Nadu speaks the language of Tamil. Its extremely offensive to portray Tamilians using Hindi as their first language. Netflix needs to understand the politics of North India's push to make Hindi the national language and South India's fight against it, it has been going on for half a decade.
2. All the rooms in Tamil Nadu are lit up in a sepia tint, even software companies. Also all ladies in Tamil Nadu wears traditional with flowers in the hair. Even interviewers in software companies. Height of stereotyping by Johar and party.
3. This is a celebration of the arranged marriage culture. The boy's family end up going to the wrong girl's house, they are trying to leave when they realized their mistake. But an old uncle blows a conch shell and announces the marriage is fixed. Everyone is happy, nobody bothered to ask the couple for consent.
4. Seems a large family does not understand young couples have sex, everyone walks into bedroom and a cute music is played. What is cute about sex illiteracy?
5. The patriarch (boy's dad) announces decisions all through the movie, everyone falls in line, it's considered normal apparently.
6. The boy gets a job at a company where they employs only bachelors. Seems girlfriends are also not allowed. Apparently this is also normal according to the makers of this movie.
7. The protagonist has the brilliant idea of sharing a quarter whiskey between 3 people by making each take a small sip, look at the stars and shake their torso. Have been drinking for a good long time, its news to me.
Beyond this I stopped paying attention and started playing with my phone. I am sure I missed a lot of juicy bits.
Sardar Udham (2021)
Powerful movie, great direction, soulful acting
A slow burning yet so powerful story telling. The movie tells the tale of a man's pain and his road to justice. The road is long, slow, meticulous and painful. A lesser human would have given up and started looking for normalcy in their life.
Makers of the movie did great justice to the tale by not adding any usual bollywood elements of dancing and singing and absurd fight scenes. Vicky was fantastic in the role as Udham Singh.
For the reviewers who are giving a 1 star review complaining about the movie being slow, its a true story that spanned decades. You cannot pace it up by adding cheap thrills and still do justice to what really happened. We need to appreciate true history in our art, otherwise everything is going to become Bal Narendra tales down the line.
Thalaivi (2021)
An ad film to launch Kankana into politics
Aravind Swamy as MGR was great. That's it, tgat was the only good thing about the movie.
The movie like Manikarnika is an attempt to launch Kankana into her political career. The first half talks about Jayalalitha's life as an actress and her affair with MGR. Since this doesn't do much for Kankana's political career, it is executed as a chore and is extremely boring to watch. The second half where she becomes Thalaivi you can see a little more heart in the effort. But the propaganda of the lead actress is so evident I could not look past it into the movie.
Lastly, Jaya was a great leader but she was corrupted too, I grew up watching news of the raid of her house where luxury goods were stashed. We have a duty to the nation and next generation to be truthful in political biopics so that yesterday's mistakes are not repeated. It's irresponsible of Amazon and Netflix to air a movie filled with propaganda.
Bellbottom (2021)
Non factual, propaganda
Non factual, propaganda. The timing of the movie coinciding with farmers protest cannot be overlooked. Also, the movie is from Akshay Kumar. A Canadian citizen who is a propaganda engine for ruling party in India. A huge gap in the storyline is missing to mention K Subramaniam, an Indian govt official who was present in the flight during the hijack and that it was UAE authorities who took the hijackers in custody and extradited to India later. The movie needs to be fact-checked and banned.
Indoo Ki Jawani (2020)
Its a funny movie, don't overthink it
Loved Kiara and Mallika's comedy combo. Its just a funny movie, a lot of critics are dissecting it like a Nolan movie. Plus all the hate from the moral police and Pakistan haters. Watch it if tou like some adult comedy and have couple of hours to kill. Don't watch if you are super sanskari or if you hate India Pakistan diplomacy.
The Great Indian Kitchen (2021)
Must watch
Unfortunately this is still reality in many Indian households. Ignorance is celebrated as tradition and menstural cycle is viewed through medieval eyes. Nimisha and Suraaj are delightful in their roles. How much I hated Suraaj's character by the movie's end is a testimony to his skill.
Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)
Does not live up to the hype
Poor graphics, poor storyline and pretty poor acting from everyone except Pascal. I wish DC goes back to the days of Nolan's batman or picks up from where the Joker ended.
Nishabdham (2020)
Poor acting, poor making, zero research
Did not expect a movie with Madhavan and Michael Madsen to fall so flat in acting. Poor research too, there was a dude photographing tigers in a jungle in Seattle in the movie 🙄