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How Is That for a Monday? (2023)
Thought the high rating here would translate
...to a good movie.
WRONG!!!
Unspeakably bad writing. Several plot elements were outrageously absurd. Very poor acting. (A couple flubs in line delivery.)
And it just kept getting worse and worse.
Occasionally had the characters speak Hindi with no subtitles. I had to manually turn that on.
Something in the plot was very important. It never explained why, though.
A baffling plot element at the very end that also had no explanation or reasoning.
Sloppy police procedure. Don't think ATMs can ID counterfeit bills. Why didn't that manager call the cops? Stupid bad guys. How'd they even find the manager? Time gap near the end that made no sense.
Pointless credit sequence at the end.
If there was a law preventing someone from making a movie, it should be applied ot the director/writer. One star for this was generous on my part.
(I had an Indian-American friend who was in the US for about 30 years. Even still, he didn't understand a lot about America. This movie reminded me of him.)
Snowtown (2011)
Teen guy sucked into a series of murders...
...in a white trash Australian community. Based on true events.
The guy and his younger brothers are molested. Guy is raped by his older brother. Then 30-something man in a relationship with the kid's mother manipulates kid into murders (with two other men) of supposed pedos with two other men.
Felt as if it was a good director hamstrung by budget and time. Very slow but moody. Grim. The actor as the ringleader was effective and chilling (Daniel Hensal). Charming and then casually murderous. Odd as serial killers usually work alone.
Kind of redundant but wasn't bothersome. Two characters shaved their heads, for some reason, for two scenes. Then then the next scene they had a full head of hair.
Very detached from the characters and their workings. Subsequently read that it happened over a few years. That the ringleader was beaten and raped as a boy. Neither points were in the movie.
Dark Crimes (2016)
Will I ever learn?!
Disgraced police detective in Poland tries to prove a murder by an author who has details of the crime in his book.
Should have known better but liked the look of it. Rated poorly on imdb, though, and for some good reasons. Jim Carrey doing an iron curtain accent. A Polish director who didn't have a handle on English vs Polish. A few scenes came off as a little silly.
Even the character makes a major stupid mistake at the 3rd act. And his boss runs with it. Plot points were vague vs a prostitute character. Carrey's rival's crimes were vague. Carrey's character did something very much out of character and quickly.
Will I ever learn?!
Hud (1963)
A'hole Hud clashes with his father...
...on the farm in a small town as they are hung out to dry with problems with their cattle.
Have to think it inspired The Power of the Dog and Benny C's part in that.
Quickly established the asshole-ism and selfishness of Newman. Took a little bit to show the hate his father had for him. Quickly established the urgency of the threat they're under but took a bit to drown them in it.
During such it felt just like some good acting and conflict but also felt like it was just marking time to the end. Sure, there were faint shades of regret from Newman. The end was just matter-of-fact, though. Only one character changed.
The Takeover (2022)
Netherlands hacker movie on Netflix.
20-something chick hacker with a conscious on the run from killers and she doesn't know why.
Lots of runnin' around with her skinny legs and an involuntary dude. Kind of a sanitized family version of the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and a '90s action movie for the absurd ending. If you see it, let's just say that even before computers, elevators had emergency brakes, so...
I've seen Danish movies but the language in this sounded, to me, really weird. Apparently they use a lot of English computer words in Netherlandism. Netherish?
Smile (2022)
Young lady therapist workaholic...
...witnesses a suicide of a young woman who thinks something is following her. Hilarity ensues.
Borrows heavily from the skeleton of It Follows. The lead was effective at being scared all the time. Some
Wanders excessively, though. You eventually learn the pattern of it all but also seems to deviate from the rules they set down. Visually the last act is interesting but the logic isn't there so much. One big scene omission just before the last act.
Apparently it was slated to open only on Paramount +, where I saw it, but it tested well and was released theatrically and has done $100M so far. Ironic as another superior movie was released there only.
Cashback (2006)
The ending fell apart
An art student, smarting from a break-up and insomnia, takes a night job at a UK supermarket. Oh, and he can stop and start time.
