Reviews

However, this dumbest ending, where a serial killer eventually is caught, but then let loose again, and no one is actually sure if he was the right guy - neither we the audience nor the characters in the film - this immense pseudo-intellectual ending made all the pseudo-intellectual critics win this film many awards. It doesn't deserve even one single award. Unless, of course, there is a price for total pseudo-intellectual rubbish?

Oh, wait, maybe such prices actually exist?

Hmm...

The two self-proclaimed morons, Casper and Frank, are squatting a friend's house who went on a month's vacation in Malaga. They were supposed to go to Iceland for a big Hooker-party. Casper is leaving his pregnant wife at home in Denmark, and Frank is leaving his old wife that he doesn't wanna have sex with anymore.

So it's all about the famous Sex!

However, as always, they manage to get into trouble and are kicked out of the airport by the police. So no Hooker-party in Iceland for those two old sex-hungry men.

For some obscure reason, that didn't have any logic to me, they are afraid to leave the house, but luckily for both of them, the freezer is packed with spring rolls, there are a wine cellar and an unexplainable amount of Carlsberg beer - probably the worst beer in the world.

There are no toothbrushes in the house. How that is possible is beyond me. In such a rich country like Denmark, every household has several toothbrushes laying around. And Casper forgot to bring one, so every day he wants to borrow Frank's toothbrush. However, Franks says "no" and then the story is mostly about how they are fighting about Frank's toothbrush. Very unlogical and very unfunny.

Casper could have sneaked out at night and bought himself a toothbrush. They don't dare to leave the house because it is located just across the street from Frank's house. However, they dared to enter the house in bright daylight and have no problems leaving the house to get medicine when they become ill, but not even when Casper is at the pharmacy to pick up the prescribed medication he doesn't think of buying a toothbrush

To me, this is an unfunny stupid film. But what do I know?!

Now, if you check out my other reviews and ratings of Christopher Nola's movies, you will understand that I absolutely love his films and great cinematic talent.

But I have to be honest with myself and I am not afraid of the future for Mr. Nolan and his future films. Even Steven Spielberg and Francis Ford Coppola have made a few not so good movies.

The Tenet is a very, very bad movie. In all aspects. The story is really bad. In fact so bad that I don't understand it. I don't get it what so ever. And Nolan's visual style in this movie feels like he didn't even try. It seems like he was bored with himself and this film, but that said, being a filmmaker myself, he might just have been blinded by issues with the whole production and these things happens, even to the best Film directors.

Why do we need a scene with Michael Caine that lasts no more than a minute and a half? Why? Doesn't make sense, not even for the story, the script. It's like Nolan thought to himself that Michale is old and he might die any day now and he wanted his last movie to be his movie.

But what really brings this movie down to the most horrible film I have seen in many, many years, besides the story that I don't understand (sorry, I don't understand the Tenet's story) ---- SHALL I REPEAT MYSELF???? What really brings it down are the horrible actions scenes THAT ARE BACKWARDS, because something from the future travels back in time and moves BACKWARDS because it is from the future?????

THIS MOVIE IS BAD - BAD - BAD - BAD

Sorry, Nolan, I don't get it and I was almost falling asleep during some of the action scenes. I had to fight hard to keep myself awake and this has never happened to me since watching the stupid long ending scene of The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003) which I rated with one (1) Star.

In fact, I believe the only reason why I rated THE TENET two (2) stars is because I have a deep respect for Mr. Nolan and his work - but NOT this time because I don't get it. Any of it!

Do you remember the ending of the original MAD MAX from 1979? No? Well, let me not spoil it for you. However, THE LAST DAYS OF AMERICAN CRIME begins somehow as MAD MAX ends... That's all I am gonna tell you about MAD MAX, an excellent movie by the way.

But here is the thing. A thing that every single cigar smoker in the entire world knows. When you stop puffing on your cigar the glow of the cigar will die within 5 to 10 minutes depending on the quality of the cigar, but it will eventually die out.

Our hero in THE LAST DAYS OF AMERICAN CRIME has tied up a bad guy in a bathtub full of diesel fuel and poured diesel fuel all over him as well. He then lits a cigar and places it in the bad guy's mouth before leaving him alone with his destiny. The idea is that eventually the glow will reach and burn his lips and the cigar will drop into the fuel and he will be burned to death... And yes, that happens. In fact, the diesel fuel in the bathtub explodes... BOOM BA DA BOOM... That's the opening scene for you.

