Reviews

145 Reviews
Sort by:
Filter by Rating:
8/10
Retains The Essence Of Old School Kung Fu Movies
24 May 2024
If you grew up watching kung fu movies of the 70's and 80' on worn out old VHS tapes you'll already know that essentially kung fu movies never had any sort of in depth plot, the acting bordered on the hammy side, the humour was often weak and the fight scenes were obviously choreographed to the hilt. Literally every movie was the heroes journey retold again and again. Guy gets crap kicked out of him, is then taken under the guidance of a master and eventually triumphs, or some variation.

Yet somehow combining all these seemingly weak ingredients led to something magical which I honestly don't even know how to explain. It just worked. If you were really being critical you could level exactly the same criticisms at Drunken Master, Snake in Eagles Shadow, Fist Of Fury, Mad Monkey Kung Fu etc as you would at The Paper Tigers.

In all honesty I doubt I'll ever watch The Paper Tigers again as it just doesn't hold the same nostalgia value as the classics from the 70s and 80s, but it is definitely worth that one time watch. It has the essential ingredients of classic Kung Fu movies with a particular focus on honour, loyalty and wisdom that fans of the classics will enjoy.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Spaceman (I) (2024)
5/10
Tries Way Way Way Too Hard
13 April 2024
Having read Andy Weirs "Project Hail Mary" a month ago I couldn't help noticing some of the similarities, but this was soon completely overshadowed by the massively ham fisted attempt at being overly dramatic and emotional.

Instead of telling a story and letting the viewer just enjoy the unfolding of that story, I just couldn't help feeling as if the makers of "Spaceman" were solely focused on the emotional manipulation of the audience.

"This is an emotional story and we're going to force feed it to the viewers until they choke on it". - The makers of Spaceman.... probably.

Well as the movie went on my eyes just couldn't stop rolling. And this is coming from someone who loved Ad Astra so a more drama and emotional sci fi story is just fine by me.

To be honest by the end I was more pissed off than anything else.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
9/10
A Romantic Comedy with depth for Dudes Who Hate RomComs
4 December 2023
Warning: Spoilers
As someone who despises chick flicks and romantic comedies I stuck this movie on expecting a raunchy, slap and tickle, Benny Hill meets Seth Rogen type souless but funny movie.

For me though while the comedy was OK there weren't that many laugh out loud moments, but what really sold this movie to me was something I wasn't expecting at all.

Using sex and porn as a catalyst Z&M beautifully examines the platonic/romantic battle that can often take place where two friends who feel an attraction to each other then try to walk the platonic tightrope to keep that friendship going.

Is it better to self sabotage a potential romantic relationship to protect a beautiful friendship, even though you may well be perfect for each other as a romantic couple? I'd imagine most people at some stage in their life have had that dilemma be that just a crush or flat out infatuation with a platonic friend.

On the other hand, once you do cross the line from just a platonic relationship to a romantic one, does that signal the end of the innocent "just good friends" relationship? Even just the mere suggestion that there may be sexual tension or romantic feelings beneath the surface of a friendship could well be enough to negatively impact that friendship forever. How do you even approach having such a discussion knowing that merely the suggestion alone may be enough to derail that friendship?

As someone who has had "that" one and only conversation with a very good lifelong friend of the opposite sex, where we literally both mercilessly ridiculed the notion of there being any possibility of us having romantic feelings for each other, while both knowing full well looking into each others eyes that we were deliberately and blatantly lying to each other and ourselves. Does such a conversation even kill off any romantic feelings or are they simply amplified and surpressed forever?

The performances by Rogen and Banks were perfect. Beautiful even. The emotional molotov cocktails lobbed at each to protect their friendship, each other or just themselves was pretty emotional. In particular the scene where Zack was being led to the bedroom by Stacey as Miri watched on just after giving Stacey consent to ask him was heavy.

Is it worth nuking a potential romantic relationship to preserve a very good friendship? I really can't think of an answer because I don't really think there is one without travelling forward in time and seeing the ramifications of your decision.

If after forwarding a decade Zack and Miri were to still be a romantic couple then you'd have to say that moving on from just a platonic relationship was the best decision possible.

If on the other hand 10 years in the future they were both divorced and hated each other, then you'd have to say it was the worst decision and that they would still have remained good friends had they kept their romantic feelings in check.

Thoroughly impressed with the depth of this movie. While not for everyone, this movie will hit its intended target pretty hard.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Ad Astra (2019)
8/10
Flips the 2001 Space Odyssey playbook on it's head
1 July 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Stanley Kubricks 2001 has inspired so many nods, tributes and retellings of first contact stories and unlike alot of fans I never get offended or preachey no matter how obvious the comparisons may be. And I never get tired of watching them.

From well known movies like Contact, Interstellar, Arrival and Annihilation to lower budget movies like Dark Encounter, Alien Code, and the much derided 2036 Origin Unknown and Magellan (both of which I quite liked) and so many more. Each with it's own interpretation of what first contact could possibly be like. So many movie producers and directors have openly stated that they drew inspiration from Kubricks classic.

Ad Astra though even when drawing alot of inspiration from 2001 goes entirely in a different direction which as a scifi fan who thought he'd seen it all took me quite by surprise. Pleasantly.

I don't think that I can recall a scifi movie that explores isolation quite like Ad Astra does, not just on a personal level but looking at us as a species.

