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Lying Eyes (1996)
Typical Lifetime..with a twist!!
Listen, I unapologetically love Lifetime garbage movies. My sister and I used to watch them after school and laugh at how nuts they were. I have to say though, the twist in this one genuinely got me! I was not expecting it at all which is pretty rare for a Lifetime flick.
It's too bad that Cassidy Rae left acting because she was really good in this and would've had a great career. The drama is fun and Vincent Irizarry is perfect as manipulative sleazebag Derek. The acting and suspense were good enough that at times it didn't even feel like a straight-to-tv movie. The drama was super fun and worth a lazy Sunday watch.
Follow Her (2022)
Surprisingly great
It's hard to find a genuinely good indie film sometimes, but Follow Her was a great time. Incredibly well-acted by both leads, and is perfectly tailored for the millennials and gen zs.
Takes some crazy twists and the ending is nuts.
Makes some good points about personal privacy in the Information Age where everyone is filmed at all times and people live their lives for the likes.
Creepy and suspenseful and at times incredibly funny.
Honestly I would've paid to see this in theatres it was way higher in quality than typical indie films. The ending was ambiguous which is my favourite kind of ending. WATCH IT.
My Best Friend's Exorcism (2022)
Read the book instead
It's really too bad when a movie takes a great book and turns it into a joke. My Best Friends Exorcism (the book) was super fun, and genuinely scary in some scenes, but they changed they made to the movie all but ruined it. The only good thing was that Gretchen was well cast and well-acted.
I don't know what it is with Hollywood using sexuality as a plot point. They didn't need to make Glee a lesbian so they could mock her and use slurs, that's just lazy writing and completely offensive. So much of the actual horror of the story was made into a joke. I only wish I could go back in time and not watch this so I could have just the book in my head.
Grimcutty (2022)
Beyond stupid
The creature is kind of creepy looking (I think this whole thing was based on that Momo meme), but everything else about this was exceptionally stupid. The acting was atrocious, the script was garbage and a half and the premise was thinner than paper. Nothing made any sense and no one in the situation acted in any way rationally. I genuinely don't know what the message was supposed to be: that phones are bad? That parents will overreact to everything and that's what the real danger is? Like I said, it makes no sense.
The only character in this that I had any sympathy for was the little brother.
I seriously regret every second I spent watching this trash.
Excess Flesh (2015)
Accurate but awkward
I think I'm other writers' hands this could be really good. The story is there and the metaphor is strong, but the script is garbage and awkward.
The filming style, while visceral and gross, is perfectly suited to the subject matter. Maybe having this be a horror movie pushed it too far out of the mainstream.
I can tell you from experience that this is an insanely accurate portrait of the realities of an eating disorder. I've seen just about every movie out there that deals with EDs and NONE have ever come as close as this to showing what it's really like. It very much is like having a second person inside you that you despise and that despises you right back. It's not glamorous, it's gross and sad and a hell of your own making.
I wish this was made by a more mainstream director etc because the message is important.
The Boy (2016)
Finally something new
As a horror junky I've seen probably hundreds of horror films, and so it takes quite a bit to surprise me. The Boy managed to do just that. It's hard to make a twist both shocking and seamless without ruining the mood of the film but The Boy did it pretty perfectly. When it got to that moment (and you'll know what I'm talking about if you see it) I actually had my mouth hanging open. My biggest regret is that I didn't see it in the theatre because I thought it looked stupid. I was wrong.
It's easy for writers/directors to cop out and use tired horror tropes to pad a weak movie but The Boy is finally something new. Hopefully you've avoided any spoilers up to this point, so if you have, go watch it!
Brahms: The Boy II (2020)
Cash grab and nothing more
The Boy had one of the best twists in recent horror history, and they follow it up with this garbage? Another "house wife is haunted and husband thinks she's crazy until he doesn't" movie with a creepy haunted doll and a creepy kid who talks to it. I like Katie Holmes but this was nothing but a pathetic cash grab. Like the Conjuring universe movies, it relies entirely on tired 2000s-era horror tropes and "jump scares" that only made me wince with how cringey they were. The only thing that made it any better than Annabelle was that at least it didn't have the same ridiculous religious propaganda and glorification of the Warrens (who were actually well-known grifters that profited off the pain of others).
At least the director somewhat redeemed himself with Separation, which I thought was pretty decent.
Deep Blue Sea 3 (2020)
A huge improvement from the second
While nothing will ever be as iconic as the original, this was a huge improvement over the terrible second film. I actually found this one super fun and entertaining, with some good kills and intense moments. This obviously is definitely due to a boosted budget and better writing. If you're a shark movie fan this is a must-see!
Dashcam (2021)
Had potential
This could've been a great horror if the main character wasn't the most abhorrent piece of human garbage I've ever witnessed. All I wanted was for her to die a horrible death.
Men (2022)
Sinister and strange
This is definitely horror as art. The first hour and 15 minutes is a gorgeously shot, slow burn of terror and "wrongness". The last half hour is some of the most truly disturbing nonsense I've ever seen in my life. I'm not 100% sure on the meaning, but it will damn well stick with me.
Jeffrey (1995)
Diamond in the rough
This is such a hidden gem of a movie. It's so funny and cute and Steven Weber is one of the most underrated actors out there (and I'm not just saying that because I'm a simp for him).
However, it is also a very real portrayal of the devastation of the AIDS crisis and the struggles that the gay community faces.
The cast is amazing and well worth a watch. I hope it get remade one day because it's a great story.
Malignant (2021)
What??
I really don't know how to feel about this one. Like I wouldn't call it a horror (although it definitely has horror moments). It's more like a mash-up of 80s slasher and monster movies mixed with the weird cinematography and music of Wan's other films. The fight scenes with Gabriel were pretty nuts I'll admit and those parts were fun but I think I was just expecting something completely different so I felt disappointed after. The dialogue was also atrociously written, like a teenager wrote it.
The Dead Don't Die (2019)
Didn't need to be made
I don't know how Jim Jarmusch managed to make a boring zombie movie but here it is. It seemed like he was trying to make something that Sean of the Dead already perfected. The only mildly interesting character was Tilda Swinton.