Reviews

Note to Self - Do not watch movies that cannot spell their own titles.

What's that? That was intentional?

Note to Self - Do not watch movies that intentionally spell their titles incorrectly to attract the vast plethora of chat-lingo-afflicted-pseudo-cool-GenXYZ target audience.

I was hoping this would at least be funny, cause from the looks of the trailers and the obvious dig at the title it was going to surprise us all into being a love story. This was neither funny and lets not go into the love story. I have no clue why the two leads fall in love.

J (as he prefers to be called) is habitually late, fudges up nearly all the tasks asked of him, talks loudly to strangers in movie halls, doesn't answer calls from his mother, interferes in other peoples lives by offering them his do-anna, sleeps around, wears "funky" tee-shirts, has a cool hair-do... oh wait, the last two bits would instantly negate all the other bits.

Simran-ji is a girls girl, she likes pink, and flowers and eats ice-cream directly from the tub, knows she has a pretty smile so she smiles all the friggin time, strings along her childhood sweetheart and then dumps him cause he kept sending her white flowers while all the time she wanted red roses... oh wait, have I done this before?

So we have two cardboard cut-outs from previous movies that the film-makers slapped on new faces to. NONE of J's lines were funny. In fact they were so un-funny they were painful to watch. As was Imran's attempt at being a misunderstood-but-lovable-jerk. Your uncle is lovable. You have miles to go son. Sonam had the easier bits. She was required to show up for shoots and she did. Rest everything her smile took care of. Flash here, flash there, tone it down here, PACK UP!

As a spoof on all the love stories that Bollywood consistently churns out day in and day out, this was an epic fail. Nearly all the characters were clichés, from that fat-best-friend who wasn't that smart or that funny and couldn't get skinnier chicks so he of course ends up with an equally fat chick to the hip mother who doles out really bad romantic advice over the phone, the artsy-fartsy director who was asked to act like a girl on her 5th period of that month... you get the drift?

I gave it 2 stars- for the bespectacled guy who seemed the only sane and likable person in this bore-fest.

I rented this for Emily Blunt :) and even though her screen time is tiny, it was satisfyingly funny as heck!

I'm not a father or a widower, but I have lost one of my parents and I have taken care of my niece and nephew, so I feel I can be a lil judgmental in my review. I will get the most bothersome part out first.

Dealing with the death of a spouse must be difficult, I cannot imagine how Dan managed to move on and from what it appears- has managed to provide a healthy, meaningful life to his three daughters and still have the energy to smile and make individual sandwiches. Dealing with the death of their mother must have been equally hard for the daughters, especially the elder ones, which I guess is the reason why I was prepared to be forgiving in the beginning of the movie when the middle child is shown to be exceptionally vile to her father.

OK. You are 15 yrs old and you believe you are in "love" and proceed to act like a crazed lunatic, lying, blubbering and screeching painfully at every opportunity your father tries to talk some sense into you. Your dad is at least above 40, has been through a marriage, childbirths, career- by all rights he would be having some frame of reference to base his decisions on? Cara, I'm really sorry to say, is an ungrateful, spoilt, ill-tempered (even for a 15 yr old!!), rude and a down-right vile child. I know I said vile before. There is no other way to describe her treatment of her father. I felt no sympathy for her and it was incredibly wrong of the movie-makers to have the final scene, where her poor father apologizes to her (the others, I can understand). He shouldn't ever have to apologize for looking out for his daughter when admittedly at 15 we are known to make really stupid decisions!

Apart from Cara, I loved Dan- such a delightful man. Funny and sweet and so endearingly unsure, wanting to be loved and show love and just have that acceptance again in his life. Wanting to do the right thing but bungling it up colossally cause he's a man- flawed and in love. I felt he could have perhaps eased up with his eldest on her driving the car. If he could perhaps have shown more confidence in her. The youngest was just plain adorable and so wise! Loved her character.

I loved the dynamic between Dan and Marie, I think it was extremely well showcased- wanting to be together yet forcing yourself not to be yet going ahead and throwing yourselves at each other in tiny lil moments, knowing its wrong, wanting it to be right, hoping no one notices... ahhh! sweet love! I have read views here that think Binoche wasn't the right choice, but I think it worked beautifully. Her accent, her slightly bohemian personality worked wonderfully against Carells.

The Burns Family, although a tad annoying (noisy laundry at night, barging in on private conversations) are close-knit (perhaps too much?) We get it... the film-makers wanted to portray an over-the-top but still lovable smattering of people that we all have in our own families.