In reality, a glow of a cigar or a cigarette would never be able to light up diesel fuel, but that's an entirely different story. After our hero leaves the bad guy alone, with the cigar in his mouth and his hands tied to his back, all he needs to do is wait for a few minutes until the glow of the cigar dies out by itself...

I guess what I am trying to say is that this film is kind of stupid. So now you know...

Enough is enough. And as a viewer, I can not care for the reasons why?! Godfather and Godfather II were perfect movies with true sadness and melancholia. Godfather II was an even better movie than the first Godfather.

Then came Godfather III and destroyed, completely destroyed the legacy of Godfather and Godfather II. The ending in Godfather II with Michael sitting alone on a bench at the lake was a stroke of genius, but then came Godfather III where Copolla allowed and old unmotivated Al Pacino to give the character Michael a completely different personality that destroyed the character of Michael in part I and II.

IF YOU HAVE NEVER WATCH THE GODFATHER TRIOLIGY MAKE SURE YOU NEVER WATCH PART III - Then all will be fine and you will forever love Mr. Francis Ford Coppola.

The first Apocalypse Now was PERFECT - SIMPLY PERFECT. THE BEST FILM EVER MADE in my honest opinion.

I for one particularly like the version where Kurtz compound gets bombed and burned during the end credits making you wonder if Willard did or didn't call in the airstrike... JUST PERFECT. FULL STOP.

Then came REDUX and destroyed the legacy of Apocalypse Now. FULL STOP. And let me tell you, the difference between REDUX and the FINAL CUT version of Apocalypse Now is simply ridiculous and therefore to me, it is no better than the REDUX version. I was watching FINAL CUT in IMAX, of course, and in the back of my mind, I was hoping that Copolla had gone back to the original version... hmm... he hadn't... hmm...

If you ever watched THE MAKING OF Apocalypse Now it would be much easier for you to understand what I am about to explain. Nevertheless, let me try.

EVERYTHING from the French plantation scenes never made it to the original version of Apocalypse Now. In THE MAKING OF Apocalypse Now we see a very angry and frustrated Francis Ford Coppola explaining the cast and crew of his film that they should all forget about this part of the movie. Erase it from their minds (not sure this were his exact words...) since he already then knew he was never going to use it. That he hated it and that it was completely misplaced in his vision of Apocalypse Now.

For years I always wondered what he meant and what those scenes at the French plantation were all about?! Then I watch the REDUX version and finally understood what he was talking about in THE MAKING OF Apocalypse Now. The scenes at the French plantation were made to explain a political and pseudointellectual view of why wars are the unnecessary stupidity of the human race. If the audience weren't clever enough to understand the antiwar message from the original version, well then, the scenes at the French plantation would spell it out for you.

Also, the funeral of Clean with a torn and burned US-flag seems utterly ridiculous and misplaced together with the dreamlike short fling between Willard and the French widow. If you have watched the original version over and over again, as I did for many, many years, you will understand why Francis Ford Coppola was frustrated and angry, asking the cast and crew to forget that they ever shot those scenes. It's like if you are listening to Beethovens Fifth symphony and suddenly a romantic piece of music composed by Mozart is being played in between the movements composed by Beethoven... It just erupts the whole experience of the Fifth symphony.

Also, important, are the added scenes of Kilgore trying to hunt down Willard and his men because of his stolen surfboard. Ridiculous scenes that fortunately didn't make it into the original version of Apocalypse Now.

Also, in the original, Willard never tries to befriend or become social with the crew on the boat. He is a loner doing his business in as much secrecy as possible, making the movie more dark and realistic. In REDUX and the FINAL CUT he has his laughs and tries bounding with the rest of the crew, making scenes like shooting the Vietnamese woman who runs for her puppet more unbelievable, since logically, he couldn't react like this towards his new comrades on the boat, as an example.

And I could continue. The scenes where they find the Bunny girls raped and drugged are also completely misplaced in REDUX, but thankfully cut out again in the FINAL CUT...

