Reviews

Yes, it's Invasion of the Body Snatchers again. A little nonsense added to make it not a direct copy. But there it is, "Don't fall asleep!" And, of course, we can walk amongst them if we hide our emotions. Wow, what a creative plot device!

And, of course, this is a Nicole Kidman film which means she will be on the screen 95% of the time. I think it must be in her contract.

So if you just want something to blabber on whilst you get some work done, not pay much attention, OK. But don't try and sit down and watch this turkey.

Yet another in the endless stream of zombie movies that Hollywood is churning out.

The zombies want to kill the healthly people. The people want to kill the zombies. A zombie bite makes you into a zombie. That's the whole plot.

Then just people running from zombies, killing zombies. Zombies biting and killing people. On and on and on.

That's about it. If this gore grabs you, watch it. You looking for a real movie with a plot? Pass on it.

Bad guys are going to crash all the financial markets in the USA. They tell us they will do it in two days. They tell us in advance… so that our hero can assemble his team (like in Ocean's 13, …)? Anyway, lots of other hardcore CS action. He needs the "back door codes" for all the market servers. He gets them – typed on a sheet of paper. Yeah, that's how I would pass on codes. But don't worry, when they use them the first security key to a market server is "RG182." And when the servers reboot, they all proclaim to be MS-DOS 6. Yes, fresh DOS 6.0, so much better than MS-DOS 6.21 for heavy Internet traffic.

Anyway, chop up 30 minutes of top CS action like this, stick it into a one-hour soap opera chick-flick. They are separated and fight over their daughter, who is dying of cancer of course. Then we have the betrayed employee who can help save the world – oh, and is banging the dying daughter. Finish up in 2016/17 style – the unbelievable plot twist of a betrayal, and a big-ass preachy ending.

SUX-net.

(I see reviewers rave about this wonderful film, blame bad reviews on trolls. Perhaps they didn't watch this turkey, just got a check? One is titled "very realistic" -- perhaps they have never been around computers?)

Directed by Ron Howard, starring Tom Hanks – looks exciting, gonna be great! What a turd.

Take the script basic idea for National Treasure. Toss Jason Borne into the blender. Now add every unrelated plot device in that you can think of. Have them crawling across high beams for no reason that is related to the plot, the search for the McGuffin.

Add a plot device of never-ending use – he's had a head injury and slowly remembers things. And have him go from seriously, noticeably injured to dapper in a new suit after a shower and a few hours – from unable to stand to doing a tightrope act. Then throw in a stupid plot twist with ten minutes of The Fifth Sense flashbacks explaining what really happened.