Change Your Image
kevinmcourtney
Reviews
Old Man (2022)
Not worth your time
- The guy who plays Joe is such a bad actor it really takes away any of the intensity of the film is trying to accomplish. And the old man frankly isn't much better. But the dialogue is very inorganically written anyway, so even if the acting was better it would still be a rough watch.
- This should have been a 15 minute short rather than 90+ minutes.
- This feels like it was written to be a play in a small local theater, where the intrigue is in the captive audience. It doesn't successfully translate to a movie format. And again, it should have been a short play at that.
- It tries to utilize a lot of silence to convey that the isolation of the location and highlight the characters' discomfort, but it just highlights how boring and empty the plot and dialogue is.
Crawlspace (2022)
Set your expectations at zero and you'll still be disappointed
I expected it to be bad, but it's even worse than you'd imagine possible. And not in a fun, awesomely bad way. Bad in a way that you can't even enjoy it. I don't know what the minimum amount of damage is required to file a class action lawsuit, but anyone who sat through this entire thing should be eligible to recoup damages.
With one or two exceptions the acting is terrible. The director was handed a script that isn't even worthy of giving the dignity of a shredder death and still managed to make the movie even worse than the horrible writing would dictate. I kept watching to the end because I was expecting something to happen, and to be fair there was an intriguing twist at one point, but then it quickly becomes obsolete and you're pulled back into the black hole of entertainment that is Crawlspace.
Santa Jaws (2018)
If you're watching a movie called "Santa Jaws," you'll get what you're looking for.
Very skilled actors performing a poorly written script, which is exactly what you're expecting (and admit it, hoping for) from movies like this.
Almost Heroes (1998)
Farley was fantastic
...but Matthew Perry was pretty terrible. The other cast members were pretty solid though.