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alancitolee
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Reviews
Dune (2021)
Because it's boring
I think, perhaps it's hard for a 50+ year old man to review to rate a film that is a cert 12.
The storyline and concepts may be engaging for teenage boys but they aren't to me. Nothing happens for at least an hour. Even after that there is no build up of suspense, action scenes are built on Hollywood clichés a lot of the time. There is a lot of narrative but little storytelling: for example, where are the central characters trying to get to? And what are the obstacles that they have to overcome? At the end of the film I didn't know.
Paul appears to be the chosen one. Chosen for what though? After 2 1/2 hours I don't know.
What is the point of the hand to hand combat scenes? Why would you rain down bombs on a city and then run along with little sword type things. Just shoot people with bullets, lazers or whatever. Well, at least one expects these scenes to be entertaining or surprising. They are not.
I don't know if Frank Herbert copied off Star Wars or vice versa but there are quite a lot of parallels. They seem to reflect obsessions of end 60s to early 80s: telekinesis, ESP, being a Native American and talking in a daft language no one understands, being a Kung Fu hero from mystical China or JAPAN!!! These days everybody knows where Japan is.
I think part of the problem is that the film takes itself too seriously and there is no low character plot like in Star Wars: R2D2, C3P0. Or weird little alien creatures running around. Ewoks.
The story does redeem itself in the last 20 mins or so with the mortal battle between the kid and the desert chap then joining the Fremen. But it's still hard to understand who the real baddies are and what the point of this imaginary world is.
Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre (2023)
Confused
I found this film confusing: is this a parody of a bad film or just a bad film? If it's a bad film, why isn't it one of those bad films you find yourself liking anyway?
I think it's the script that makes it particularly cardboard and flat. But the writing isn't quite bad enough to make you laugh at it. It just makes you wonder, "what was the point of that"? Or,"did I just miss something"?
Yes, the action seems to speed up towards the end and the movement from tasty setting to tasty setting provides a little entertainment towards the end. And yes, we did make it to the end.
If it was comedy: I didn't find many of the spoken or visual jokes funny. Hugh Grant did lend some comic interest, but it wasn't consistent, so again for most of the film I didn't know if I was meant to laugh or not.
Was the action meant to be a James Bondy or A Team? Lots of footsoldiers of the baddies getting wasted. But it felt a bit like they were just spreading margarine. " and another, up the stairs and another."
So I'm not really sure what to say, apart from I enjoyed one or two parts and it petered out at the end like a wet barbacue.
Avatar: The Way of Water (2022)
Incredible cinematic visuals and effects. Pointless.
Not sure my review is going to say much new.
Fantastic visual experience. It does pull you in and you forget that what you are looking at is not real but art. I never would have believed this was possible back in 1990 or something.
It is aimed at children and nerds I think. It is jam packed with Hollywood clichés... Which I think is part of the humour. The story itself is so predictable it becomes a kind of joke. The children disobey the adults and go get themselves into trouble some 4 or 5 times... why do tribes people from Pandora Wagammama and ancient Nigeria all show their hostility by showing their teeth and hissing like a cat... then there is the war cry where they all waggle their tongues and go "ak ak ak ak". Sonically, sound effects these days are identical to sound effects from 1992. Why is that? All explosions sound exactly the same.
It is fantastic, harmless entertainment. The whole point of the story is to give cue to battle and discovery scenes that are pretty trite and formulaic: hold the child hostage is a waste of time cos I am so slow in pulling the trigger that I might as well have committed hari kiri in minute 12 of the film.
But one cannot help but marvel at the incredible artistic, visual achievements. Would I watch it again? If you strapped me to a chair and held my eyelids open with match sticks.
Mrs. Harris Goes to Paris (2022)
A moving, meaningful modern fairy tale
I think it hits the mark with regards to the certificate and audience it is aimed at. It is the sort of film that will make a large and positive impact on younger and family audiences. The kind of film you remember when you were a child, walking out of feeling you were floating and surrounded by magic.
People here have pointed out that it is a fairy tale with a moral, rather than being historical.
The action of the film centres on two Dior dresses. As such these two dresses come to represent the aspirations of normal every day people to a higher, better and more beautiful life.
The issues it deals with are universal: the division between the powerful and the poor, the cruelty and grief of war, the beauty of culture, true love. But they are done in a way perfect to the intended audience.
The heroine is adorable and noble. It treats French culture of the time respectfully and meaningfully: existentialism, communism, fashion, aesthetics, language etc. So it is educational also.
The ending is suitable to the audience. The film moved me a man of 50, as it will move many people of all ages.
Paris has become the city we all would like to live in.
Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle (2017)
Worth finding out
I haven't seen the original so I was curious.
I think it hits the mark for the age range it's aimed at. I am 49 and sat down with Mum and Dad and enjoyed it.
I think the concept of gaming draws me in because i remember the history of games since i was a teen. It was 8 bit, dodgy little sprites, good tunes and excellent game play. Very basic compared to now
The character development, humour and teeny romance is good enough.
The only thing is that the level of mystery, intrigue and suspence is minimal. There is little depth to the story. I think someone pointed out that the development of the bad guy is pretty thin. CGI is per usual too much and not good enough to grab imagination. This flattens everything for me most of the time.
But funny and entertaining. Interesting characters. Plenty of dramatic clichés from Hollywood's store: "gee, you were ace... Oh really, thanks...". But i got into the romance and it's good light entertainment.
Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)
Eh?
Usually a film is written for 8 year old boys, there's something to hook adults in.
Some of the fight scenes like the one on the bridge were quite impressive but otherwise ... Nothing of interest.
House of Gucci (2021)
Good
It was engaging, realistic and had a good deal of depth. Maybe one of the few downsides was Paolo's character which was overracted, for me. It caused to young women in front of me to laugh out loud at various stages during the film. I think Al Pacino didn't overact for a change and the two title performances were tip top.
Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (2011)
More fun grabbing a man by the balls
Sqeezing real hard, sticking a gun against his head and telling him to sing an Abba song.
Utter rot.
Spoilers? Hahahaha.