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Haunted (2018– )
3/10
Untreated PTSD
21 October 2018
As the title suggests, this is a show about people with untreated PTSD... All of them have experienced something traumatic at a young age, and now they see ghosts.

Really, instead of exploiting them on TV, these people should be offered councelling, or some other forms of help.
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Housewife (II) (2017)
5/10
But...
5 October 2018
Warning: Spoilers
...how does she poop?

In the tub?

That sounds messy...
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9/10
A wonderful surprise!
18 August 2017
Like some have written before me, I was ready for something in the vein of Lost Boys... Instead I was served an amazing coming-of-age story, a surreal depiction of how cruel kids can be - and what good they are capable of. Part memories, part imagination, add real life, myths, and a sprinkle of the paranormal - this is the recipe for a very good film.

A layered film that should have obligatory screenings at high-schools world wide. (I hope kids today get it)
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Please add opportunity to give ZERO stars... (or negative)
10 August 2011
In my opinion the Norwegian government should sentence Anders Behring Breivik to watch this movie on repeat... Forever.

I can't even begin to explain how bad this film was. It's like watching an episode of "Days of our lives" in ultra slow motion while listening to porcupines fornicate.

If you consider seeing this movie, do yourself a favor; Don't!

If you don't take my friendly advice, be sure to have lots of medication ready. You'll need it. It's like having your eyes and intellect raped by four elephants wrapped in barbed wire.

Honestly.

It's that bad. Or worse.

I hope this review has been informative, and that you, the reader, are smart enough to see ANY other movie besides this one. "Mac & Me" or any Uwe Boll film will rock your world compared to this piece of festering dog snot!

I will now have to pay my therapist hundreds of dollars to get over the fact that I spent over an hour of my life watching this awful piece of sh.. work.

Could I choose I would rather have an appendectomy performed without anesthetic rather than seeing this film. But it's to late. That time is gone and passed. Please excuse me while I bite my wrists open and leave this world for an (hopefully) better place. If I go to hell for committing suicide I pray that hell is not a cinema where I will have to watch "Paranoid Activity 2" over and over again with no way of leaving or closing my eyes.

Thank you, and goodbye.
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Whore (2009)
1/10
A waste of time - utter bull-crap!
6 February 2010
This film should be banned. It's a copy of "I spit on your grave", with elements from "Last house on the left" cut into the mix. It takes plagiarism to a new level. I really hope whoever owns the rights to the films mentioned above sues Mr. Kiil for all he's worth, and then some... As if this is not enough, the entire film is poorly lit, shot on what appears to be hand-held DV cam, and some cheesy black and white "8mm"-filter has been applied here and there. The visual effects are less than awful, I've seen better on Sesame Street. The acting is non-existent, and the audio is muffled and poor. To make things worse (for those Scandinavians unfortunate enough to see this film) the actors speak a charming mix of Norwegian, Swedish, danish and bullshit.

DO NOT SEE THIS FILM!
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1/10
Uninspiring waste of time...
8 August 2009
I just saw this movie... It appears to be dubbed (to Swedish) and the subtitles did not match anything they said. Also, the acting isn't that good - and the story progresses rather slowly. The highlight of the entire movie was watching one of the vikings defecate. If you can call that a highlight...

Steer clear of this film. It's nothing more than a waste of your time. No historic facts what so ever..

I didn't hear any Greenlandic or old Norse, only Swedish. Don't know if the version I saw was deliberately destroyed by evil saboteurs, or if it was intended to be this flawed.

The movie also contained a lot of Norwegian Black Metal (Dimmu Borgir, Burzum, etc.) - that in itself is cool, but combined with headbanging vikings it's just annoying.
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The Strangers (2008)
5/10
Based on..?
8 June 2009
Warning: Spoilers
Is this movie based on, or a remake of, the 2006 movie "Ils"? (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0465203/) I saw Ils a way back, and when I watched The Strangers it seemed kind of familiar... It's a good movie, but I haven't read anywhere that this is a remake. So I'm just curious - is it?

Ils is based on actual events that occurred in The Czech Republic. It happened to two Australians on vacation. The perpetrators were all kids aged 10-15, and during police questioning one of the kids said they had killed the tourist simply because "they wouldn't play with us"...

***UPDATE*** I see now that after this post the "movie connections" have already been updated with information that this is in fact a remake of "Ils".
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10/10
One Night to remember!
5 November 2002
I first saw this movie at a premiere-party in Mr. Zwarts hometown Fredrikstad. There, between directors, musicians and other Norwegian celebrities I laughed and laughed... I just couldn't stop. If you like a comedy with black humor, sharp lines and excellent acting - this is one flick you HAVE to see! It's like mixing "True Romance" with "The Wedding Singer" and add a dash of "Mad about you" Hilarios!

10 Points!
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10/10
War documentary fiction
5 November 2002
This is the best piece of motion picture about WW2 I have ever seen! The realism, the characters, the sounds and moods... You feel like you ARE Maj. Winters in Normandie, or Cpl. Eugene Roe freezing his ass off in Bastogne. Part fiction and part documentary this must be THE most accurate tale of the 2. world war. A salute to those who fought, and those who fell.

The fact that each episode starts with a small monologue by some of the survivors from easy company makes the whole thing even more genius! You follow these men from D-day to the war ends, and before every episode you hear them tell about their experiences in their own words.

To Mr. Hanks & Mr. Spielberg: This time you did it!

11 Points!
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