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Saltburn (2023)
4/10
Boring, shallow and illogical
31 January 2024
I don't think this movie knows what it wants to be. Despite one or two laughs provided by Richard E. Grant the film delivers little else. One or two scenes might be there to shock or they might be there as clues for what ultimately ensues. But it doesn't matter because the main thing missing for all of the characters is motivation. A comment of a mother on her daughter or the daughter on her brother hardly makes up for showing the character in more depth to get a handle on them. And as for the main character, no motivation at all, so you are left at the end with, what was all that nonsense about?
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Oppenheimer (I) (2023)
5/10
Too annoying to be enjoyable
25 July 2023
An intriguing character, an historic time, a chance to show what made the man whose name the film bears, squandered on an overbearing visual and audio production. Loud, building, ever-present music, probably to make up for the lack of dramatic dialogue in the script. No family back-story, none of the quirks of his character as a young man, just a series of short episodes in labs while music plays incessantly and too loudly. Jumping back and forth in time, to create a sense of mystery to demonstrate a great man taken down by pettiness. You can't make this movie without hitting some high notes and the test scene brilliant, and the sense of moral regret is well delivered. But the overall production, especially the editing, and the focus on the 'trial' and the decision to omit the early back-story years, creates a gap that is never quite filled, despite the brilliance of Cillian Murphy portraying a man struggling with the impact of what he has unleashed on the world, not to mention a host of fabulous cameos.
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2/10
A Movie of The Dullards by The Dullards for The Dullards
30 January 2023
Overall a dull experience. Visually captivating but that's about it. Throw in a load of cliches and a really dumb plot and script (nonsense really) and you have a film that is so overrated it will make some people angry. The lines that try to be witty are, to put it mildly, embarrassing. There is plenty of craft on display: the set, constumes, cinematography, some of the acting; but the raw material is just so bad it is cringeworthy. Is this the visual equivalent of the emperor's new clothes? If you are wondering if you don't 'get it', don't worry, there's nothing to get. This film is proof that no-one knows anything.
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The Menu (2022)
6/10
The meal is not as good as the menu
27 January 2023
A good set-up for satire fades away into the realms of cant-be-bothered as as suspension of disbelief appears to be, what, on the wrong side of the 20th century? A little more realism in the aspect of believable characters is propably needed in the 21st century to carry something like this. In a way, the characters seem like blobs of paint splashed onto the canvas of the film and are not shaped into anything with a proper definition, not even the main character for whom we shoudl root. They are overly symbolic, an assembly of caricatures that seem more like marionettes as a backdrop to a what ultimately comes across as an elaborate Ted talk.
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Taboo (2017)
2/10
Struggling to find the positives
30 May 2022
A cast of unlovables wander around a historical setting spouting 21st century language. Rather than generate a sense of menace through acting, the main character does it with some senseless cruelty, so even for a flawed character it's hard to find a hook to latch onto. For all the devices it employs, it comes across as bland. Only watched one season, more than enough.
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4/10
Documents the feeling well, but nowhere near the full story
5 April 2022
Well made and captures the essence of the Revolution very well. But the shadowy figures in the background pulling strings are never examined. Whowere the agitators really? And who were the snipers really? Bordering on propaganda in being so black and white.
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1/10
Bored to Indifference
18 February 2022
Hopelessly generic. The meta story about getting the story just gets in the way and that would be ok if it was well crafted but the script is lame and the direction worse. Whoever made this should never have graduated from making sandwiches.
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The White Lotus (2021–2025)
5/10
Somewhat predictable with scene that should never have been shot
14 February 2022
Dark humour, though more through cringe effect than wit. Visually compelling (great threads man!). Could have been edited to about sixty percent screen time. Unsatisfying ending for a number of reasons but worth a look but for a scene that should never have been shot in episode 6. Just pointless. You are warned.
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Eternals (2021)
1/10
JHC Is this for real?
14 January 2022
OMG. WTF. Did embarrassment just vacate the world? What a appalling load of digested and ejested food. IMDB it's about time you make 0 stars a possibility. This is a watershed moment in cinema reviewing. We need 0 stars now.