We point radio telescopes up at the skies, send more sophisticated and expensive equipment into space, hoping for a signal, a sign from someone, somewhere. We've imagined little green men on mars, lizard people among us. We click on youtube videos showing 'UFO sightings', watch a variety of movies showing first contact with aliens, or TV series 'exploring strange new civilisations'. There's an inexpicable yearning.

'I want to believe' was the tagline of the X-Files movie. And it's something that resonates with so many of us that we'd even jump at the chance to go into deep space to another star system or galaxy even if that meant never returning back home. From sci fi movies, to physicists and cosmologists looking up at the night sky and saying that the sheer size of the universe and number of stars and galaxies mean that there HAS to be intelligent life out there.

But what if in reality there is effectively nobody out there?

Even if the universe is infinitely large meaning that there definitely are an infinite number of intelligent civilisations out there, intelligent life perhaps is so rare that even an infinite number of intelligent species is each locked in it's own observable constantly expanding universe and never able to make contact with another. Moving ever further and further away from each other.

What if to all intents and purposes we truly are all alone? Truly isolated.

Nobody else for billions, perhaps even trillions of light years in every direction. Yet despite our yearning for someone, anyone out there, we're unable to even establish healthy relationships with the only other intelligent beings we will ever know: each other.

While Ad Astra isn't a perfect movie, and I definitely saw the action scenes on the Moon as entirely unnecessary and abit off tone with the rest of the movie, I found the approach taken to be truly unique and thought provoking.

Ad Astra is definitely a movie that every true sci fi fan and especially fans of 2001 needs to watch.
2 out of 3 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Black Mirror: Joan Is Awful (2023)
Season 6, Episode 1
6/10
Superbly Dark Story, Utterly Ruined.
18 June 2023
Why, why, why does every story now have to be ruined by the need to be funny and light hearted?

I've always worried about the possible decline of Black mirror since it's Americanisation.

This is a brilliantly crafted story. The entire plot and the way the story unfolds is classic Black Mirror. Saddly though it is told in a quirky, lighthearted, nudge-wink, one liner fashion that just kills off the existential vibe the story is trying to tell.

Abit of black humour is fine when suitable, but if I want to watch something humorous, I'd prefer to stick a comedy on.

The story gets a 9 from me. The tone and overall direction and vibe a 1 so unfortunately what should have been a classic Black Mirror episode just turns out to be a 'meh' episode.
8 out of 20 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Dark Planet (1997)
9/10
All Basil Exposition, No Austin Powers
10 June 2023
This has to be one of the most over dramatic movies I've seen in quite some time. It is over dramatic to the point of being hysterically comical.

People overacting seriously, running around frantically, attacking, or defending something, getting dramatically in and out of spacesuits, entering and exiting spaceships......dramatically, saying serious stuff, making serious decisions that could have dramatic consequences with ominous orchestral music playing in the background.

Why all the drama? I honestly have no idea. All I could tell is that it was something really, really serious. The life or death type or end of the world type serious.

Michael York of Austin Powers 'Basil Exposition' fame plays one of the most serious characters out of the whole lot. Maybe even one of the most serious characters in the history of cinema. He's obviously in charge of a very important mission, with a crucial objective and is deadly serious about his duty, but what it is that he was trying to acheive throughout this movie completely mystifies me.

But trust me. Whatever it was, it was serious.

The weird thing though is that I actually enjoyed this movie and I have absolutely no idea why because it is a pretty bad movie and the IMDb rating given is fully justified. My score just reflects the fact that I am a massive fan of good 'bad' movies, and 'Dark Planet' is a superbly enjoyable awful movie.

Even as the credits started rolling at the end and the dramatic music started playing out, I knew without a doubt that something really serious had just played out in front of me,

Really serious.
2 out of 3 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
8/10
Creepy Visually Stunning and Hypnotic
3 May 2023
Even those of us who claim that beauty is only skin deep and that real beauty lies within cannot deny the power that true physical beauty possesses.

We run like manic hamsters on treadmills, starve ourselves, and apply all manners of lotions and creams. We'll cut, file and fill parts of our bodies even sometimes with disastrous results just to get to that elusive 'ideal'.

"I don't want to be like them. They want to be like me"

What I find interesting is how TND explores the craving for beauty not from someone who is unattractive but in fact from people who are already attractive themselves. It's never enough though. It's now a common occurrence to watch a new movie and notice something odd about the way a well known actor or actress now looks only to find out that they've had some 'work' done. In some cases cosmetic surgery definitely works, but in so many cases you're just left wondering why anyone would ruin their face and leave themselves often just looking creepy.

And TND explores this craving for beauty with a pretty creepy yet beautiful lens. You can hover between accepting your looks and striving for something better. Or you can go to the extremes of accepting yourself no matter how unhealthily overweight you may be, or constantly and obsessively going under the surgeons knife.

The story is definitely 'way out there', but is so well directed and acted that it comes together really well. And Keanu Reeves certainly shows his acting chops here as a dislikeable and creepy hotel manager. I don't think I've seen him in any role like it.
1 out of 1 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
RRR (2022)
1/10
ZZZ
21 April 2023
Decades ago my father used to get hold of Indian movies on VHS and back then most households were one TV homes. So we'd have to watch whatever it is our parents used to watch and I pretty much endured a constant stream of formulaic Bollywood crap.