Had Francis Ford Coppola only had the courage to let the FINAL CUT go back to the original version. The young people of today who weren't even born back in 1979 could have experienced a real masterpiece rather than this interrupted symphony. What a complete shame Mr. Coppola - You missed a chance of a lifetime...

So, my final thoughts. REDUX and FINAL CUT are both BIG NO-NOs, but the ORIGINAL from 1979, in my modest, but honest opinion, STILL IS THE BEST MOVIE IN THE HISTORY OF PLANET EARTH.

FULL STOP.

(So, if you have never watched Apocalypse Now, then stay away from the darkness in the movie theaters and find an old copy of the original Apocalypse Now from 1979. Preferable the version where Kurtz's compound is being bombed during the end credits... and don't ever watch the REDUX or FINAL CUT versions.)

No idea why this film is rated so low... It's a great little story that is very well thought through. And I like the concept of the films visual style. It has been done many times before where we either follow one character's POV throughout the film or a camcorders POV... Here we stay with the cars and even so we are never in any doubt of what is going on everywhere else than inside the car or outside of the car. It is all very well thought through and it works very well. So does all the actors and I can only highly recommend this film. Good job well done. Really like it.

Is Sofia Coppola's The Beguiled a horrible movie? Yes and no. It should have been more horrible in some ways. The film is missing all the oomph that the original with Clint Eastwood directed by Don Siegel had in 1971 – that was a damn good movie, hands down.

I first became acquainted with Sofia Coppola in Godfather part III, the movie that destroyed the legacy of Godfather and Godfather part II (but let's not get in to that particular problem in this review, but let me just say this: if you loved how part II ended in strong melancholy, you should never, ever watch part III – Nor should you watch the *REDUX* re-edited version of Francis Ford Coppola's masterpiece Apocalypse Now).

Sofia was fairly good as an actress, but in the end scene at the opera where she got shot, she lost it. That was horrible acting and she did not convince me that her character actually died… That by its own destroyed the ending of Godfather part III

So when she years later decided to become a film director I thought to myself that maybe that was a vice decision of her. And I think it was. She has made some decent good films, but not this one. The new version of The Beguiled becomes more of a stylistic experiment in southern foggy weather, periodic dresses and beautiful misty mornings.

The film is also an experiment in how to make a good story boring. Enough said. Almost.

With the understanding that I might be called a male chauvinist pig, it is my honest opinion that this types of movies and The Beguiled in particular, should be, and was, made by a man. Sofia who has made at least one good movie, Lost in Translation, should pick her future scripts more carefully or she will end up tarnishing her father's name.

Bad, bad movie. Bad movie.

I got disappointed from the get go. The Classic tones from John Williams's Star Wars Theme didn't open the film. Nor did the Star Wars Theme play at any time during the film or at the end credits. The music to Rouge One is composed by Michael Giacchino. The music isn't bad and Michael Giacchino is an excellent composer. Only Disney should had hired John Williams or at least paid him to get the permission to use his Star Wars Theme. This is one investment opportunity that the Disney executive will regret one day I am sure. All Star Wars fans wants' to hear the Star Wars Theme blast out of the speakers in the big screen cinema. The Star Wars Theme 'is' Star Wars. Without it the film can never be anymore than a 2nd grade copycat. I am sorry, but that is the Holy Truth of the Star Wars universe.

They have changed the concept somehow. They want to stay in the mythology of Star Wars, adventures in outer space in the distant future with all sorts of high tech we still haven't invented. On the other hand they want the story and the film to be more buttoned down, more in contact with the realities of the world that we are actually living in. They are trying to make Star Wars more social realistic. And that is a shame. I want the adventure in the distant future. I don't need Disney to point their moral fingers at me telling me how to live my life and be a good human being.

There is clearly something wrong with Rouge One. Very disappointing.

So the good stuff.

Well, the character Saw Gerrera played by Forest Whitaker is amazing. Truly amazing. 99% because of Forest Whitaker's acting and interpretation of the character. So when he dies with only 10 minutes screen time you feel disappointed, cheated and lost. You can feel that you want to have this character in all future Star Wars films, but now he is gone... (or is he??? - in the world of cinema you can revive anybody from the dead).