Very artistic in its presentation with a good chunk of detail to the direction. Well written with interesting voice overs. Familiar characters, sure, but everything's already been done. Some lighthearted moment that broke from the serious tone.
Thought his stopping time was subjective but I guess it was literal for the character. Felt like it fell apart 30 minutes 'til the end as the "all is lost" moment was very forced and the ending was rushed.
Apparently was an 18-minute short beforehand and then the rest of the movie was built around it. Thus, the footage from the short is within the movie.
Touch of Evil (1958)
Watched on the new technology called "Laser Disc."
Yes, I actually have one and it still works...by and large. Haven't seen a movie on it in a few years, though.
Car bombing just over the border of Mexico and the subsequent investigation.
Impressive opening long shot and quickly (almost too quickly) we're in the investigation. Felt too fast initially as we're quickly intro'd to several interesting characters. Err'd too much on a lot of information vs character development. Heston and Leigh were two dimensional. Ridiculous as Heston was a Mexican official with zero accent. Leigh was a strong character but still relegated, by the end, to damsel in distress.
Wells' character had a bit of depth and duality, though. Good conflict in the end.
Nymphomaniac: Vol. I (2013)
Extended Director's Cut
Woman beaten found by lone older man. He takes her in and she recounts her life as a nympho.
Not sure what to think. Interesting although the characters are not really that. Her stories go back to another, much younger actress. I really didn't see the character as one who would be able to attract so many men. Men loved her---vs being some sex object---in this and I didn't see why.
I'd assume Von Trier is a very smart person. But clearly also mentally ill. So it felt like this was all over the place. Smart dialogue between Charlotte Gainsbourg and Stellan Skarsgård. (Odd as the apartment set they were in was very run down. Rotten wallpaper. Not really consistent with the character and often was distracting.)
Then it was extremely graphic sexually, especially near the end, which made it feel cheap. Antichrist was graphic and served the story well.
Shai LaBeauf did a good job with relatively little to work on. Christian Slater did a passable job with much more to work with. Uma Thurman was good but her sequence was too long and thus redundant.
A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night (2014)
Never says vampire
Young lady vampire stalks a small Iranian town at night. (Town called Bad City that dumps their dead in a trench by the bridge. Never explained why. Other than that, the town had nothing too quirky about it.)
Okay, this is a bit complicated on the production end. First feature from a UK-born young Iranian lady person director/writer who shot this in the desert in California. It's all in Farsi.
Has a very nice look in b&w. Director Amirpour good at setting a mood. But the whole thing is VERY slow. Felt very much like it was made by a moody 20-something lady person.
Some good characterizations and plot developments on paper. Young guy has a junkie father. Vampire who is conflicted. Dead-end hooker. But it's VERY f'ing slow, even for 101 minutes.
Rated well on imdb. (Well, 6.9 vs the good reviews it had.) For those who saw it or will see it, has a scene similar to something in Fight Club. It borrows heavily from the look and feel of Eraserhead. This is the director's first feature. She did a follow up, also in the desert.
Started it surprised as it looked like an American town. Hoping for some insight into the people of Iran, like we're all the same, by and large.
Stopped after 20 minutes and read it was filmed in the S California desert. Kind of took me out of it all knowing that, as I've been around there many times. Had very little to do with Iran, as I could see, so didn't know why it was in Farsi. Doubt it'd had an audience in any Muslim country. Probably not even allowed there. Most of the actors were American born.
(There is a small part of film with Indian actors in Hindi but filmed in the US. For the Indian audiences here. And one recently from China that was filmed here. Kinda big in China. Then there was a dragon movie a few years ago made by a Korean company but shot in L. A. I'm sure there's others.)
Everly (2014)
Hooker trapped against her will...
...for 4 years fights and shoots it out with Japanese gangsters.
Really good shoot-'em-up from the director of the very good subsequent Mayhem, Joe Lynch. Bloody but cartoonish.
Well shot (no pun intended) and moves quickly. Good character development but focused adrenaline. She has a mom and daughter. So lots of family emotion bouncin' around.