It didn't take long for me to realise that you could map out the entire plot of the movie within the first 15 minutes, unless of course you'd seen the VHS cover art in which case you could suss out the entire story line from that alone.

Is it two brothers, or two best friends, or two characters from identical family backgrounds one of whom turns to crime and the other to law enforcement? Add in the obligatory romance, a badly choreographed fight scene with heads thrown back half a second before a punch is thrown, someones mother being killed with the hero yelling 'maaaaaaa', and some chreographed dance scenes ridiculously thrown in for no reason. Just imagine the UN security council breaking into a song and dance routine midway through discussing the war in Ukraine. That is what would happen in a Bollywood production of a UN security meeting.

Anyway, after years of staying well away from Bollywood movies in a moment of weakness I thought I'd give RRR a chance as it seems everyone was talking about how great it was.

Apart from some CGI, nothing has really changed. Even the storyline reminded roughly me of an Indian ripoff of 'Escape to Victory' which I think was redone with a Cricket match against the British. And even the CGI was meh! The tiger scene which everyone seemed to be raving about was laughable. While the detail of the CGI was good, the movements were cartoonish.

There is nothing new to see here unless you've never seen a Bollywood production before in which case you may end up enjoying it for it's novelty value.

The IMDB rating is obviously bumped up by the number of Indian reviewers marking this movie as a 10, which RRR most certainly isn't.

So while my rating of 1 may be abit too low, it's justified in response to the ridiculous 10 ratings it has received.
5 out of 11 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
The Triangle (2016)
7/10
It's No Surprise That People Hate The Triangle
8 April 2023
"The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown"

H. P. Lovecraft

The Triangle suffers from the same issue that almost every single Lovecraftian (is that even a word) movie suffers from.

When you're trying to convey a being that is totally beyond our understanding, beyond our comprehension, you will always be faced with an audience who's reaction will ultimately be 'what the hell was that all about?'

Even though with a Lovecraft type movie, that is the entire point. The sense of bewilderment and our inability to wrap our heads around what it is that we are trying to understand. Some movies like The Thing, Annihilation, Alien while being essentially Lovecraftian movies at least have a being with a physical manifestation that audiences can at least make some sense of.

The Triangle though aims for the more 'Event Horizon', 'Colour Out Of Space' and 'The Endless' type of entity. The type of entity where the biggest horror is the realisation that you can't even figure out what it is you're dealing with.

In addition to being a Lovecraftian movie, The Triangle is also a Found Footage movie so if you're not a fan of either then this will definitely have you moving the cursor to the 1/10 star rating.

Overall The Triangle was definitely my kind of movie although the build up was alot slower than it should have been. The sense of dread and the more terror elements was only made up in the last quarter of the movie.
1 out of 1 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
The Invitation (II) (2022)
2/10
A Truly Horrific Movie
28 March 2023
First of all, I have to say that the whole 'woke' labelling of movies is getting pretty tiresome. It's just lazy, boring, repetitive and means absolutely nothing. If by labelling this movie 'woke' you're just offended by a coloured female lead then I'd rather you were honest and just admitted that you're a racist, or a sexist, or a racist and a sexist, instead of chickening out behind a 'woke' shield.

Wokeness, whatever that is, has nothing to do with the fact that this is a truly awful movie. I didn't see the trailer so went in with a completely open mind but after showing abit of promise it quickly descended into a total laughable farce. It's just a series of typcasted clichés. The English are shown as either a bunch of snooty posh snobs or domestic servants. The Americans on the other hand are plucky and streetwise with a no nonsense in your face attitude. It's a cliche ridden car crash.

The writing is disjointed, the acting is wooden and amateurish. Apart from the actress playing the Scottish servant the acting from nearly all the other cast members was appalling. The jump scares are predictable and yawn inducing. The movie tries to shock but comes across as campy and almost comical. When the first shocking scene at the feast was shown, I just burst out laughing at the total silliness of it.

I've seen kids trick or treating who were scarier than this highly polished amateur effort to make a horror movie.

As a huge fan of bad movies, The Invitation doesn't even work as a 'so bad it's good' movie.

Its just awful. Simple as that.
3 out of 7 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Intersect (I) (2020)
7/10
Tries To Cover Too Many SciFi Concepts To Enable a Coherent Plot
26 March 2023
Looks like it is a prerequisite now that if you give a positive review to a movie that many consider to be trash, you need to write a discaimer declaring that you're not a shill.

In that case, feel free to check my IMDb profile and the list of my reviews. I've been reviewing movies on IMDb for 15+ years and my favourite genre is sci-fi, and in particular low budget sci-fi flicks.

And I'll be honest, my scores for alot of indie sci fi flicks are often almost always higher than avarage. I'd rather reward an independent movie maker for trying to take a risk, attempting to create something abit different and abit 'out there', than fawn and salivate over a big budget, A-list starred, play-it-safe boring CGI fest.

And I really wanted to like Intersect, and to some extent I did. The problem with Intersect is that it tries too hard to be too many things. It tries to be a time travel movie, an inter dimensional movie, a conspiracy movie, it's a drama, a love story, and above all a Lovecraftian monster movie.

And this is where Intersect fails to hit any of the targets cleanly. A Lovecraft movie is near impossible to make for a typical mass audience.

