Reviews

What a cheap-looking, stupid film. I thought it was made in the late 70s/early 80s, from the look of it, and I don't mean it as a compliment. I was surprised and disgusted finding out afterwards that this film was made in 2008 for 2 Mio and couldn't come up with anything better. They saved enough money on the actors and effects, so where has all the dough gone?

D. Carradine, what hast thou done?

I can't believe I thought after watching this "jeeez, Birdemic was more entertaining". That says everything.

Detention doesn't come near to be honored with the word "trash", nor is it "so bad it's good". It's not even a homage to the 70s/80s teen slashers.

Sorry I can't be bothered to detail the content. I'm too angry. And my fellow reviewers have already done a good job on this.

Detention bored me to tears but also annoyed me. Stupidity throughout - script, dialog, everything. I expect characters in these kind of flicks to be acting "stupid" (you know, the usual in these type of films - like saying hello who's there in a dark lonely room, opening a door you know better you shouldn't, etc.) but not so retarded. I actually got up inbetween to wash the dishes while watching so my life time wasn't wasted completely.

I'm happy it was a cheap rental. I only made it till the end so I could live to tell. If you want to get rid of a "friend", recommend him/her this film.

Go and watch Dance of the Dead, which also covers the cliché teens (okay, they're slashed by Zombies and not a ghost). That film is silly, but funny and dimensions better in so many ways than Detention.

Oh my.

Well I did read the reviews so I was warned. I thought let's go and challenge good taste, and I wasn't "disappointed". Rolling my eyes so many times they almost fell out of their sockets, I still didn't find the sense to stop the film. I made it to the end, but I don't know if that's an achievement one should be proud of.

The low budget look is okay and the bad acting is just... bad acting, but this can be part of the "charm" in these type of films. Sometimes bad acting replaces or enhances humor because of the goofy look.

My conclusion is - what comes up when a group of people get seriously drunk and then one says let's make a film and all go haywire with ideas. The outcome is hilarious while you're boozed, but next morning you just moan and wince at the thought of it. Here, no one had the guts next morning to be the one pointing out that they'll better leave it.

Some "jokes" seem to be taken straight from the walls of a lavatory in the wrong part of town, just thrown in for the sake of it and where they couldn't think up something witty.

Mostly I winced. I laughed loud once (!) but sadly I can't remember where it was... the shock of this sudden spark in my numb brain blocked my memory completely. And I won't go boldly again to where no man has gone before to find it out.

Some reviews say you have to be Norwegian to "get it". Sorry but I can't accept this lame excuse for this humorous landslide of a film.

If you want to laugh about dialects and the prejudices people to their e.g. Northern or Southern landsmen, watch the french comedy "Bienvenue chez les Ch'tis" (Welcome to the Sticks). The humor was even able to be comprehended and found funny in Germany, in German dubbing (I haven't seen it in English, though).

2 stars for the "good" intentions. By the way, the road to hell is paved with these...

I really wish I could see what the positive viewers see in this film. I tried to give it a chance, as it sounded like a good story which could do without big budget effects, and with fresh new faces.

OK, I admit that with this budget they did the best they can - literally!

Technically well done, enough CGI - why should one see an alien or explosions every few minutes? I'm fine with subtle effects – sound and imagination works well, too. I've seen a mystery film (which was shown, and applauded, at a festival) made by a group of "ordinary" people in their spare time and that was more enjoyable as you could sense their enthusiasm and seriousness about it. And they didn't need buckets of blood, action sequences and massive CGI, it worked perfectly without.

*sigh* back to Monsters. I didn't watch the trailer (they can be misleading) but colleagues told me it's a must-see, and I shouldn't expect an action-packed science fiction. "It's not an action film, but a drama".

Drama? Yep, full of it… one, there's the fact that the film is at least 60 min too long.

Imagine my surprise to see an action sequence at the beginning, the military clash with aliens. Still, I didn't expect this to happen throughout the film – I thought "clever as an opening", and more isn't necessary. Get on with the characters and their dealing with the situation.

SPOILER ALERT Then I unfortunately met the lead characters. A dim-wit woman shrugging off an incident which would have me jumping out of my pants with outrage, and a jerk of a guy I wouldn't want to cross a danger zone with due what happens at the start. At no time was I able to develop any empathy or care if or how they'll make it.

To be fair, I expect people to act irrationally when under stress or fear, but seriously, if you're crossing an area infected with night-active aliens (and you're afraid of them, aren't you?), would you yawn out loud while your boat's motor is defect? Thinking about the passport issue, and how it happened, freaks me out again and again. Don't try to use the lame excuse "he's only human".

Finally, I was wishing the aliens would please get over and done with it and waste them - there was a light of hope after an hour running time, but the aliens "miss" this perfect opportunity, shame.

If the story and characters (and I'm not even giving the actors the fault) aren't taking this seriously, how shall the viewer, for heaven's sake? This is the second film I've not seen till the end (and neither intend to or regret it), and I've been through some cinematic "challenges" in 30 years.

Alternatively, watch a Mexico travel guide DVD and some footage of Paul the Kraken.

Or, to have some enjoyment, get some popcorn, invite some friends with good humor and endurance, and before watching, write down estimations to bet against each other: how many times do you think you will want to b*-slap a character; will you be awake till the end; how often will you successfully fight the urge to fast-forward; how many times will you think "I'm turning this off" (and go wash my hair, sort my socks,…) etc.