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Reviews
The Island (2005)
Very watchable
By no means a masterpiece, nor an interesting take on the dystopian setting. The Island suffers from the plot moving too quickly for you to care syndrome, action scenes are well done but most of the time I have no idea why anything is even happening.
The first half is good and builds tension, as soon as the great mystery is resolved, however, the plot kicks in at a break neck pace leaving little time to think. The goal of the characters quickly switches by the minute and by the time the plot seems like it is finishing up you realize that there are still ten minutes to go!
Overall, not a bad film for a couple hours of entertainment, there are some good jokes and delivery (mostly from Steve buscemi) but overall the acting is pretty average.
Ashens and the Polybius Heist (2020)
Better than the first, though that isn't saying much.
Once again Ashens graces us with a legit film, featuring more geeky humour than ever before and hoping to dial everything ut to 11 for a knockout sequel.
Fortuneately this film is vastly superior to the first, which was more of an experiment to see if the concept of Stuart Ashen looking for weird put there gaming artifacts would stick. The first, if you remember had some bits that really worked and others that were just cringe inducing, but even so it was recieved well enough for a sequel.
The Polybius Heist already stands on better feet than it's predecessor, the acting has drastically improved across the board (there is an exception I will get to later) and while the overall goal of this film is pretty much the same as the first, the way that goal is written towards is really well done.
Now the acting exception. Daniel Hardcastle is awful in this film, I've no idea how he managed to get into this film, every line he reads is read exactly the same way and similar tone of voice, he cannot do subtlety or even clearly speak.
Red Faction: Origins (2011)
It's ok, not great
I got a kick out of this film because I like the Red Faction IP even though it has been misused twice with RF2 and RF:Armageddon.
A decent enough sci fi film that doesn't do anything new or different or with any real skill. The plot of the film makes a lot more sense if you know the plot of the series or have at least played RF:Guerrilla. Even if you don't or haven't, the film is easy enough to follow, I watched it with my Dad and he was able to follow it from start to finish with little confusion.
The film is very simple and to the point, it's not on the nose and it doesn't try to be any more than it sets out to be. The acting is alright, a little but dry in places and Danielle Nicolet has some very awkward delivery, but it's mostly fine.
The set design is probably the only highlight, while it never really looks like they are actually on Mars, the sets and interiors all have a very gritty working class style to them which fits in very well with the series. Many of the interiors look like factories or unused assembly lines which does lend well to the styles of the games (the good ones).
I mean, I watched it years ago to pass the time and watched it again today for basically the same reason. You're not going to get much out of this film other than some very basic entertainment and even then the amount you get is based heavily on your familiarity with the IP.
For me this film serves as basic entertainment, when I watched it for the first time I was entertained and when I watched it again for this review I was still entertained, I suppose that you should only consider watched this film if you have nothing else to watch and you just want to be flatly entertained but not really amazed or thrilled. It makes good background entertainment.
The Last Days on Mars (2013)
It's good for what it is
This film is not a masterpiece, nor does it pretend to be. It's a simple, bare bones sci-fi horror flick that has good atmosphere and good horror in the obviously inhuman zombies.
There's a small buildup to the events, but the film doesn't make this the focus. It obviously wants to get to the meat of the story quickly so as to not bore the audience. Once the action starts it continues in a slow rhythm that fits the pace pretty well, it also builds up some intrigue about the monsters and why they exist, but the film doesn't answer all of your questions which keeps you hooked.
The film has some clear influences, one scene reminded me of Aliens when Vincent was crawling through the ducts to repair something else while the other characters fend off the monsters.
The film isn't smart, but it doesn't have to be, all it aims to do is entertain - and it does that quite well. I recommend giving it a watch if you're looking for a thriller that raises some intrigue but isn't trying to focus your attention on it. It also has some pretty decent acting, direction and effects that keep you immersed.
The Grand Tour (2016)
Pretty disappointing
The Grand Tour is anything but "grand". After being picked up by Amazon, the former presenters of Top Gear promised this a long time ago and really I wasn't that hopeful to see it. The three presenters just got worse and worse the longer Top Gear was on for and watching a show where they had very little restriction I thought would be hell. However, they are a lot better now than they were when they presented Top Gear, but that hardly saves this waste of potential.
The Grand tour could have been two things: a complete copy of Top Gear but with a larger budget and less restrictions, or it could have been an ALTERNATIVE to Top Gear that had a drastically different format that fit with what the presenters did best which was comedy. Unfortunately TGT is the former and it is basically them saying "We're exactly the same as Top Gear, but better cos we have the old presenters!" It could have been so much more, I was hoping they would go in a completely different direction and make it a comedy motoring show and not a motoring show with comedy elements.
In short, it's pretty boring and a waste of good potential. I don't hold out much hope that it will get any better and some of the more recent episodes have the same trend.
Aliens in the Attic (2009)
Pretty bad, but there is some fun in there
It's the kind of cheap CG kids film that's been done a thousand times before and this one is no different. The film is pretty bad when looking at it from most angles, but I admit it did get me a few times. The part where the kids control that guy was pretty funny for a few minutes.
To be honest, this is one of those films where the developers said "Comedy first, everything else later." and this really shows when looking at the story line, CG, acting (especially for the adult characters) and the writing. But the actual comedy can be entertaining, they do try to keep the jokes fresh, even though by the end it gets very stale, the writers put the most effort into the jokes - everything else is just wrong somehow.
When it's just humour, this is entertaining stuff, but when the plot is involved it just becomes a boring, cringy mess.