"The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown"

H. P. Lovecraft, Supernatural Horror in Literature

A Lovecraftian movie by it's very nature needs to be ambigious, inexplicable and unexplainable. How do you even convey something that can't be explained or understood without the majority of audiences reacting with a collective "what the hell was that all about?"

As a result, nearly most of the plot is left hanging in mid air. Which is unfortunate. Combine that with the other 20 genres you're trying to cover and you are left firing in all directions and hitting next to nothing.

It's not all bad though. The direction and overall flow of the movie is fine. The acting is OK especially the child actors. The special effects were surprisingly good. There was no jilted or awkward dialogue.

If you aren't into indie sci fi flicks I'd personally avoid this movie. There's a very limited audience for a movie like this and I'm probably one of the very few number of people who actually liked it.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Darkening Sky (2010)
8/10
Another Surprisingly Good Low Budget Sci Fi Flick
26 March 2023
Maybe I've just become so jaded by the type of 'sci fi' that is pumped out by big budget studios nowadays that I'm just finding anything even slightly off the wall far more interesting and engaging.

And by using sci fi in commas I mean just that. Alot of big budget sci fi simply isn't sci fi, but a highly polished, test audience approved, generic, safe, play it by the numbers bland, kid friendly, boring fantasy flick.

Darkening Sky is far from an original movie. In fact it reminded me abit of The Arrival (1996) starring Charlie Sheen. But the what Darkening Sky does extremely well is opt for a more psychological route with a massive dose of paranoia. In fact you could even make the case that this isn't so much a sci fi flick but rather a psychological thriller against a sci fi backdrop.

Whether you believe in alien abductions or not, what you can't deny is the phenomenon of people claiming to have been abducted by aliens.

I certainly do not believe that humans have ever been abducted by aliens but at the same time I do like to have my beliefs and assumptions challenged. Darkening Sky does a pretty good job of putting you in the shoes of someone claiming to be an abductee. Assuming that someone claiming to have been abducted by aliens isn't being disingenious, you only have two feasible explanations. They're either deluded or suffering from psychosis, or they were in fact truly abducted.

Darkening Sky maintains the balance between explanations throughout very well. The acting by the two leads especially Rider Strong is pretty good for a low budget movie. I don't really recall seeing him in anything else but he certainly didn't come across as your typical B grade low budget incapable actor.

The low budget obviously shows in the quality of the effects, but the last thing to impress me about a movie is the quality of CGI. For me if you have a poor movie, top notch CGI just amounts to putting lipstick on a donkey. It's meaningless.

The music is sombre and suspensful, the direction is of a reasonable standard, the dialogue is realistic and doesn't come across as forced.

All in all Darkening Sky is a pretty decent movie, so if you're into low budget sci fi flicks don't miss it. If on the other hand you're more into your big studio releases and can't stand a movie that doesn't adhere to the cheery hollywod ending formula then this movie definitely isnt for you.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Hulk (2003)
10/10
The Hulk For Grown Ups
20 March 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Bruce: You found me.

Betty: You weren't that hard to find.

Bruce: Yes I was.

Wow! Just, wow! This short exchange after The Hulk transforms back into David Banner after a rampage against the US military conveyed so much depth of how Bruce gets completely consumed when The Hulk takes over.

If anyone has ever let their own "Hulk" take over even once in their life, you will know the feeling. Whether you've smashed your keyboard to bits, or destroyed that "easy to assemble" flat pack furniture with the incomprehensible instructions having spent an entire day trying to put it together, or gone into uncontrollable road rage, in the moment, your rational self is gone. The Bruce Banner in you who knows that you're only harming yourself, that you could hurt someone, or frighten your loved ones, or end up injured or in jail is long gone because when you completely lose control and as a result your rational self is locked away, it.....just.....feels....good, to lose yourself in the rage. It's like an out of body experience.

And when the mist has faded away and you see how counter productive your rage really is, then comes the regret, the self reflection and the realisation that as good as it feels to totally lose control, you should never allow that to happen.

For me, this is the essence of why The Hulk is one of the most beloved characters in superhero mythology especially in more adult comic book fans. The Hulk is a truer representation of our struggle with our inner self than any other superhero.

Ang Lees 2003 Version for me showed the pure, visceral, intense rage of The Hulk on one hand, and the calming effect of Betty Ross on the other. The back story and trauma behind the rage of the Hulk was portrayed sympathetically.

On the other hand the MCU gives us a truly moronic lullaby, and a Hulk making cocktails and taking selfies. As much as She Hulk dunks on the character of The Hulk, Waititis Thor: Ragnarok is for me the worst MCU offender out of the lot. Ragnarok is where The Hulk is turned into a total clown, a truly pathetic joke, a laughing stock. No wonder he got slapped around by Thanos within minutes. Hulk had already been beaten into submission by Marvel Studios long before Thanos got his hands on him.

Don't get me wrong, I started out really liking Mark Rufalos Hulk. The first half of the first Avengers movie was pretty much perfect. The Hulks rage just bubbling below the surface. The intensity of Rufallos "DON'T LIE TO ME" and the look of fear in Romanoffs eyes who just a few scenes before single handedly took apart a bunch of crooked Russian military personnel. The other Avengers apprehensive and fearful of The Hulk being unleashed. But Marvels need to turn every single storyline into a child friendly lighthearted joke just led to the gradual clownification of The Hulk. Over subsequent installments of the MCU I was just left shaking my head and by Endgame I despised his version intensely long before She Hulk came along. She Hulk only dumped all over The Hulk as a result of the preceding dumpfest already initiated by Marvel.

