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Reviews
Secretary (2002)
Steve Does it Again!!!
What a great movie! I rented this expecting something along the lines of "Office Space" with bondage and boy was I not disappointed! Secretary delivers.
If you call yourself a sensitive human, this film contains so many little truths about mankind's condition, you'll be pleased. We all can relate to Maggie Gylenhall's self- mutilation; I mean, who among us can honestly admit we haven't sharpened a Hummel figurine and gouged at our thighs? And James Spader portrays the quiet angst of management--good help is so hard to find these days. If it isn't people violating the dress code (like, say wearing flipflops to work and annoying you with the slish, slish, slish sound) then it's something else, like a bad secretary making typos.
All I have to say: director Steven Soderbergh does it again. Okay, Maggie G. hasn't got anything on J-Lo in "Out of Sight" yet let's just say that if you can wait through all the slap and tickle, you'll see more of her "true character" than J-Lo ever bared. And for the impatient among you, all I have to say is this: skip to around minute 109.
9+, highly recommended, watch it with someone you love.
The Rainbow (1989)
Merchant and Ivory Do Cinemax
This plays like a Cinemax Saturday Night Special, with Merchant and Ivory production values. I watched it for one reason and one reason only: to see what Amanda Donohoe of "L.A. Law" fame did when she wasn't playing an Australian-Accented lawyer named C.J. on TV. After sitting through this soft core dreck, now I know: making soft core dreck.
Sammi Davis (the "actress"--not to be confused with the one-eyed Rat Pack dude) plays the giggling coming-of-age gal who falls for this soldier guy and finds pleasure under the moon and near a waterfall. If you're into expository walks through flowery gardens and scenes that remind you of a low-budget cross between "Emma" and "Pink Floyd's The Wall", this flick's for you.
But you know, I'm the kind of guy who falls for low-budget crosses between "Emma" and "The Wall". I mean, Amanda Donohoe is no Susan Dey, and Sammi Davis is no J-Lo, and D.H. Lawrence is no Anais Nin, but I'm a sucker for croquet, sex and badminton. If it wasn't for the croquet, sex and badminton--this would get a 1. With it, it gets a 6. No wait, I just checked to see what Sammi Davis' most recent movie was: something called "Soft Toilet Seats". I'm going to have to cut this down to a 5. Even with the badminton.
One Hundred and One Dalmatians (1961)
After 15 Viewings, Still Disturbing
My two-year old is obsessed by this movie. He can't get enough of the unsanitized, unpasteurized fare that Disney used to put out before political correctness drained all the fun out of their movies in an effort to make them suitable for McDonald's action figure tie-ins.
Watching "101 Dalmatians" is like entering a time machine to the days when all the men drank Miller High Life and all the women fetched the men their beers. The animation is so rough it's good; more than a few times you see shots where not everything was colored in. And that's freaking cool. Fast, cheap and out of control.
I mean, what other Disney flick has criminals drinking beers, everyone smoking, gunplay, violence and the lead human character living a quote-unquote "bachelor lifestyle" when everyone knew that "bachelor lifestyle" in 1961 was code for "alternative lifestyle"? Yet Pongo-Boy finds his "pet" a woman, and the ensuing childless marriage is blessed not by the pitter-patter of little infant's feet, but the stench of wet dog smell.
This has to be the funniest Disney movie I've seen: Kanine Krunchies and the little dog watching the Western TV show and trying to peer around the corner's of the screen to see where the bad guy is hiding is worth the price alone.
Even with all its merits, the movie must go back "into the vault" for 28 years. By then, my two-year old will be able to appreciate it in all its perverse glory.