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Reviews
Last Exit (2006)
What a waste of time - even for a made-for-TV movie
I can't believe anyone thought this movie was any good. It follows 2 women, only one of whom generated any empathy with the audience, and even that was a stretch and only temporary as the movie unfolds. Life's hard - we knew that, but that's no excuse for what happens.
The whole thing was senseless, completely lacking in any material that was thought-provoking and a total waste of time.
There was an attempt at character development, but it was very shallow, especially considering events which occur later on which are not in keeping with what little character development did occur.
The ending, in contrast to what some other reviewers claimed, was not a shock other than that it was put together so poorly.
I suppose if you generally like movies aired on Lifetime, this one might be for you, but as for me it only reinforces the reasons why I generally don't bother with them.
Shy Guy (1947)
Weird, but interesting - for about 10 minutes
too bad it's 14 minutes long.
It's Darren - err, I mean Dick York at age 19, 17 years before he played Darren.
He's a geek trying to figure out how to make it with the popular kids. The keys to popularity are being a good listener and being helpful.
Amazingly enough, he looks almost exactly like he did in Bewitched. Who'd a thunk he'd end up marrying Elizabeth Montgomery?
Did they really show this crap to kids in school back in the late '40s?
I'm sorry, but there's not much to say - it's only 14 minutes long. It is an interesting insight into how people thought in 1947, I guess.
BloodRayne (2005)
Why does everyone hate this film so much?
Really, it wasn't that bad, especially if you enjoy the vampire genre (no, I'm not a "goth") and can tolerate some imperfections in acting and dialogue. I can't believe some people actually criticized the fact that it wasn't realistic enough in places - duh - it's a friggin' vampire movie.
It did have enough redeeming qualities to make it worthwhile, including the scenes on horseback. The story was original enough and while Madsden may have seemed a bit "bored" and at least one other actor seemed only slightly better than Bruce Campbell, I enjoyed it.
I've seen so many other movies that were worse, I can't imagine those who claim this is the worst movie they've ever seen.
Perhaps it is because I watched this without any prejudices. The ONLY name I recognized in connection with this movie was Michael Madsden - and I didn't even notice he was in the cast until I saw him in the film. I haven't seen the other movies by this director that were mentioned by others.
I can only ask WHY? If the people who criticized it and compared it to his other films they also thought sucked, why did they bother with this one?
Club Dread (2004)
Another lame movie, but if you liked Super Troopers...
Then you'll probably like this one.
The ONLY thing I found slightly entertaining was the poke at Jimmy Buffet, and I am a dedicated parrot-head.
The songs Coconut Pete played throughout the movie were all too reminiscent of a good Buffet tune, but fell short, which I'm sure was part of the humor in it.
So when the girl wanted to hear Margaritaville and Paxton/Coconut Pete went off on her and said he wrote Pina-Colada-Burgh long before Buffet wrote Margaritaville was the only part which even raised a smile for me.
Then again, I've not been a fan of this style of inane humor since I was about 13, and I realize others are, so if you liked Super Troopers (I thought it sucked, despite being a big fan of early Cheech & Chong movies, so it's not an adverse reaction to stereotypical stoner humor) or Scary Movie (I thought it was okay), you'll probably get a kick out of this one.
Night Fangs (2005)
some good moments, but overall lame
I could get past the obvious low budget aspects of this film, but the story didn't hold my interest at all. I kept finding myself looking at the time wondering when it would be over.
I agree with those who said they should have delved more into the diaries of what's-her-face. There was way too much unexplained, and even for a vampire movie, there was too much suspension of belief required. One character turns into a vampire when there was no reason to understand why and another seemed not to when he should have.
Too many scenes were set up with no explanation and no discernible conclusion, leaving much of the film to be a sequence of disjointed vignettes.
I got the impression that this was the work of a film student who hired whoever he could dig up from other students attending whatever school he was studying at.
Loyalty & Respect (2006)
Can I get the last 80 minutes of my life back?
Watching this was definitely a mistake. It used lots of clichés from other gangster movies, but failed to portray any of them effectively.
The acting was sub-par and the video and audio was worse. I'm no expert, but if I'm not mistaken, some of was shot on video rather than film. Unless you're into Quanie Cash's music, don't bother.
I don't have anything against low-budget movies, but this one had no redeeming values at all. The story was boring and there was no character development which would allow any empathy for any of the characters in the film.
I've just been informed by IMDb that my "comment does not contain enough lines".
So let me comment on the police in the movie. They looked like they were extras in some of the cheesier porn movies I've seen in my life.
I don't know who Quanie Cash is, but I get the impression he is a loser wannabe from Atlanta, and drank a little too much malt liquor and smoked way too much dirt weed while making this film.
Is that enough?
Hostel (2005)
That was intense
I had to check spoilers since I couldn't resist reviewing this without giving some parts away, but I have not given everything away - perhaps just a little more than one might take from the previews. Read at your own risk.
I watched the preview for this movie and put off watching it until I was in the right mood. If Quentin Tarantino hadn't been involved in some way I probably would have given it a miss, but even though I still didn't think I was up for seeing graphic scenes of sadistic torture, I couldn't resist watching it.
The first half hour sets up the main characters, 2 Americans partying in Amsterdam with a guy from Iceland they just met. They're into normal stuff like getting stoned and getting laid. On the advice of a stranger, they head off to Slovakia where the girls are hot for foreigners.
As soon as they arrive, you get the sense that something isn't right (of course, I suppose the previews helped with that). The scenery is what you'd expect from an Eastern European country behind the former Iron Curtain, very industrial, very bleak, but then they find their oasis, a hostel with hot chicks, a spa, a disco....they're in heaven.
Then each morning, they wake up to find that one of them is missing and they can't get in touch with them, first the Icelander, then one of the Americans. We are shown some of what happens to the victims, and while it was hard to watch because of the torture/gore factor, most of it is actually left up to the imagination of the viewer.
I was reminded of the torture scene in Reservoir Dogs as one of the victims sat helplessly in a chair in anticipation of what was surely to come, but as Tarantino points out in the commentary for that film, they never actually show the graphic brutality of the cops ear getting cut off - different torture here, but again, they don't actually show that although the build-up and the aftermath make your imagination fill in all the blanks so you feel as though you had.
Do not be misled by these comparisons to Reservoir Dogs though - the 2 movies are nothing alike beyond what I've already mentioned. Hostel is definitely more graphic. I do have to agree with the poster who said this was more of a thriller than a horror flick. The horror is contained and once the lone survivor escapes, there is suspense as he tries to get away from the Slovakian mob which has obviously enlisted the police in their efforts.
I see the movie in 3 parts, the setup introducing the characters and how they get into the situation the movie is about, the terror, and the escape. The escape is what really saved this movie from being a torture/horror flick - it wasn't like so many horror films where the "escape" consists of the final 3-4 minutes.
Kid Blue (1973)
This movie made me smile
The first half of this seemed kind of slow to me and a couple of times I only watched about 10 minutes of it when it came on IFC, telling myself I'd rather watch it all the way through from the beginning.
I was glad I did. Bickner (Hopper) is a godless, but sincere former outlaw trying to live a straight life under tough conditions and a mean sheriff in a small town where the factory turned out to be his only hope for work.
Though I thought it a bit slow at first, about halfway through, I found I was into it and the ending actually made me smile.
My favorite line is easily Hopper's when he tells Warren Oates, "A man's gotta kill his own snakes.", which I found to have meaning on multiple levels.