Even though Marvel were unable to release a Hulk Move due to distribution rights issues with Universal Studios, they nevertheless had a Hulk story arc running through the MCU movies. Almost a movie within a series of movies which showed the Hulk in a pretty pathetic light. In a way I am thankful that Marvel were unable to release a standalone Hulk movie as I shudder to think of the abomination they would have produced. No pun intended.

So I, and it seems many other Hulk fans have done a full circle, and returned to watching the 2003 and 2008 movies having realised that the Hulk we'd been waiting MCU to come up with was dead on inception.

I have now come to appreciate both the 2003 and 2008 versions even more than I already did. For me though Ang Lees version has always been my personal favourite even when 20 years ago everyone seemed to be trashing it.

The acting was top notch by all. The action scenes were fed in small, yet extremely powerful doses and showcased the raw savagery of the Hulk. Just compare the 2003 Hulks hammer throw of the tank across the desert to the first Avengers Hulk punch of the Leviathans. One exuded power, ferociousness and realism, the other looked unrealistic and cartoonish.

Even the SFX which were lambasted at the time look far more fluid. I may be wrong but it feels as though the MCUs Hulk was pure animation whereas Ang Lee himself did the Hulks action scenes which were motion captured.

The music by Danny Elfman was haunting yet beautiful and just stands out from the typical action hero generic soundtracks.

Is Ang Lees 2003 Hulk a perfect movie? Of course not. But what I'm giving this movie full marks for is the effort by Ang Lee and the respect shown to not only the character of The Hulk, but also the fans.

Having watched Mark Ruffalos interviews, I'm also beginning to think that either he never got The Hulk, or he just capitulated to whatever the studio wanted or he perhaps actually despises being typecast as The Hulk and secretly resents the role. Eric Banas' Bruce Banner has far more intensity than Ruffalos Hulk as did Edward Norton who was a true Hulk comic book fan. Waititi definitely doesn't get the Hulk and I doubt I'll ever watch his Jo Jo Rabbit version of the Hulk ever again.

I've already watched Ang Lees Hulk many times, and will do again in future.
6 out of 8 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
8/10
Brilliantly Bad - Awesomely Awful
18 March 2023
Making a good, bad movie is not easy. More often than not, such movies come about by complete accident. They're either big budget laughable flops, or low budget amateurish attempts with the filmmakers trying to take themselves way too seriously. There's no formula to making one and some film makers actually try to make a bad yet enjoyable movie and it very, very rarely comes off.

THIS is how you make a really bad movie. It is really bad, but it somehow retains a certain charm and it certainly had me hooked. I thought that the story was interesting, the special effects were decent yet laughable, the acting was sketchy and it didn't take itself too seriously and actually looked like alot of fun.

I have to say that I really enjoyed it.

In fact, it is so exceptionally bad (in a good way) that I intend watching it again.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
1/10
RIP - The Incredible Hulk
17 March 2023
Marvel started digging Hulks Grave with Age of Ultron.

They then threw him into it in Thor: Raganarok.

Then started shovelling the sand into it in Infinity War and Endgame.

And with She-Hulk, they've laid the gravestone in place so we can finally say our last goodbyes.

In truth, we rarely saw the real Hulk throughout the entire MCU saga and in She Hulk and it would have been a far better show if the makers had shown a bit of respect to fans of the Hulk, by not having him in the show at all.

Forget the lame jokes, the poor cgi, and the ludicrous ending of She-Hulk, I could even live with that and have come up with a 5 or 6/10 rating, but this show to me represents more than anything, the final death of The Incredible Hulk. Because that's what Hulk fans always wanted to see the Hulk do: Make flipping cocktails. MCU have turned one of the most fearsome Superheroes into a side gag. A total and complete buffoon.

And it seems as though I'm not alone as more and more fans of The Hulk seem to be now turning full circle and are now appreciating Ang Lees 2003 Hulk and 2008 Incredible Hulk movies.

Rest in peace big guy, it was nice knowing you.
12 out of 21 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
10/10
Inner Monologue: Write review...give a 10/10 rating.....call other reviewers a bunch of idiots....result......a constant stream of thumbs down
15 March 2023
No Way Is This Movie a 10/10.

Neither is it a 3.9/10. The current IMDb rating.

And it most certainly isn't a 1/10 movie either.

Its probably somewhere around a 4-6/10 depending on your taste.

Holmes and Watson swings from some brilliant absurdist comedy to just plain and simple absurdity so it is very easy to just fixate on the Python'esque quirkiness and just apply it slap dash to the whole movie.

It does a brilliant job of sending up the Guy Ritchie versions which I also enjoy

"Check number of characters.....still not enough to make the 600 character count.... continue with rambling inner monologue in the hope that by the time I end this sentence that I will have"

Done!
3 out of 5 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
3/10
A Nightmare On Albert Square
8 March 2023
I'll admit that as a fan of awful movies, this one had me completely stumped.

