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Reviews
The Cell 2 (2009)
If pigs could fly, they would be Corporate.
What a trodden under, mediocre piece of cow manure, which murdered the cash cow from which this installment of the first, which should've stayed as the only one, The Cell, with Lopez, came from. And lo, they tried milking that cow and nothing but dust came out. They should have done the right thing and let it die a great film.
But no, a prep-pie brown nose money-hungry Jew in a suit and a tie considered, in his infinite corporate wisdom, that this half baked parasitic dung filled 'mainstream' plot less story 5 year old's use in summer camp, would do the first version its due honor. C list actors, obviously low-pay writers and production quality that could only be fair as to be said that they pursued some "grant" to fund the crayola quality production level we saw here. There, the world is safe again. Had my blood not been quelled, this entire website might have imploded into a burst of critique that would have eradicated all mediocre films contained herein, further streaming a flood of Cyber terminators set to prevent any further sins like this horrible movie, if it can be called that, and not a set of power point slides put into a sequence that fooled how many viewers that have seen this, into thinking it was a movie. Now that ladies and gentlemen, is rage, pure, fiery wrath of biblical proportions towards mediocrity, theft, dumbification of the nations and sheer blatant insult to those of us who wish they had not insulted their common sense and decent intelligence they have worked so hard in life not to be poisoned by the acid that is corporate culling of intelligence, imagination and critical thinking.
Profe por accidente (2013)
Genocide of the Dominican Film Industry
Dominican cinema is being derailed into invalidation from the serious film community of the world, by actors without desire for the quality of values and growth as individuals for other Dominicans, though to their defense one has to say it's because that is the only culture they know, which itself it's nothing more than the brief history of ignorance we have somehow managed to place ourselves. Perhaps it's history of religious prudishness/control y and political tyranny this country has suffered. And now that we barely taste of that minimal freedom it has acquired and started to develop, it is when we have seen but a glimpse of that individuality factor any society must have in order to have that needed freedom for self expression. But our self expression is limited to the stupidities caused as a result of the leaders in control of the uneducated. And that vicious circle that limits us is the same all these actors, directors, writers and producers come from. A circle of their own ignorance which millions of inhabitants share. That is the reason for this film.
Non of these actors can credibly perform a dramatic role, Shakespearean, or accomplishing any merits whatsoever in the international community, because the only thing we manage to pass by as, are a group of uncultured cavemen, with tribal mentality still in 2016, when countries like Guatemala, which are worse than us economically speaking, manage to make it into the Cannes Festival, for example, and we get nowhere near it. To create culture through our film, when that culture is nothing more than an exaltation of ignorant -tribal behavior, is not culture in itself, it is a witness of our backwardness. It is so sad. The darker skinned, facially denouncing their roots in the non-white genealogy of the countries "diverse" race demographic, have no chance of merit as those of the "more accepted", IE: White-European looking actors. What shame, and what waste of talent, the ones that are truly talented, yet hidden from the silver screen due to their genealogy, racial appearance, or social status. And the things they do to misrepresent us are short of criminal activity.
It is not an accomplishment to popularize our culture when it is depicted as backwards monkey play, it is just harmful to everyone And you know this is how delicate of a situation we are in, where even the slightest counts. 40% of takes where very mediocre angles or unprofessional, editing seems to have been rushed, the dialog is unconvincing and totally apart from the way Dominicans express themselves, characters are played by "Actors" that would never be typically from the social class they aim to make us believe, these and more are totally deterrent to our progress. Dominican film is being transformed into nothing more that a platform to popularize, canonize and deify these hacks which do such a poor job in imitating white American culture and desperately attempt to win people over with such sad lack of accurate representation of Dominican people.
"Robertico", the main actor, shows no difference in all the roles he has ever played, using the same mannerisms and expressions in all the movies he's ever been. The script, while not that badly written, uses the same actors they always use in the industry in general, for all genres. There's always a "limited" amount of actors, which these seem to keep appearing in all films, with the same underlying presence in other films. When will we see the next Dominican "godfather", or castaway, or pretty woman? Never. And you want to know why? Because is a zoo out there. The child mentality in the country in general is so... scary.
This movie was very funny, if you force yourself to believe it's not total horse manure. Made me laugh plenty, after totally and completely shutting off any analytical thought, common sense and desire to live in a world free of cancer. They definitely try, and try hard, to be serious, yet fail miserably and can't get past the punchline, bud sadder even, is the efforts they put to appear respectable and successfully exert on the rest of the population.
The actors that set off to their careers coming from humble beginnings, that start to get a speck of wealth and fame through the only available and effective way which is a sort of slap stick backwards comedy filled with misogynistic innuendos, caveman behavior and praise of ignorant behavior, which Dominican humor offers, end up in these movies considered of higher caliber in Dominican culture, yet the only thing that matches their subtlety to convey the character, are their aggressive and excessive use of mannerisms. Where were those serious shots, close ups and timing, which gives any character a bit of depth, even in comedy? I cry a river of tears as I write this review, in much pain. The hire mostly takes place for upper class citizens which are actors, like a high school story where daddy is president of the swim team and through his influence gets "Johnny" into the class play. Not by talent, or originality, or quality portrayal of the character, no. Those roles are mostly filled by upper class members of the society, which again, own the acting industry and won't allow any poor "chum" to get in.
In both cases, they speak more with their hands than with their ability to act. Now that's subtlety at its finest!
This an insult to the intelligence of the viewer, which is very limited as it is. But like in all zoo's, the animals have little desire or ability to break free. Please Dominican people, culture yourselves! Realize the American agenda there exists, willingly or unwillingly, to limit your admiration to typically white-culture, and the image of superiority. Teach about freedom, and self thought. Teach them about how to become more in control of the life they have practically handed to the higher classes. Pass the bleach, please.