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Twisted House Sitter (2021 TV Movie)
7/10
So-bad-it's-good territory
8 August 2021
Oof, I went between a high 6 and a 7 but honestly, this sublime cheese kept me entertained throughout. If you're in need of a popcorn thriller, check this one out! Sure, it's been done before but I'm happy Tubi pulled in all the best obsession tropes to turn out a fun story. I loved it.
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The Breeding (2018)
7/10
Underestimated Art
22 July 2020
The current IMDB rating (4.8) would have you believe this is an unimportant indie film, and while I found it odd and frustrating at first, I would have to say this is an underestimated (and therefore underrated) piece of art.

It's also a timely portrait and a product of racial bias, gay culture and political climate. For that reason I'd highly recommend it to anyone interested in broadening their scope and expanding the parameters of their understanding of current events pertaining to race and LGBTQ+ issues.
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2/10
I'd sell my soul...
16 June 2020
...to get that hour and a half back. I felt like I was working under the table for an oppressive hierarchy (I.e. NO PAYOFF).

Vague echoes of other horror/thrillers got diluted into a high school drama, and no, this isn't even a fraction as entertaining as Mean Girls.

And what was with that ending? It could have slightly salvaged the entire film but without blood, suspense, or dare I say even a hint of malevolence the story threw out baby Molly with the squeaky clean bath water-this probably could have been rated PG.

Skip it.
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8/10
The only atrocity is the bad reviews
12 June 2020
I remember seeing this when it came out and really liking it but it's been awhile and I thought I'd revisit this one. Guess what? Still holds up. I didn't even see it in 3D. Just a plain old rental.

It's a fun ride! If you're expecting more from a slasher you might look elsewhere. I personally enjoyed not having to think too much while watching. The gore is everything I wanted from a horror film and the kills were on brand.

It's a little more polished than the gritty original and even the remake, but I'd go as far as to say this is an enjoyable stand-alone.
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Nurse (2013)
7/10
I just think people don't get it
21 April 2020
I was put off of seeing this for a long time because of the bad reviews. That's a shame. This was super entertaining. Paz is fascinating to watch, and I think her character is acting like a bad actress. She's actually a pretty convincing psychopath. She's not as much of an antihero as, say, Katharine Isabelle in American Mary and the story has its weak points and there's a lot of CG blood but as a horror it's mostly pretty effective. 6.7/10
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9/10
The Cult of Tsukiko
25 February 2020
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say Tsukiko's Curse will become a cult classic (if it's not already). It's a concise (only 6 episodes, or 7 if you count that one of the episodes at the midpoint is broken up into two shorter segments), low budget orgy of occult imagery, eroticism, and dark humor. The acting is pretty solid considering the subject matter, and it has all the twists and turns that big budget series nowadays are pretty much obligated to include.

Fever Dreams has a cult classic on its hands, and I also look forward to their series Voodoo Church, should it ever see the light of day...
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Magic Magic (2013)
7/10
I've been hypnotized.
5 August 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Have you ever been simultaneously submerged in and alienated from the lives of people you had no choice but to stick it out with? If so, you'll completely identify with the subject of this film.

Obviously heavily influenced by early Romero, this film pushes the boundaries of the paranoid and appeals to the higher senses through anthropology, topography, and base instincts.

If you've seen and enjoyed Juno Temple in such extreme character studies as Kaboom and Cracks, you may find yourself frazzled by her as Alicia, a young woman thrust unwittingly into a world of subtle heartbreak and uneasiness. I kept pulling for her to lash out at her manipulators, but in the end her mind was too weak.

If you enjoy Michael Cera, you may hate him after this film. Conversely, if you hate Michael Cera, do not watch this film. He'll ruin it for you.

You've been warned.
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V/H/S/2 (2013)
4/10
Not a total waste of time, but close.
17 June 2013
Don't be mislead by the fact that this film has a higher rating on IMDb than VHS. The reviewer who stated this movie "crackles with originality" needs a dictionary--or a lobotomy. And who needs the characters to be "likable"? This is a HORROR FILM.

I was going to give VHS2 3/10 but added a star for the gore, which makes the film worth a once-over. The rest is predictable, absurd, and ANYTHING but original.

A last word: Zombie culture ran out of gas the day the remake of Dawn of the Dead came out. Strapping a camera to one's head doesn't make it cutting-edge.
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7/10
A field day, indeed...
24 April 2013
That this film garners one terrible review after another is beyond me. Viewers must have turned up to see BB's nipples and left sorely disappointed.

In truth, A Coeur Joie (A Field Day aka Two Weeks in September) is a searing portrait of a young woman trying desperately to cling to reality whilst being swept away in the frivolity of a passionate affair abroad.

The angst drummed up by Bardot's Cecile is both stirring and utterly jarring. Has the story been told before? Sure. Has the story been told like this? Not through the eyes of such vulnerable avatars. The dialog beckons you to read between the lines. Every subtlety is captured almost impeccably from start to finish.

When the spell is broken in the last frame you are very nearly left as breathless as Cecile.

This celluloid gem glitters as it's all-but-forgotten like the best diamonds in the rough.
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