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The Last Days on Mars (2013)
Zombie Apocalypse on Mars!
I thought the movie was awesome. The sci-fi aspects of it were intelligent and believable. Action was good. It was visually pleasing. Some are comparing it to Alien and Prometheus, but it was completely different. Prometheus was intellectually insulting. This movie was more like 28 Days Later except on Mars and the contagion was alien. If you're a fan of zombie movies you will enjoy this. If you're a scifi fan you'll probably also enjoy it. It was a believable zombie flick without using the word "zombie." The action wasn't as extravagant because they were a smaller group of people on Mars, but it was dark and suspenseful. Acting was good. For the genre it's targeting, I give it a 9. If you aren't a fan of zombie or scifi movies, you probably won't like it.
World War Z (2013)
Best Zombie Movie Ever Made
This is the best zombie movie ever made up to this point. Really, nothing more needs to be said. Watch it, you will not be disappointed. Some seem to be disappointed because the movie doesn't perfectly follow the book it's based on. I haven't read the book so I don't care :) From a completely unbiased perspective I loved it. I am someone who is addicted to zombie movies and other post-apocalyptic thrillers. I've seen them all and typical of genre aficionados I nit pick them to death. There really isn't much to nitpick about this one. The acting is great, characters believable, and things are visually pleasing, it's really not gory at all, and the plot is smart and makes sense. The movie is unique in that it's quite believable. For example, it doesn't have the typical zombie pitfalls of not explaining common sense things, like, why people getting splashed by blood aren't being infected. Not saying holes can't be poked in some of the science, as much as one can expect from a zombie movie, however, it made sense. Watch and enjoy.
Sharknado (2013)
Where is the Sharknado?
I was extremely excited for this movie, as were a lot of other people apparently. The concept behind the movie was awesome, so much so that I doubt the creators realized it would generate so much interest. Perhaps they would have put in a little more effort otherwise. It is literally the worst-filmed movie I have ever seen. Kids in college working on school projects submit far better work to Sundance. This thing is bad! And it's so bad that it's more frustrating than funny, because the concept actually has real potential. If the concept were given to someone like Quentin Tarantino this could have been a real fun Grindhouse-style flick.
I have so many issues with this movie not sure where to start. I'll try to break it down.
- It looks like it was filmed with a 90's home cam corder. Even in the same scene when they change angles the lighting clearly doesn't match up. It's like they had only two cameras available and they were completely different crappy models and they couldn't get the lighting to match and also didn't know how to fix it digitally afterwards.
- Regardless of the camera quality, the cinematography is just plain bad. In a single scene the camera angle bounces all over the place and it's extremely hard to tell what the heck is going on. I think maybe this was aimed at hiding their bad graphics, but it didn't work. We still saw the bad graphics, but were totally disoriented. I mean like there would be a scene where someone is being bit by a shark, but you can't see it happening. Looks like they filmed the movie in a single day and that half of it was constructed using clips of sharks from youtube.
- Wow, bad graphics. Kids with pirated software manage to put together way better graphics than you'll find in this film. As with the camera quality it looks like they have computers and software from the 90s.
- Worst plot ever. With this awesome concept that is the best story they could come up with? Where is the sharknado? The Sharknado is the whole point of the movie, but there is actually very little of this. The tornado comes near the end. And this should be where we get all kinds of carnage, but instead they suspend the action to have some drama and make propane bombs and then fly a helicopter over to the tornado to deliver the bombs, which then cause the tornados to go away? What? No sharks flying around eating people. It's just stupid. I know the movie is stupid and totally unrealistic to begin with, but part of making an unrealistic movie fun and good is building up a realistic plot to support the unrealistic concept. And that means not suspending the laws of physics. Helicopters can't fly into tornados, and bombs, certainly not tiny little propane cans, can't be used to "blow up" a tornado. We wanted to see sharks flying around getting people, not this helicopter nonsense.
- Note I didn't say anything about the acting? Of course the acting was bad, but we expected it to be bad. It was the only thing that lived up to my expectations.
- Side note, what the heck has happened to Tara Reid? She is looking pretty worn these days.
The Deaths of Ian Stone (2007)
Tedious waste of time if you have a brain
The movie starts out very tedious and is confusing with its incessant repetitiveness, watching the main character die over and over again without any idea about what's going on. As you drag on the reason for this becomes clear, the plot makes no sense, so to compensate for this they take huge amounts of time to piecemeal it out... only to finally realize near the end that the plot is actually a very simple and also very stupid vampire rip off. The whole thing is about shape-shifting supernatural beings that exist in another realm and feed off human fear, whatever the heck that even means. Just like we get energy from food, they can get it from eating our "fear." Uh huh. But of course, one of them doesn't like causing us (humans) pain, so he goes to war with his own kind. Sound familiar? The visual quality of the movie is good and the effects aren't bad, acting decent, but the action itself is boring. How many times can you see someone stabbed by a supernatural arm/knife/claw? And not only someone, but the same someone over and over. Given the story I think the director did a good job, but the story is just really bad.
The Call (2013)
OK, Horrible Ending
I got this thing on Red Box and overall I really enjoyed the movie, but, wow, the ending really let me down. It did surprise me, but not in a good way. It's a plot twist only because it makes no sense. I was able to get over the numerous plot holes throughout the movie. Some of the characters behavior doesn't always make sense, especially toward the end, but hey, if you've ever watched Cops or reality TV you know that a lot of people do things that don't make sense. So OK, whatever, I won't get hung up on all those details. However implausible, it could "maybe" happen this way. But the ending? Seriously? The ending is frankly so bad you should consider this before watching it. It will make you mad. I was feeling very satisfied with the whole journey right up to the end, and then bam, now all I can think about is how bad the ending is, it's consuming me, I can't stop thinking about it, make it stop, please! If barney the purple dinosaur were to appear suddenly that would make about as much sense as the ending to this film. In fact, that gives me an idea. If you're going to watch this movie you should have a barney doll and lighter with you. After the ending is over light the barney doll in effigy, you'll feel better, I promise. How can one go through all that effort and jack up the ending so badly? What's the point of a movie screening if you don't screen the movie? Surely they got negative feedback from their screening audiences about this. And no, the DVD doesn't come with alternate endings. There is no imagining it away. You will have nightmares and wish you never saw any of it! OK, perhaps that's an exaggeration, but the ending really is quite lame... ahhhhh!