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7/10
Understated and finely crafted
29 December 2021
An engaging and well-acted movie that avoids pitfalls that have ruined others that might seem similar. Credit to the director for holding tight on the reins. Good stuff, plenty of depth.
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Love Actually (2003)
2/10
A Compendium of Mush
24 December 2021
The constant score, intended to, ahem, pluck at your heartstrings signals just how shallow this film is. It is a collection of interwoven short stories populated by caricatures, so the need to go deeper never arises, because you already know all about them and how it will all end. Drivel.
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Don't Look Up (2021)
4/10
Had to Look Away
24 December 2021
It tried, oh it tried hard to be funny, but just ended up lame. Tried to tick too many zeitgeist boxes. The script just wasn't there. Who wrote Jonah Hill's part? Embarrassing. Four stars for the idea and the effort, and that's being generous.
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Women of the Night (2019–2020)
5/10
Implausible characters
1 November 2021
Hard to believe in the characters which detracts from the plot which is as much about collusion as the oldest profession. Not helped by some wooden acting. Given all that happens the director fails to generate any tension. This is left to the soundtrack guy. An odd piece of viewing.
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Unforgotten (2015– )
8/10
Excellent Show
21 April 2021
The past catches up with people and wreaks havoc with their current lives. Others get closure. The pace might seem slow to some but I'd call it measured, giving time to reflect on events, possibilities, outcomes. Highly recommended.
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Seaspiracy (2021)
9/10
All your fish are belong to us
8 April 2021
We are conned while the fish are canned. Good exposure of the useless regulation of a corrupt industry whose harm reaches far beyond the what's done out of sight out at sea. What a world we live in! Looking very much like vegetarianism is the only show in town.
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3/10
A TV movie made for cinema seen on TV
31 March 2021
This is at best a TV movie, but it looks from the sets and costumes that it was intended to be a big cinema release. But the pandemic put paid to that. What a relief. It's a dreadful waste of time but the two hours saved from the trip to the cinema is like a 50% refund.
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Peterloo (2018)
6/10
Too much like a history lesson
21 January 2021
This movie should make you want to scream against the system but falls a bit short. Getting inside the heads of the physical perpetrators would have helped. Still, events like this need to be documented so worth a look.
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The Night Manager (2016–2025)
6/10
Good enough, barely.
20 January 2021
Warning: Spoilers
A good enough set up. But main character is vacuous. Little tension built up for the climax and other parts within. Some implausible aspects. You might have to read the book, but for a mini-series there should be enough screen time to do the job. Minor characters have the stronger performances.
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Made in Heaven (2019– )
8/10
Outstanding
11 January 2021
Excellent acting, great story, divisive characters. Riveting.
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La La Land (2016)
8/10
Surprisingly Excellent
6 January 2021
Not really a fan of musicals but this is a great film. Poignant without being mushy.
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3/10
Pointless Epilogue
6 January 2021
This is an epilogue to Breaking Bad but does not deliver anything new, so why was it made now? Somethings are better left alone.
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The Two Popes (2019)
6/10
Where is the main course
6 January 2021
After watching this movie I felt like I had just passed some time eating with entertaining hosts only to be shown the door before the main meal was served. For some vague reason it was unsatisfying. The acting is riveting, but not enough.
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Enola Holmes (2020)
5/10
Fantasy that fails to deliver
6 January 2021
For eight to fourteen year olds this may deliver. Adults in the room may find it as flat as a Tim Burton movie. Have your phone handy.
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Semi-Pro (2008)
2/10
Peurile thrash
4 January 2021
Even twelve year olds would baulk at the childishness of the humour on offer here. Not an elevated joke in sight. True, one or two laughs. But that does not make a movie. Bottom line is that the script itself is not funny.
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The Holiday (2006)
1/10
Too Nice to be Wholesome
28 December 2020
Possibly the lamest script ever. Unless this is your first film, give it a miss. If fact, if it is your first it may well be your last as you may never want to repeat such an awful experience. You are warned.
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