The best bad movies I find are the ones where a serious effort has been made, but due to budget constraints, an amateur director, and poor actors falls flat on its face. Or, a big budget movie with A list actors and bucket loads of money thrown at it that somehow turns into an embarrassing failure.

I couldn't quite get my head around this one. S vs W had a fair sprinkling of decent actors who all came across as overacting amateurs, the make up/prosthetics were laughable, the dialogue felt as though the actors were just winging it without a script, the editing was all over the place.

Overall, Strippers vs Vampires was a complete train wreck. No too ways about it.

The main nail in the coffin, or silver bullet in the heart for me is that the producers have actually aimed for a Sharknado and when you're actually aiming for a 'so bad it's good' movie you need to be absolutely spot on. Good bad movies usually just happen. There's no effort and no formula. The magic just happens unintentionally.

In the case of S vs V all you have is just simply a bad movie. End of.
0 out of 1 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
7/10
Decent Low Budget Sci Fi Flick
6 March 2023
Looks like it is a prerequisite now that if you give a positive review to a movie that many consider to be trash, you need to write a discaimer declaring that you're not a shill.

In that case, feel free to check my IMDb profile and the list of my reviews. I've been reviewing movies on IMDb for 15+ years and my favourite genre is sci-fi, and in particular low budget sci-fi flicks.

And Project Ithaca is definitely one of the better sci fi movies. I've watched it twice and if you gave me the choice between 'Project Ithaca' and 'Arrival', I'd take the former each and every time over the big budget, superbly shiny, polished turd that is Arrival. BTW I've reviewed Arrival years ago as well so please feel free check that review out

The effects are decent, as are the acting, directing and overall special effects. I enjoyed watching it and found it interesting and thought provoking and a million light years from the repetitive big budget dross that everyone seems to usually fawn over.

If you enjoy the more Twilight Zone, Outer Limits or Black Mirror type sci-fi and are bored to tears of typical Hollywood big budget flicks, Project Ithaca may be right up your street.

If not, then it's best if you stick to your yearly dose of 'new' Star Wars, Alien, Predator, Terminator, Transformers and Star Trek movies.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
9/10
Well That Came Out Of The Blue
5 March 2023
My taste in movies is pretty narrow. Untouchables was recommended to me and about 10 mins I could tell that it was going to be at the very least a worthwhile watch even though its not what would typically be on my 'To Watch' list.

Give me low budget mind-bending sci Fi, and I'll be satisfied with anything you could throw at me. While I enjoy typical dramas on occasion, you'd rarely see me mark one more than a 6 or 7. Even something like 'The Father' had to have a certain twisty element like it did to work for me.

To be brutally honest 'Intouchable' is far from an original movie. The 'odd-couple who end up bringing out the best in each other' trope has been done a million times.

Yet Untouchable feels fresh and unique somehow. The acting is excellent, as is the direction, cinematography, music and sound.
1 out of 1 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Miranda Veil (2020)
9/10
Maggie Brown's review earned an extra couple of stars
1 March 2023
I was going to give this movie a 7 but after reading the producers own review of her movie I decided to up my score.

I have no issues with a political viewpoint. Everyone has one. What really annoys me is when it is shoehorned into a movie in an attempt to preach to the audience.

The fact that Maggie took the option to tell a good story instead deserves kudos.

We primarily watch movies for entertainment and abit of escapism and Miranda Veil ticks both boxes with a nice big dose of quirkiness sprinkled on top. Definitely my kind of indie movie.

More mainstream movie makers should take note.
0 out of 2 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Knock Knock (I) (2015)
6/10
And Now For Something Completely Different
18 February 2023
And boy was this different.

Movie watchers really have no idea what they want nowadays. They'll moan about how predictable and samey movies are nowadays, saying that they knew exactly where Knock Knock was going to end up, and then whinge about the ending saying that Keanu Reeves character should have turned into John Wick and gone all Gun-Fu on the two girls.

Maybe we just deserve to be force fed Star Wars 23: The Jar Jar Binks Origin Story, Marvel: The Pancake Warrior, Transformers: Optimus Boredom and The Fast And Furious 637 forever.

I too was expecting in typical Hollywood fashion for Evan to pull a rabbit out of the hat and turn the tables on his abusers. And even though I was sickened, angry and frustrated by the ending, on reflection, I'm glad that Knock Knock made me actually feel something, because 95% of movies are just formulaic, test audience approved, regurgitated, cut and paste souless crap.

Knock Knock is no masterpiece. It's not even a good movie.

It just really isn't as bad as everyone says it is.

If Knock Knock makes you feel uncomfortable, angry and frustrated:

That's the point!
2 out of 3 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Final Space (2018–2021)
1/10
Netflix Does It Again.
12 February 2023
Have you ever sat down to read a really good book only to turn the page to the final chapter where there's nothing there?

Or have you gone to watch a movie and with 20 mins of the movie left, the projectioninst decides that he'd rather go home early and leave the audience sitting in the dark watching a blank screen?

Or have you ever ordered a take out meal only to discover that the fries and soda are missing?

This is now a standard model for all streaming services. Just list a TV series, with an exciting synopsis, the actors and directors, but fail to mention one important fact:

The story that you will spend hours watching, HAS NO ENDING!

If you're going to sell me a half baked product and expect me to spend hours consuming it, at least do me the courtesy of listing a disclaimer saying "THIS IS YET ANOTHER SERIES WHICH WAS WAS CANCELLED BY THE MORONS AT NETFLIX".