My favorite scene is the one where they double date and Dan attempts to "dance", cracks me up every time! My second favorite scene is the bookstore scene, it was played out so naturally.

I enjoyed this one a lot!

Lets see here- you have 2 strangers on a bridge wanting to commit suicide, for reasons when revealed later will make you wonder how the real people with really real and frightening problems are dealing with themselves! The strangers keep bumping into each other, cry and moan a bit about being serious about killing themselves, attempt ludicrous ways to off each other and surprise!... fail miserably, figure out the universe wont let them off so easy for being such bungling buffoons, make a weird pact to live for 20 odd days and fulfill their really lame and boring last wishes and meet again, hopefully to jump off the bridge again on 31st Dec.

Kiara- Jilted (in her head at least) and heartbroken, is somehow always annoyingly cheerful, remembers to put on her perfect makeup, do her hair, color coordinate her preppy clothes, boozes and dances and sings to her vain lil hearts desire. And we are supposed to believe this chick is suicidal. Yeah. Right.

Akshay- Bankrupt and selfish, is somehow shown to be quite insightful, a virgin (so we like him for being virtuous *groan*), always tucks his jeans inside his boots for reasons known only to him, falls for this pseudo-nutty broad cause, well cause he obviously has nothing better to do for these 20 days of wish fulfillment.

Throw in some vague set of desi people who always bump into them at parties, are coastguards, doctors with some really good advice, friends and families who hover on the periphery of the vapid lives of our leads. Ho hum.

Now the question you should be asking is where did these 2 get the money to blow at parties, booze, road trips and gas, gamble in casinos, hospital stays, hotel stays and food and endless cups of coffee etc. when the Hero is bankrupt and the Heroine gets laid off from her waitressing job. Last I heard living in NYC isn't cheap and Kiara through some miracle or Daddy's benevolence has a swanky place overlooking the city lights.

I guess I was supposed to connect and feel empathy for these two star-crossed losers and smirk along with their quirks, instead I'm enraged that movie makers think the average audience is so thirsty for the glam quotient in our lil ordinary lives that watching 2 completely unlikeable characters on screen waste money and their lives, trying to figure out good enough reasons to live for by singing in clubs and driving down to Vegas, will fulfill some of our wishes. Puhlease.

And finally, are we supposed to really believe that all the time these two evolutionary rejects spent in water, in NYC winters and they didn't ONCE catch hypothermia?! Gimme a break!

**This review contains MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD**

The film came highly recommended from friends and family, a true portrayal of "the common man's struggle" against bureaucracy. I rented this on high hopes of wanting to appreciate and like Akshay Kumar's effort as a comedian, but alas! I should have known better.

Sachin Tichkule- a sad parody of an uncommon man.

In college he punches his sweetheart cause she didn't want to live up to HIS ideals of protesting and striking by refusing to give her exams cause she came from a poor family unlike him and did not wish to spoil her future. In other words by politically rallying and not by trying to secure their future via education can today's youth hope to enlighten this country. - Later in the movie she tries to commit suicide when he frames her for accepting a bribe from him, and miraculously FORGIVES this man when he lays a terrible sob story on her.

In his employment he has a construction worker who repeatedly is caught spying on women, teasing them and lying every chance he gets, yet even after a police complaint the workers isn't kicked off the job. He's shown as a confidant and "friend" of Tichkule, complete with song and dance routines!

Tichkule borrows money constantly, consistently and is never once shown repaying his loans or even feeling repentant that he owes so many people (from his workers and servants as well!) nor ever offers them any assurance that he will keep his word on repayment. Yet you have violins and empathy-inducing saddy tunes playing when he starts to get on his soap-box to wax eloquent about corruption!

He literally destroys a man's house (granted it was not deliberate- but then are these things ever!?), desecrates another man's property, lives in his parents household yet never once is shown helping them out with running the household, never once apologies for the blight he is and yet is shown to take the moral high-ground in front of all and sundry the chance he gets!

His sister is about to be married off to a corrupt politician and on a long sermon from his father about money preceding ideals (which the poor man had to give after being repeatedly humiliated by his son's actions and listening to his other well-off son/son-in-law's taunts) this jackass Tichkule goes back to the money lender he owes lakhs already and in an epic fail at comedic circus asks for...... wait for it........ MORE MONEY!!! *gasp*

Priyadarshani should retire and instead spend the zillions he wasted in this garbage on other worthwhile efforts- like actually building schools and hospitals.

This was an insult to the rest of us common men and women who do in fact struggle daily trying live by honest means.