Felicity Jones (Jyn Erso) and Mads Mikkelsen (Galen Erso) are great with their characters too, but Forest Whitaker takes the prices though he, we and everybody else are being let down without John Williams's Star Wars Theme.

Disney, Disney, Disney… No, No, No

There are two outstanding scenes in Godfather II (which I think is better than the first Godfather) and they are both very melancholic. Francis Ford Coppola used to be "THE" master of creating melancholic scenes in many of his films! I wish he would go back to do that a few times more before he parts with us one day in the distant future. In Godfather Part II there is a FLASHBACK scene to Godfather part I. I don't know if this scene is a original "cut out" from Godfather part I, but even James Caan is in this one shot scene where the family is about to have dinner and James Caan starts having a fight with his little brother played by Al Pacino. The scene ends with Al Pacino sitting alone after announcing that he has joined the army during 2nd world war as the rest of the family has rushed off to greet the Godfather who OFF-SCREEN is coming home. Very melancholic scene. The second melancholic scene in Godfather II is the end shot of the film where Al Pacino, the new Godfather, is sitting alone in solitude on a bench in his garden. GREAT, GREAT, GREAT !!! I always loved that scene and it was the end scene of two fantastic masterpieces. HOWEVER, I maid the mistake of watching Godfather part III and that has totally destroyed the memory of that end shot in Godfather part II. So Mr. Coppola that was a dumb move making Godfather III - just my own personal honest opinion. Add to that Sofia Coppola who is not a great actor (a much better director if you ask me) especially in the end scene where she gets shot. It doesn't look real. She acts very badly in that scene. Another mistake by Coppola letting his own daughter act in his film. Would had been OKAY if she was a good actress!!! Over and out for the Godfather films!!!

This is by far the worst film I have seen in years! A ridiculous story that never surprises and just gets more and more boring. And why does the camera work need to shake all the time and I mean all the time???!!! I think there were three shots on a tripod, everything else was shaky, shaky. Even the scenes with quiet moments: Shaky, Shaky. Totally ridiculous and annoying. When do the directors who are in love with Shaky camera work realize that it is out of fashion and that films with shaky, shaky pictures never ever will make it into the film history books. Get over it and make films where we can actually see what is going on!!! Jesus! Thank God it wasn't in 3D too, then we would only have the sound to rely on. And by the way, the sound work is boring too. The so-called aliens sound like, well, you guessed it, the Predator. Boring again! The executive producers who approved the budget of no less than 70.000.000 $ should not be in the movie business, they should be selling used cars or arms in third world countries, OMG!!! Waste of good money. Aaron Eckhart was the only positive thing in this film. Nice actor, but he must have been desperate for work and hard cash since joining this bad scripted project. He could not bring the film to another level all by himself. I always love Michelle Rodriguez, but my God she acts so bad in this film and what is the director doing with the actors? NOTHING!!! That is the answer to that!!!! NOTHING!!!! In the scene where we first encounter Michelle Rodriguez, she is (supposed to be) out of breath running from the powerful aliens. She is just sitting there "trying" to hyperventilate (I am not kidding, watch the scene and judge for yourself), it is so clear that she just had a laugh and a latte, super bad acting, and over-super bad directing. I would have sent her on a run ten times around the studio block to make sure that she REALLY was out of breath and not just "pretending" with bad acting! What were the producers and the executives thinking when they were watching the daily prints??? Did they follow the production at all???!!!! This is a first-class scenario on how not to make a big Studio film!!! And finally, I must ask the director and the production designer one question: Do you really think that Aliens from the other side of the Universe are gonna come flying in Spaceships that look like they were entirely made out of used car antennas???

Ehhh… help me out here… was this a remake of Michael Mann's "Heat" from 1995?

The plot, the characters, everything. You've got the secret love that the law will destroy! The super cool bank robbers that we love to love. Within the bank robbers team there is the crazy ass f##### messing it up for his teammates! You've got the music that clearly the film-director told Harry Gregson-Williams to make a rip-off from the soundtrack of "Heat" (or maybe the director had no part of this???).

Not that Harry Gregson-Williamsto doesn't make good music. Only that he is famed for making rip-offs like Beverly hills cop II where all the music was stolen from John Carpenter and Alan Howards great soundtrack of ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK …… and I could easily continue… You feel "Heat" all over "Town"!!!