A vast majority in one big room/apartment. A few plot holes to keep things moving.
There was a little girl in it and was not too fond of her around the fake gore. But seemed like they tried and direct her eyes away from it.
It's only rated 5.1 on imdb. Not a fair number. I'd do 9. It's quirkly like the Crank movies.
Nymphomaniac: Vol. II (2013)
The Extended Director's Cut.
Well, definitely something that would warrant conversation vs what was shown and the questions and themes that it brought up.
Von Trier creates many interesting scenarios but he's given free reign, which I don't think at times services the audience or even his "vision" very well.
Didn't need to be as graphic as it was. Came off as cheap and pandering. For instance, Antichrist was graphic and it served the movie well.
The sequence with the black brothers was kind of racist.
As a character, Gainsbourg wasn't very interesting, especially the young version. SUDDENLY she's a master of male behavior for the final long act. None of that was clear, early on. By and large, I saw an empty addict for most of it.
Dafoe recruiting her for her "skills" was a stretch. But after that, it was interesting. Then the long game of having a "heir" was intriguing but was also a stretch at the same time.
Gainsbourg's character going into the sex business was never considered, which I found highly unlikely.
The abortion scene was horrid, along with what she did to herself in the long run.
I was expecting her father (Slater) to be a molester, which didn't happen. At least it would've made sense vs her behavior. But yes, it would also have been cliché.
Thoughout, Skarsgård being a surprise bad guy was in my head based on the surroundings of that dreary apartment. But his mannerisms didn't foreshadow that. So when that turned out to be the case, I was disappointed, as nothing else said such. Which made me think that the character was Von Trier's likely perversions and him condemning himself for it. Her shooting him was a big jump, too.
Von Trier is a smart guy and creative, too. But he's not equipped to manage that into effective filmmaking, at times.
Lucky (2017)
A happy accident
Stanton in the title role of a 90-year-old loner in a present-day small town and the low-key townsfolk in his life.
Felt like a happy accident as it was so slow and not urgent in any way. But powerful as it felt like great swan song to the actual person's very long life. Clearly was structured around the man himself. Said living any life that long is worthy of respect and awe.
Directed well by 1st timer and long-term character actor John Carroll Lynch. (No relation to co-star, director David Lynch.) Some good writing and dialogue. Stanton was good but his age and exhaustion levels were clear. Good c-list co-stars.
This was Stanton's last movie as he died before it was released.
The Power of the Dog (2021)
Redundant anger with Cumber-bun
Well-written, interesting characters. Story-wise, it frequent dropped the ball and felt incomplete. Benny's anger was intriguing and I wanted to know why.
Then I saw why about an hour in but was puzzled why he was both vindictive towards his brother and abnormally attached to him at the same time. I have some ideas but wasn't sure. Granted, it was from a book (which I didn't read) and internal motivations are hard to display on screen.
Benny was also hostile toward the kid but then did an about face after the kid saw him swimming. It would have been more consistent for him to try to get close to the kid beforehand.
Benny's brother's marriage and relationship took second fiddle to Benny's redundant anger issues. The kid himself was intriguing but the character was finite.
Not even any subplots to speak of. They were in that other town for an extended period of time but wasn't defined. Just to make way for 25 ways to show that Benny's character is an asshole.
Then the ending was cursory and vague to me. I'm thinkin' that the kid was at fault on purpose but he was still conflicted about it all.
Running Time (1997)
Why wasn't Bruce Campbell more famous?
Real time "one take" (saw the cuts) of a guy out of jail, a heist and the aftermath. Subplot of an ex high school girlfriend.
Total running time was 70 minutes, so about 65 was the movie.
Very good experiment. Moved well and no real dead spots. The love story subplot worked well, although it was accelerated.
Still don't know why Bruce Campbell didn't make it big like Harrison Ford, Clooney or Pitt. Would have made a great Indiana Jones. Would have been perfect for the Oceans movies.