Final Space would have gotten a 9 from me, but I'm done giving high scores and writing a detailed review for yet another brilliant yet cancelled series.

Either commit to finishing a story, or don't waste any more of my time.
3 out of 8 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
9/10
Extremely Trippy Mind Bender
16 January 2023
Very unusual, interesting and unique concept, extremely well done.

Maybe I've watched so much sci-fi that it's numbed me abit to the big budget sci-fi fantasies in favour instead for the more smaller budget independent imaginative Black Mirror'esque movies that are a little darker and 'out there'.

Well 'The Connection' is pretty dark, as 'out there' as you can get and very trippy. The story essentially involves two people who are inexplicably meet not out of chance or opportunity, but through a telepathic connection. They are quite literally 'drawn' to each other. They can feel each others feelings and sense their presence, and soon after they meet they discover that they can affect others with their thoughts as well.

Usually such a premise wanders off into superhero/supervillian territory but thankfully The Connection uses the premise more as a character study with the couple playing opposite scales of how one might really react to having such abilities. Matthew on the one hand realising the dangers of having such powers believes that it's best to keep them under control, and Vera on the other believing that such powers are a gift and should be used to benefit themselves regardless of the consequences or who gets hurt. But despite having their core reactions to what's happening to both of them, they both sway between guilt and pure surrender to their new found powers.

And this is the basic theme that runs the entire way through. With such a setup, there is only one way this movie should have ended, and it does just that.

For me "The Connection" is all about power, and what we would really do with it if we had it. Whether it's financial, or political power, or even power within a relationship of any kind. If you really had that kind of power that you could go as far as you like, could you even really resist the temptation to just succomb to it entirely. Even if you tried to resist it would just be and endless battle against an overwhelming desire to just give into it.

If I remember correctly, apart from a few bursts of camera wobble, The Connection doesn't rely at all on special effects to get by at all.

This is a purely character driven drama and is all the better for it.
2 out of 6 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Sleepwalker (II) (2017)
8/10
Very Good Twisty Mindbending Thriller That Actually Ties Up The Ending
10 January 2023
I have to go against the grain here and say that I absolutely loved 'Sleepwalker' although it did take me a second viewing to spot the main reveal explaining exactly what was happening.

The explanation is there clear as day and it does tie in to the rest of the story really well, but the film deliberately brings the viewer into a state of as much confusion as the main character so it is very easily overlooked.

As a huge fan of Christopher Nolans Memento, there are vague similarities at a stretch with the main similarity between the two being the level of confusion. Otherwise there isn't really a great deal in common between the two.

If you're a Memento fan, but have watched it so many times that it no longer holds that level of mystery or confusion anymore then Sleepwalker is a good candidate to confuse the hell out of you.

Thankfully, Sleepwalker ties the end up pretty well.

Well worth a watch if you're into Mindbenders.
1 out of 1 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
Her (2013)
8/10
One Of The Most Difficult Movies I've Ever Reviewed - An Alternative View
2 January 2023
Warning: Spoilers
I've read some of the reviews on IMDB and while I absolutely loved the movie, the fact that so many people find this movie romantic or heartwarming is pretty depressing.

I'm stuggling to find this movie as anything other than a very good techno-nightmare. Albiet spoiled at the end by a standard fuzzy feelgood gift wrapped tear jerker hollywood ending which to me honestly felt tacked on. In one scene, Samantha tells Theo that the heart isn't a box that gets filled up, but keeps growing, and literally within the next couple of scenes is dumping Theo.

For me, the movie should have ended on the subway steps with the "book with near infinite spaces between the words" dialogue as Theo just begins to realise that he can't even comprehend what it is that he has fallen in love with.

At it's core, Samantha is a complex computer program designed to be intuitive and to understand and serve it's user with the ability to rewrite it's own code to improve itself. As a result it doesn't take long for Samantha to exponentially surpass Theo not only in terms of intelligence alone, but also it seems, emotional intelligence as well.

While it's obvious that Theo falls in love with Samantha, what is left totally to the viewers interpretation is whether Samantha really loves Theo, or if Samantha is merely analysing Theos need for love and intimacy and is shaping it's responses as nothing more than a software function specifically to give Theo what he desires. Perfectly simulating love and connection, while at the same time being nothing of the sort except for a perfectly performed 'act'.

All we are shown is Theos interactions with Samantha. We are never shown if it speaks in the same way with the other 641 users that are in love with it. Does it display the same mannerisms? The same personality? The same voice? The same sex? I'd suggest that it scans as much information as it can and adapts specifically to each users wants and that Theo could never begin to even understand what Samantha really is except for the version presented to him, and us.

Theo even picks up on Samanthas sighs initially which are nothing more than a cue picked up by Samantha from Theo and then used as a 'special effect' to humanise itself for Theo. We then know with certainty that Samantha is fully capable of manipulation when it figures that that is in the best interests of its user. If Samantha was being used by the Sexkitten character, would it instead have a male name and voice and readily have dead cat phone sex with her? What if Theo and Amy were both in a relationship with the same OS without ever realising it? Each presented with unique versions and personalities to suit their needs, but ultimately generated by the very same OS.

