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sergio-arauzo
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Fanboys (2009)
Only if you think that Han Solo shot first
This is the kind of movie that needs two very different ratings, depending on if you are a true fan of star wars or not. For true fans (like me), the films rates at least a 7. For everyone else, the film rates no more than a 3 or 4. So, if you are a true fan of the saga, you will love this film. It is full of topics, clichés, gags, cameos, and jokes that you will adore, and that you will understand. You will love Kirsten Bell in her Princess Leia costume. You will enjoy the jokes about trekkies. You will understand and laugh with the conversations of the main characters. For everyone else, if you do not know what I am talking about when I say "Han solo shot first", do not go to watch this movie, because you will get disappointed. Or at least, do not do it until you have learned about star wars universe.
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (2006)
Lots of cars but no real people
If you liked the first two movies in the saga, you will probably not like this one. And the reason is that Fast & Furious is not just about fast cars, but about characters with charisma, and their story. Not just nice cars driving as fast as possible by empty - headed characters. You cannot find any single good performance in the whole movie, any single character with at least a gram of personality. The plot is absolutely dumb and predictable and you do not really worry about whatever happens to the characters. You will enjoy this film if you only want to see fast cars, nice women with too small dresses, and techno - music that not fits the scenes. I f you are looking for something more, watch the first movie in the saga.
Heavenly Sword (2014)
Awful
I came to this film because of the games, which I think are good. But this film has only that, a name. When I watch an animation film I expect, nowadays, the graphics will be good, the animations will be smooth, and the faces will show at least some emotion. I have not found any of these in this film. Graphics are very cheap, even pixelated sometimes. Animation seems to come from 10 or 15 years ago. Characters faces are empty of any kind of emotion. So, the technical issue is really bad. I suppose producers thought that with a famous name would be enough, so they decided to spend ass less money as possible here. When we talk about the story or the character development things are only slightly better, but just because it cannot be worse than animation or graphics. Plain characters, no development, plot full of tropes, absolutely predictable. This film is not worth your time.
Dredd (2012)
Much better than 1995 film
When I approached this film a was not very optimistic about it, just because of the awful 1995 version. Stallone film was so weak that I was discouraged about what Hollywood could have done this time. But I was surprised, because this movie is really good and shares only the name with that 1995 horror. It will please Dredd fans but also anyone who like a good action film. Very solid story, with no major holes, good performances of the main characters, excellent combat scenes and some unexpected surprises. Karl Urban is a very solid Dredd, fitting perfectly in the skin of the comic character. Olivia thirtly looks great in her judge clothes and fits very well in their role. A must see for every Dredd fan and every action movie lover.
Machete Kills (2013)
It gives what it offers
This is an honest film. It gives you just what it offers. If you go to see a film called "machete kills", with Danny Trejo you know that you are not going to see "The Godfather". You know that you are going to enjoy hilarious plot, short roles of well known actors and actresses (like Michelle Rodriguez, Jessica alba, or Mel Gibson), lots of bullets, lots of knives, lots of blood, and the firm of Robert Rodriguez, making a film in the line of that 70's B series action movies or the more recent Planet Terror or Grindhouse. If you liked the first Machete film, you will enjoy this one too, even though this is inferior. The film has very good points, like Michelle Rodriguez (always the perfect action woman, who could kick your ass any moment) or Charlie Sheen as The President. It has some weak points too, like Sofia Vergara in a too much maniac role, or Lady Gaga, who just does not fit in the film. Who should watch this film? People who like other Robert Rodriguez films, Danny Trejo, Michelle Rodriguez, Planet Terror and B - series of the 70's and other similar fiction.
Day of the Dead (2008)
Only if you REALLY love bad zombie movies
One of the worst films I have ever watched with an absurd plot full of holes. Just comparing this film with any George Romero film (even the weakest), Resident Evil, 28 Days after or any other good zombie film is offensive. This film has only one thing: The name, which is used to attract Romero fans to this very bad film. We can see zombies with very Cheap make up, I am pretty sure you can see better ones any Halloween. Action scenes are really awful and boring. The actors do not fit in their role. I like Mena Suvari in other films, but she does not fit in her role. You can enjoy some of the dumbest dialog lines of film history, and the story is full of inconsistencies in characters actions, again and again. I mean, it is not just that they are dumb, a lot of characters in horror films are dumb. It is that they are not consistent, they do one thing and the next minute they are doing the opposite for no reason. In addition, yes, they are really dumb. Trust me, there are hundreds of better ways of spending 85 minutes.
Sucker Punch (2011)
Unusual film: Love it or hate it, but must watch it.
This film has very good points: the music, the stenography, the multiple realities approach, Scott glen and Jena Malone. It has very bad points, too, like the main character, Emily browning, anything but an action films actress, who performs horrible in combat choreography. Combat scenes have plenty of special effects, but awful choreography. Do not expect something like Milla Jovovich combat performance. The plot is much more complex than you could expect at first, so if you are looking for some empty, girls with guns, combat movie you will be very disappointed (for instance, if you go to watch the movie because of you like the movie promos and posters). I think the best of this movie is the mix of reality with bizarre action scenes, pretty photography, very adequate music, and some touches of pulp fiction, kill bill and other Tarantino productions. Should you go to watch this movie? I think the answer is YES. Even if you do not like it as a hole you will enjoy, as I have said, good music, nice photography and an unusual production.
The Purge (2013)
Between awful and horrible
What can I say? Stupid characters, lots and lots of plot holes, predictable ending. Interesting initial idea (one night, every year, murder is legal) but stupid justification (so, if you allow them to kill one night, every psychopath, every passion crime, every murder motivated by money...just will not happen the other 364 nights....yeah, it is clear that the director and the writers knows a lot about human psychology). And, hey, we the rich ones, instead of leaving the country for vacations that day, we buy absurdly expensive and in fact completely ineffective security systems. In addition, we do not think about hire some mercenaries to protect our residential area, no, it is much better to give a gun to our absolutely idiot ten year old son. Do not lose your time with this piece of crap.