Although this was made in '97, is a good reason for Netflix-like entities to consider movies shorter than 90 minutes. A few, as of late, are out there. So many films feel too long. Likely 'cause I know the formula and want to jump forward, more times than not.
Slow West (2015)
Many original elements
Irish 16-year-old kid makes way across the old west with the help of a jaded gunslinger to find the girl he loves. Oh, and the girl and her father are wanted, dead or alive. You find out why a ways in.
Better than average for the genre. A good chunk just vignettes of the journey but most had interesting angles to them. Not quite Cohn Brothers but a good attempt.
Smit did kid over-his-head well but not much more to work with. (He is an Aussie doing---apparently---an Irish accent which I could barely hear. Mostly sounded 'merican.) A character somewhat similar to his Way of the Dog role.
Some good camera work, especially at the end. Shot in New Zealand. It's PURR-DEE there.
I guess an arc for Fassbinder but he was really at that point throughout.
Mildly surprised the director/writer hasn't done anything else since 2015. This was a pretty good calling card and his only feature.
Gone in the Night (2022)
Ridiculous ending
Winona goes up to a cabin with her boyfriend and they find it's double booked with a creepy young couple. Morning and when she was sleeping, the young girl and Ryder's boyfriend ran off together, as told (not seen) by the young girl's boyfriend. Winona believes it but invariably tries to investigate.
Even though it has a 4.9 on imdb, the lyin' trailer conned me, packed full of stellar reviews.
Well, at 60 minutes, I guessed it all, by and large. Up 'til then it was intriguing as it also flashed back to things outside of Ryder's knowledge, which was odd.
But with 10 minutes to go, it SUDDENLY turned unintentionally very comical. Ryder ain't winning any awards anytime soon but she isn't bad. Mulroney is usually good.
Suddenly it was very bad acting, though. Yikes!
There was a hot 20-something gal in it.
I might have known, too, as it was from Vertical Entertainment. Some companies are reliable and some aren't vs quality of the production. Vertical isn't.
The Girl with All the Gifts (2016)
The ending really stumbled
Apocalypse at a UK military base as fast zombies swarm and a young girl, a teacher, a scientist and a soldier escape.
Girl is a sometimes uncontrollable zombie as she was born from zombies. Scientist needs girl for a cure for the zombie fungal infections, but that means killing the young darling. Teacher is sympathetic to the girl. Soldier is a bitter asshole.
Girl helps save the others a few times while eating a cat and a pigeon. But she's still a danger if she gets hungry.
Odd and vague ending. Likable characters you've seen before. Scenarios you've seen before. Urgent peril, though, but no ticking clock. Upper end of production values.
Apparently Close did it as her sister is a big zombie movie fan.
Significant Other (2022)
A new take on the monster movie
Comet comes down in the woods. An odd tentacle grabs a deer. Couple hike in the same woods.
Kind of slow for 30 minutes as we go through her anxiety and panic attacks and him wanting to marry her. The gal from It Follows. He's a good character actor.
Something happens then and about another 10 minutes until two good twists in a row. More running around and a unique but brief final battle. Opens itself up wide for a sequel at the end.
Brief but effective character sketches that accentuate the emotional. Slow pace, though, and nothing remarkable about the directing from the two who also wrote/directed the very good Villains. But their writing in this was good.
Jerry & Marge Go Large (2022)
"Inspired" by a true story. On Paramount +.
Retired math wiz figures out how to beat the lottery, but it took a lot of elbow grease.
Feel-good family movie with little or no urgency or peril. Just recounting (no pun intended) the process and how he helped his town. Put some jazz into his marriage. Helped him learn how to connect with his son.
I've not checked the ages of the real people but although Cranston is very good, he seemed to force an old guy persona. Benning was also very good as the scrappy wife who looks forward to this adventure. Wilson was the colorful liquor store owner..
Annihilation (2018)
Garland does a good job setting mood and pace
Remote part of the US is hit with a comet and the area is weirdsville. Portman and the gals go in to look around.
Garland does a good job setting mood and pace, although this is very slow and methodical. The situation and story are urgent. The characters are interesting and you care about them. Good actors but not really that much to work with.
