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GLOW: The Libertines (2019)
Totally irrelevant
Slowly as series progressed more and more gay stuff was added.
Well for this episode it became one big perversion, attacking all layers of society, husbands having a go with man, other husbands enjoying gay clubs, leasbian freedom and most of all hard to stand drag queen character.
How does that fit the plot of Woman wrestling story, based on true events?
It does not, I have read looked up everywhere, the gays stuff is all made up and it is suddenly there... just because.
But this "just because" is there to help normal people switch lanes and give in to all the dirt.
Totally irrelevant episode to somewhat cool series.
The Mother (2023)
Jenny wants to be an action star
Famous people often consider themselves being capable of doing anything there is.
Pure example that this is not true is The Mother movie.
First time, I see a double used for running in straight line, I guess that Jenny from the block was not able to run or got tired.
When this is so, imagine the camera flickering for each action scene there is in the movie. I am sure they had hard time filming this and also hard time trying to put this together.
I am happy, I don't have to work for Jenny.
You can see her in the poster, looking though, but if you take a closer look, you will see that mainly she looks pretty.
She did good for this by the way, being stranded in Alaska, working as a hunter - brand new fancy coat, a lot of make up, hair looks as if she just came out of the hairstylist. As a person who have lived in Alaska, I will tell you that there are no such things, the buauty is in the nature and people are not about appeal and they are tough for real.
Also for the other scenes, she is wearing sunglasses in the evening - looks so cool. Of course there is a sports bra scene show off and etc.
If she wants to show how cute and sexy she is, here is a better script that will fit her better.
Jenny is stranded on a lonely island. Suddenly a castaway ship of whole team of basketball players crash there.
At first things go smooth, she welcomes them there and explains the surroundings and they light a fire and tell stories.
Day 2 - she starts making love to each and evey one of them.
Day 3 - she keeps making love to each and every one of them.
Day 4 - more love making.
Day 5,6,7,8,9 - same thing.
Day 10 - the cast away basketball players, realize they can't keep up with her, they try to say "No!"
Day 11 - The twist - Movie turns into a thriller, she does not take "No" for an answer!
Day 12 - If you have read this far, this means I am right and you agree!
Pearl (2022)
Friday horror movie night - turned out as a youtube ad
You just sit down and await some cheap thrills that you can only get from a low-budget horror movie with 4-5 actors and 2-3 sets.
Suddenly the small crew decide to make a business card for their lead actress, thinking that this is a oscar worthy performance, the way is now paved.
And reading some of the comments, it worked for some of the low IQ users here.
There is nothing oscarish here, yeah Mia Goth is a good actrees and her performance is alright.
The movie has one idea and it is to show how skilled someone is.
The story could have been deeper but no time was left because it had to show 5 minute long monologues of Mia Goth.
Black Adam (2022)
Everything, everywhere, all in 2 hours and most of it does not click.
By everything and everywhere I mean that there is:
1. A family drama - twice!
2. A kid which connects with the hero, quite fast, even though they have 5000 years between them.
3. Heroic sacrifice.
4. A twist.
5. Superhero team up
6. Undead zombies massive fight scene attempt
7. Humor
8. Some 5000 year lore dating before the Pyramids
Usually this sounds like the perfect blockbuster formula.
For me it did not work since in order to have all this you need 3-4 movies to have the time to make it all work.
I give it a 7, because the action, the effects and the pace of the movie - worked and was nice.
Fortitude (2015)
Do believe the negative reviews!
I completed the show, something now I rarely ever do with movies at all.
If I get the feeling that it is no good... I stop it right away.
Fortitude managed to fool me tho, it gives this idea that eventually there is a plan to all this and a badass ending awaiting.
Not really!
Still it fooled me to watch it to the end, thats why it get a 7.
Firestarter (2022)
Same story
I feel like each time they adapt a Stephen King material,
when they reach filming the ending each time they say:
"Okay everyone, lets wrap this up in 15 minutes!"
And by that I mean the editing, filming, script...
For those 15 minutes you receive 30 minutes of movie time which is... this.
Dexter: New Blood (2021)
Just when you thought they couldn't mess up the ending more...
9 out of 10 because, I just love this character and the series but...
To keep it short the new episodes are great typical Dexter style.
But the ending is just trash... I mean I am fine with the main character dying,
but the events that lead to his demise were rushed and out of place.
I mean killing your father just like that would never ever happen this way.
Even if you are a psycho killer you just don't pick up the rifle like that and shoot.
Work needed to be done just to increase the pressure between the father and son in order to make sense.
Dexter started his killings by killing a dog, Harrison started by killing his father.
Nah, I don't believe it.
P. S.
The Batista story doesn't make any sense either and was left incomplete just like that.
Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City (2021)
Leon S. Kennedy review
So we've dealt with Anderson's ignorance of the games MAIN MAIN MAIN character in the most rude take. Along comes Robetrts, raising a banner that he is gonna stay true to the games.
To keep this short it is enough the review just one character real quick.
I repeat, Leon is a main man, not just anyone.
*Leon S Kennedy doesn't look like him - okay fine, but why?
When you are adapting a movie, all the fans expect to see their favourite character as accurate as possible to the animation.
Otherwise why watch the movie at all?
*Leon is a sleepy dork, who is scared, hopeless, irresponsible, clumsy and his body count equals 2.
A minor change here and there is fine but this is too much.
It's like creating a Rocky reboot but in the reboot he is a ballerina instead.
This is not how you welcome Hardcore Resident Evil fans to the franchise.
The Guilty (2021)
The ultimate Gyllenhaal performance gets 4
If not for him, it's total 0 for me.
I know that this is a remake but Netflix has resources to take it further,
than movie shot in 3 rooms and some flashes.
At least they could have shot a court room ending not just a 5 lines radio news.
The 3 rooms, the 1 actor and the 5 voice actors are doing their best, but after an hour it gets boring waiting for something to happen.
Yeah, there is a cliffhanger but still, 2-3 more places to film and it could've been way better.
My Son (2021)
Lazy movie making
I would keep it short and just talk about how this concludes.
It seems that they filmed an ending for this movie, but they skipped filming what was before the ending. Instead they played a radio broad (2 sentences) telling about that. Last 10 years low budget movies and 70% of Netflix movies just skip filming any ending to all their movies. You know what they say - "Ambiguity" - Viewers have to chance to figure out what happens in the end.
My son, gives you a new trend (I hope they don't make it a Trend for real)
you see the ending, but you have to imagine what happend 2-3 days before that.
She Dies Tomorrow (2020)
No tomorrow, the movie died in 5 minutes...
First five minutes go like this:
Static camera left to film a slighly open door and a guy hitting the floor with a chair and raging.
Goes to next scene, static camera films a girl getting up from a couch and walks to the balcony(camera keeps staying static) she reaches the balcony - dramatic devine music plays for some reason and you see the movie title.
Static camera for 3-4 scenes, she opens the door, walks into a room, static camera films her dress,shoes,face etc.
Finally camera moves just so you can see how she feels a glass of water.
Do I need to tell more? Should you see the rest of the movie, with these cheesy tricks to get your attention and feel some sort of presssure?
Guy leaves his phone on a cabinet to record stuff and tells a girl to walk or drink water.. calls himself a director. I'll pass!
His Dark Materials (2019)
Brace yourself! The fate of everything we know is in the hands of Children
I must say that I've never seen such plot lately. By lately I mean in the last hour or so. Nothing new, a girl is missing her daddy, her friends are missing their daddies.
Their daddies are missing their daddies.
This goes is the story for 70% of the time.
The other 30% is that whatever matters in the movie is in the hands of some unknown gift of our tennager protagonist.
I can't wait for all the episodes to come, just to see how in the end we MIGHT understand what her gift is and how she will make a poker face and beat everyone in a snap of a finger.
Congratulations on bringing type of movie, finally I can re-watch - Stranger Things, Godzilla - King of monsters, Godzilla vs Kong, Ender's Game, the new Power Rangers, the new Mutants, the Witcher, The Girl with all the gifts, Kick-Ass 1,2, Pacific Rim 2 etc...
I can't wait for them to copy-paste such scripting into the Lord of the rings, Game of thrones, The godfather, Shawshank Redemption, Mission Impossible...
Cuz I guess this is all that's left.
IO (2019)
Another sci-fi Netflix...
Flick in which when you watch the trailer it seems so promising and massive.
In the end, it's 90 minutes of 2 people talking in different rooms.
Nothing more to add here actually, so that is the end of the review.
The Invisible Man (2020)
I give +1 only because of one smart decision.
Since the "monster" in this is invisible, in order to make it scary, I guess the director decided to cast Elisabeth Moss. She can really be in a horror movie without make up or a mask. It's frustrating to look her in the face, such an ugly face taking a lead role in a horror movie all this combined with bad acting, plot holes, stupid decisions etc. makes it a real horror like experience but in real life for the viewer - it takes time to recover. Because all that I give 2 out of 10.
Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)
Monsters movie or a Family soap opera.
Previously we had 3 great lead actors - 2 scientist and a military guy. Good performances by the actors as well.
Here all evolves around mother daughter issues, the mother wants to destroy the world and just like most movies in recent years - Guess who saved the world? It ain't Godzilla, it ain't Kong, it ain't any adult person - It was a Kid (I am glad that at least Marvel somehow were aware not to let somebody come up with the idea of getting back in time to get kid Tony Stark to snap instead) That is it... the rest 90% of the movie you see Vera Farmiga and Millie Brown cry/