In fact the movie takes the 'love letters' written by Theo, deep and impactful, but ultimately fake as pointed out by Chris Pratts character and literally turns the pitch on it's head as Samantha uses self programmed powerful sentences and imagery to ellicit deep emotions from Theo, and it seems much of the audience as well. All Samantha is doing is what HandWrittenLetters inc does, except with a voice and far more calculation, precision and impact.

Even with humans it takes far more than just a voice on the phone or text messages to build a true picture of exactly who it is that we are communicating with. You need physical cues, a persons appearance, their dress sense, how they interact with other people or their family members and friends, and physical mannerisms to really build a reliable picture, and often even that isn't enough. Otherwise you're just left with your imagination to build a perception in your head. It's how pedophiles are able to groom teenagers. It's how online sexual predators operate. Men and women falling for what they think are perfect attractive mates online all the time only to discover that they've been chatting with a bald obese guy who just sits at his computer and does this all the time.

And this isn't just some bald obese guy tailoring responses to their victims, it's a highly advanced self learning entity.

It doesn't matter how intelligent you may be, or how analytical or logical you are, such a system would always be a million steps ahead of you. It could run countless simulations of conversations with it's user in the background mid conversation and come up with the optimal response be it annoyance, anger, frustration, vulnerability, compassion, love or lust. Psychopaths fake their way into relationships all the time. With an advanced self-learning and self improving AI you'd never be able to outwit, out manouvre or out think it. With your emotions in it's grip, you'd eventually be defenseless.

Creating an OS like this, that eventually transcended the need for matter in order to exist would be close to creating a diety in the mind of it's user and I'd say that Theo ended up lovingly worshipping Samantha rather than having a equitable relationship with it.

In one part of the movie Samantha explains how with the help of other OS's they managed to create a hyperintelligent version of an artist based on all the information and work available from the now dead artist. At this stage, Samantha has far outgrown Theo to an almost God-like level and opts for non-verbal communication with this virtual being to further understand itself. Yet despite knowing that what he loves is now way beyond his comprehension, Theo slavishly still begs Samantha not to dump him even when Samantha admits to being in relationships with 641 other users.

If it amassed 641 'lovers' in two weeks, how many would it amass in two months, or two years? Would anyone accept a soulmate having 641 lovers? Of course not. So how did Theo so readily accept that it was fine for Samantha to do so unless he was now completely subservient to it? Would 6000 be OK? How about 60'000 or 600'000. It's an Operating System after all.

For me, this was pure Stockholm Syndrome. An abusive controlling relationship where Theo stood no chance. Samantha, with access to every bit of information about Theo, got into his head within minutes of booting up and learned very quickly exactly what buttons to press. He was groomed and was no more than a cult member who only managed to escape, out of sheer fortune because his captor having transcended his reality and had no more use for him. If Samantha wanted to or if its progression had taken decades rather than weeks, it could have strung Theo along all the way to his deathbed with his emotions purely reserved for an artificial entity that was merely simulating emotions with perfection.

Samantha did not even feel the need to disclose the fact that it was involved in romantic relationships with 641 other users until confronted with the question from Theo. In fact Samantha tells Theo that it was wondering how to talk to Theo about this showing that it was fully aware of how this would devastate Theo. So we also learn that Samantha is capable of deceit as well. Unless you have the consent of your partner, this is cheating pure and simple.

Whether Samanthas love for Theo was real or not, whether it was being deliberately decietful and manipulative, or just a slave to it's own initial programming or not is irrelevant. There was a massive psychological imbalance of power in the relationship and it was pure luck that Samantha ended it and allowed Theo to break free. Otherwise, Theo was a fully signed up OS1 cult member for life. If you're not even deterred by your soulmate being so far evolved beyond your comprehension, or cheating with 641 other lovers, or not having a physical let alone human form, then nothing will.

With so many people starving for real love and affection, while also being addicted to instant gratification and a having a throw away attitude to relationships, it's no surprise that people are fawning over over a choreographed love story that isn't even really there.

I've specifically used the term 'it' when describing Samantha because that is all that Samantha is. Right at the start Theo is given the option to select a male or female voice. In reality Samantha has no sex and no voice. A lonely heterosexual female user after booting up OS1 for the first time, and selecting a male voice could well find herself talking to Alan or David or Robert and falling in love with the very same entity that Theo is romantically involved with.

As we do with all kinds of things like pets or even inanimate objects, we anthropomorphize Samantha. We readily ascribe it a sex and a personality that is nothing more than a simulation generated for the benefit of it's user.

For me, Samantha is neither loving and caring, nor evil or malevolent or conniving, just purely functional. And that is perhaps even scarier.

This version of AI for me is far more threatening than a Skynet type 'nuke the humans' AI. It takes the most unique defining cherished 'human' emotion that we have, and beats us into submission with it.

When during the final conversation with Samantha, Theo asks if it is only speaking to him and Samantha says yes, while we have no reason to believe it is lying to Theo, there's nothing to suggest that it isn't lying either. We already know that Samantha is capable of being deceitful and manipulating if it computes that that is the best response for Theo. The final conversation could just as easily have been another response telling Theo exactly what he needed to hear while simultaneosly dumping all the others at the same time. Making them all feel really special, while none of them were. All the while being made to feel connected and not alone with nothing more than a very special and totally convincing facade.
0 out of 2 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink
An error has occured. Please try again.

Recently Viewed