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thegregstir
Reviews
The Passion of the Christ (2004)
That is some fu*ked up repugnant sh*t
Take the Mr. Blonde and cop scene from Reservoir Dogs, replace the cop with Jesus and Mr. Blonde with a bunch of Jews and you have The Passion of Christ.
There was no real complete story and I had no idea who the characters were. It might of helped if I weren't a Jew "Christ killer". Luckily I had seen Jesus Christ Superstar, otherwise I would have been totally lost. Other than the whole being a Jew thing, the film was done well, good acting (I think, I don't speak Aramaic), the effects were awesome (great blood and gore) and the visuals were freaky as all hell.
At times this film was the scariest movie I had ever seen. For Mel's next project I suggest the Excorcist III, it would be awesome.
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
(Tear) I am so upset
Why God? Why, oh why is the journey over!?
I have got to pull myself together.
Its just a movie. Its just a really good movie. Its just an incredibly superior film. Its just one of the greatest motion pictures of the last hundred years. Its just one of the most wonderful story ever conjured up by the human race.
Yeah, its not that big a deal.
Satan's Cheerleaders (1977)
So bad it was past good-bad and is just bad
One day at my good friend,s house, we came across Satan's Cheerleaders in the closet. We soon discovered it starred my friend's mother (not the girl who gets naked). So of course we had to watch. It started out cheesy and a funny B horror movie. By the end our smiles had faded and we were left quite disappointed at how terrible a feature film could be. It is probably the worst movie ever created. As for my friend's mom, she never knew we saw it and is something we are avoiding ever talking about.
The Matrix Revolutions (2003)
The robots could of made a better movie!
If you didn't love the second Matrix, but still want a few questions cleared up, do not see Revolutions. Why? It will be a waste of your time, few questions are answered and even more brought up. They must be planing another movie or something because the cliff hanger in the end of this one is much more mysterious than in Reloaded. But besides a few dozen lose ends you can still count on a few cool fights... Well one cool fight... Well one fight, that surprisingly was alot like Superman II.
Even with the overwhelming amount of shortcomings in Revolutions, the greatest was that of the human element. The acting was a joke and the cheesy, predictable diologue didn't help. And its not just Reeves' disabilities as an actor, but the entire cast had trouble acting like humans.
There were though three decent qualities about the movie: rain effects (slightly overdone, but still pretty cool)and Monica B's two children(not nearly enough of)
Well, I must apologies to the Wichowski Bros for my comments, I guess they just raised the bar too high for themselves with the "real" Matrix as well as Bound. I hope, no, I believe their next project will reflect some of the characteristics from those two films.