It was very methodical and self-indulgent. You learn very early on the fate of the characters, by and large. So it's just waiting to find out how this and that happened. A surprising plot point that farted out. The ending was vague.
I was surprised at Garland's short directing resume. I remember not being bowled over at Ex Machina but would like to see Men. He's also a novelist so that might be using tools that work in books but not in movies.
Stalker (1979)
I was not mesmerized but did appreciate the artistry.
20 years ago, a meteor hit and a large swath of land is off limits as people who go in don't come out. A Stalker (guide) takes a Writer and a Professor into it as there is a room inside it all where dreams are granted.
Looked great in a bleak way as it started off in browns (or copper) and greys (sepia) in a dreary city and then striking colors in the "Zone" or where they went. Good writing but was hampered by being in Russian, which I find grating.
Very much seemed like an elaborate stage play. Tarkovsky set a very thick effective tone. Each scene seemed tense. Minimalist as it had no special effects, although a sci-fi movie.
But despite it's advantages and a scene where they're shot at, there really is no peril. Inferred but that's not enough. No bad guy other than their dark sides, which gives me a "meh" feeling.
Also, the monologues wander and don't really latch onto a throughline. I can appreciate giving time to letting a scene "breathe," but was too long for its own good at 2 hours and 40 minutes.
Ends up being, in the end, a wrestling match between faith and selfish pursuits. Nevermind that it's about a man of faith taking two selfish men to a room to get their wishes granted.
This is after seeing Annihilation, with a similar spine. Although Annihilation is based on a book (and this is, too), I can't see where Stalker didn't have some influence. Like the comparisons of Japan's Battle Royale movies and The Hunger Games.
The camera movement made me think of what Wes Anderson does so well.
Saw it on YouTube without commercials. Then saw Solaris is available, too. I'm a bit burnt on iron curtain cinema for awhile but will likely see Solaris. Think I saw the remake, but can't remember.
VFW (2019)
Geezer action, '80s style
Teenage girl with stolen drugs stumbles into a VFW post chased by bad guys. Ex-geriatric soldiers kill them and save the girl. Bad guy sends more attackers.
Several C-list old guys you'd recognize with B-movie credits. Set in the '80s (probably due to cell phones) and has that '80s B-movie feel with lots of killing and lots of blood. Like John Carpenter's Assault on Precinct 13 or Death Wish 4. The old farts sold the violence well but sometimes didn't.
The gore meant to be graphic but was still kind of pedestrian, though. Odd mindset of the characters in the final 2 minutes. Probably meant to capitalize on Stephen Lang (in this) in Don't Breathe (2016) and the Expendable franchise.
Attack the Block (2011)
Very surprised it was so disappointing.
Started off on a very bad tone (although right wingers unfortunately would like it) with a group of 4 black and 1 white ghetto teens robbing a white woman at knife point. An alien immediately drops from the sky, attacks the black leader and then runs away.
The leader then decides to chase and kill it, which he does. It struck me as a very blood-thirsty thing to do.
Eventually more aliens follow as the 5 kids and the white woman have to team up.
The intent was to make the kids heroic and regret their robbin' ways. That was much later and cursory. What the audience ended-up with was stupid kids whose dialogue I couldn't understand 80% of the time. And the tone was off as bloody things happen and it's all suppose to be a fun journey.
The Lost City (2022)
Fun but familiar
Sandra Bullock's successful romance writer (and failed archeologist) is kidnapped by Daniel Radcliff's bad guy richy rich to help find treasure on a tropical island before the volcano goes boom. Airhead model for her books Channing Tatum comes to the rescue with the help of cameo Brad Pitt.
Funny and entertaining but smaller in scope than I thought. Does very much copy the template of Romancing the Stone, though, as often has been said. Da'Vine Joy Randolph was the Danny DeVito character. Pitt was the Michael Douglas character but was "replaced" with Tatum. I read Ryan Reynolds was going to do the character first but didn't happen. Tatum, though, did a good job lampooning his tough guy cliche.