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the chef
Reviews
Last Call with Carson Daly (2002)
Carson tries his best, but it's just not enough
I had no bias against Carson when I saw this show for the first time; I had watched TRL maybe twice ever and hadn't formed any opinions about its photogenic host. So I hope no one will think I'm prejudiced in saying that Carson lacks the necessary charisma and wit necessary to be an engaging talk show host. The monologues are mercifully short, and the interviews are just mind-numbing. Worst, whenever Carson inserts a bland line of filler, you just know that Leno or Conan would be saying something brilliant and hilarious. To his credit, he's completely sincere and doesn't display any ego during the show. But sincere people are easy to find... they don't deserve my 1:30-2:30.
Halloween: Resurrection (2002)
weak
*mild spoilers*
They're really beating a dead horse with this series. I'm a huge Halloween fan, and I don't remember ever expecting so much from a movie and getting so little. I liked H20 a lot, and I thought it provided a very satisfying and logical conclusion to the series. So when we're told right away that it wasn't really Michael who was beheaded at the end of H20 (it was, uh, a paramedic with the exact same size and build as Michael who swapped clothes with him, and apparently couldn't tell anyone because his voice box was crushed), I was left hoping against hope that the movie itself wasn't going to be as convoluted and stupid as its setup.
Of course, it was. The characters are all strictly cookie-cutter, with the majority of lines being completely gratuitous sound bytes (more on this later). There are several stupid and obvious references to the first movie (e.g. bedroom closet door being smashed from the outside as girl cowers inside, MM pinning guy to kitchen wall with knives, MM sitting up creepily in the background as the camera focuses on the foreground), which only shows a lack of creativeness on the part of the filmmakers. Perhaps worst of all, virtually all of the killings are unimaginative, garden-variety stabbings/impalings that we've seen hundreds of times in hundreds of better movies. The other weak Halloween sequels could at least innovatively satisfy a general desire for gore. Next, although I don't know a great deal about filmmaking, I could see some poor editing going on here. At one point we're shown Michael lurking in the shadows, and the tip of his knife is stained with blood. This is before Michael has used the knife on anybody (the knife he uses in the beginning of the movie is clearly disposed of). Really not good. Finally, I don't know what other people thought of this, but I thought the concept of the movie was pretty condescending. I can completely imagine someone saying "Hey, since everyone's using the internet now, we'll tack this 'webcam' twist onto this classic horror series, and everyone will think it's really modern and edgy and want to see it!" This is augmented by a lot of really stupid and unnecessary technological references and gimmicks (communicating on the palmpilot, etc.). I could be overreacting here, but the whole attempt to "adapt the Halloween series to fit the 21st century" strikes me as really ill-conceived.
Last thing: I don't understand the impetus to keep casting rappers in action/horror movies. Save one funny scene where he dresses up as MM and rants, watching Busta Rhymes was painful. The talent he showed in Finding Forrester was drowned completely in an atrocious script. Choice lines of his include: As Michael apparently gets his in the end, Busta shouts "Happy Halloween, Mikey!" (or maybe it was "Happy Halloween, MOTHA****A!"... I can't remember exactly) in the most dramatic voice possible. Then, in an apparent attempt by the writers to lend "street cred" to the movie, Busta exclaims "Damn! That looks like some fried chicken-ass shit!" or something like that upon seeing MM's body. I'm reminded of LL Cool J in Deep Blue Sea or to a lesser extent Dr. Dre in Training Day. These guys aren't bad actors, they're just getting stuck with terrible lines that the writers think are "cool."
Anyway, please skip this movie whether you're a series fan or not, as it degrades all of the good Halloween movies that have been made. It's very disheartening that instead of ending the series on a high note and preserving its reputation among horror movies, it was decided to milk the formula for more money. We can only hope there's no Halloween 9, although this movie appropriately ends on the biggest unkillable-monster horror movie cliche of all time, leaving us dreading what they're going to come up with next to mangle this once-great idea.
P.S. Apologies if I made any factual mistakes in this... I saw the movie earlier today and don't remember every little detail, but I'm pretty sure it's all right.
Family Guy (1999)
much better than the simpsons or anything else
I have never seen a funnier or smarter show on TV. The absolute comedic gems in "The Simpsons" that come along at best once every few episodes are churned out with amazing regularity on "Family Guy". Every time I see a new episode, I pick up on another brilliant subtlety. The humor plays on things that you've always known are funny in the back of your mind, but have never explicitly thought of. "The Simpsons" and "South Park" are intelligent, often on or near the level of "Family Guy," but they both pull too many punches with the jokes (less so with "South Park," but its humor is more disturbing), and as a result don't inspire as many debilitating laughs. "Family Guy" is the perfect balance of raw humor and wry, subtle references. There has never been a better animated comedy on TV.
Local Hero (1983)
really great - my favorite movie
I don't have much to say about Local Hero that hasn't already been said, so I guess I'll just echo that it's a really awesome movie that's been #1 on my list for a long time. Victor singing at the celidh has to be one of the funniest moments ever on film. It frustrates me that so few people have heard of this wonderful movie.