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Reviews
The Quick and the Dead (1995)
Under-Rated Western
I won't argue that "Quick and the Dead" should be considered one of the greats of the genre, but then it doesn't try to be; it's a tribute with it's own approach.
It is also, perhaps, the most stylish western ever made! And there are a lot of stylish westerns out there. It was also made with respect and affection towards the genre. It's a fresh take that by all rights should've been more successful than it was and continues to be.
Consider that it has a female protagonist. Already the film crosses new ground; suddenly the archetype character of the lone gunman is effectively turned on it's head. Also it's shot in a way that pays homage to westerns of the past, but gives the film a fresh, kinetic energy. Also, despite the number of gunfights, it never gets dull.
If you're a fan of spaghetti Westerns, keep an eye out for it; you'll never see a better tribute to Leonne-style westerns than right here.
Hwasango (2001)
Watch the Korean Version, because MTV butchered the English dub.
I thank MTV for including the Korean version of this film in it's North American release.
It's a masterpiece of stylized kung-fu action. Breakneck pacing, hyper-realism, and pulse- pounding music abound. I can't exaggerate how entertaining this movie is. The Korean version that is.
I don't have anything bad to say about it. At all. It is a little hard to follow what's going on at the beginning, and I'm sure I could find holes in the story, but it's just so damn entertaining that I didn't care.
Now, the MTV version...
How is it possible to cut out twenty-five minutes of the film and make it seem LONGER than the original?
It plays like a bad TV movie. All original music has been replaced by assorted rap that seems out of place. The story and characters have been dumbed down to the point of unrecognizability. All characters are voiced by rappers, many of whom had never acted before (yes, not only is it badly dubbed, the Asian people are talking gansta). Much of the humor has been left on the cutting room floor.
It tries so hard to be hip and cool that everything that made it hip and cool is lost. Oh, and along the way they broke every rule of good storytelling.
But as I said, at least they included the original on the DVD.
Korean 10/10 MTV 3/10
Sgt. Kabukiman N.Y.P.D. (1990)
a laugh with side helpings of sex and violence
This movie is not a cinematic masterpiece, but when you rent a Trauma movie it's generally common knowledge you're not getting "Godfather". Lloyd Kaufman has never claimed to be Coppila, and Troma has never claimed to produce art.
"Sgt. Kabukiman" is a true 'B' movie. It's poorly written, holds no great truth about the human condition, the fights seem staged, but it succeeds.
How?
It succeeds because it KNOWS it's a 'B' film, and not for one frame of celluloid does it take itself serious. We laugh at the characters because they are exaggerations of stereotypes.
Not to say there isn't some social commentary. I'd mention them, but I figure anyone who watches a Troma film looking for a profound statement about society shouldn't be watching a Troma film in the first place.
In the end, this movie is what you'd expect from Troma; a laugh with side helpings of sex and violence.
7/10
The Third Wheel (2002)
Could've been better, I'll tell you why
Warning: Concept Summary (Nothing you won't know after watching the trailer)
A homeless man tags along on the first date and tries to help Luke Wilson's character make the date go well. It's a typical romantic-comedy with a twist set-up. And it could've been a heck of a lot better.
Warning: Slight Spoilers
1.You don't really like the characters.
They are not only not likable, they're not even consistent. The main male character is introduced as a generous, sensitive guy. Then he transforms into a bastard on the first date. The female lead is introduced as a no non-sense working woman who isn't afraid to speak what's on her mind. Then she suffers quietly on the date. And both their intelligences seem to jump from stupid-as-rocks to being able to make great leaps of logic beyond what is humanly possible.
2. The script isn't well written.
In a good script, there is nothing that doesn't serve a purpose. If it doesn't move the story forward or build character, it is cut. In one of the opening scenes, the main character gives a donut to a sleeping homeless man. His chubby co-worker sneaks back and steals the donut. We never see his co-worker again. Or the homeless man. Or the donuts. Why is this scene in the movie? It's just a cheap gag that goes nowhere. It's almost as if the script is distracted by cheap gags.
3. Direction and Editing
Editing could've been tighter and the character inconsistency is the fault of the Director. Even with the script being what it was, a different Director could've made it something something solid, and a good Editor could've made it much a much stronger film.
I give it a 4/10. Pity, it could've made 7/10.