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3/10
Of course people make bad choices in horror movies, but...
25 February 2022
You know the characters are doomed by their poor choices when one of the first things they do is put gas in a Tesla...nuff said. Well IMDb won't let me leave it at that so I guess I'll also add more, so what's a horror movie without any sex or nudity? I mean c'mon man, it's supposed to be a TCM movie. Then let's throw in the lame attempt of being "woke". OMG a tattered confederate flag hanging in a ghost town, who will ever invest in the town now? There are a few decent parts, but most of the movie you're just left saying "really?". So feel free to watch it if you want a politically correct horror movie, with no nudity and a main character with an awful 1980's perm.
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Hostile (I) (2017)
8/10
Look past the ugliness
27 June 2020
This was definitely not what I was expecting, it was actually much better, and deeper. I'm sure this movie, like most with flashbacks, will get panned by some reviewers because of it. However, after watching it through, the movie is actually more in the flashbacks than the "present" storyline. It has a really cool and moving symmetry at the beginning and end, using the gunshot. I actually let the movie begin to play over again at the end, which is where I really noticed it, and by rerunning is where you catch all the foreshadowing that you may not have caught. One of the first scenes, in the art gallery, with the "look past the ugliness" explanation of the Bacon artwork, is the basis of the story. I think you'll enjoy the movie as long as you're not looking for it to be the typical, gory, zombie-like post apocalyptic movie. Also understand that one flashback doesn't pick up exactly where the other left off (this threw me off at first and is why I enjoyed watching it a second time after understanding). The flashbacks are linear, but time passes (weeks to months) between them. This was a pleasant surprise, since I sit through quite a few bad movies when I look for free movies to stream.
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A.M.I. (2019)
4/10
Don't delete me!
6 October 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Not really pertinent to the movie, but one of the first signs that this movie would be a dumpster fire was when AMI was initially being set up. The name of the program, as it appeared on the phone, was AMEE, while the movie is titled AMI. Like I said, it doesn't really affect the story, but wtf. This movie was just too extreme and unrealistic. Also, you could see the ending coming from a mile away. The narrative did provide one though provoking aspect, however. With the way we currently perceive "immortality", coming by way of transferring our consciousness, and not necessarily the survival of our body; it did make me think. If you lose someone close to you, what would actually suffice as a "replacement" for missing them? If an A.I. Is able to converse with you, and even get personal details of your life by delving into your memories via social media, can it help one deal with a loss? If I don't see my mother often, and our typical interaction is by telephone, how significant of a difference would it be if I were speaking to her or an A.I.? Of course I'm this movie the A.I. has bad intentions, but if it were If it were capable of "fooling me" into forgetting that my mother were dead, would that be helpful or hurtful? Would it put me at ease, or blur the lines of reality and promote mental instability (such as in this film). Anyway, while I did find that thread to be interesting, the way the movie unfolded lacked substance. The female lead just goes about killing without any second thought, and without any repercussions. I'm not sure the exact time line of how much time transpired between killings, but the police just seemed oblivious to the fact that they were even occurring. It doesn't really keep you engaged wondering what's next because there's no suspense whatsoever, you know what's coming next. I guess it's worth putting on if you have nothing else to watch, and you can definitely do a second task while watching it, because you're not in danger of missing some subtlety that'll cause you to be confused.
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Pledge (2018)
8/10
Surprisingly very good
4 May 2019
Warning: Spoilers
I really wasn't expecting much here, and it turned out to be a lot better than I would've thought. Given the name, "Pledge", I was just thinking another serial killer or crazy pledge was going to slaughter everyone on campus. What I find makes a good horror is whether you think that you, or other could find yourself in a similar situation, and that's a definite possibility. I'll try to just generalize, without giving specific spoilers out. So if you are doing an extreme scare, haunted house, or a pledge like this, it's meant to "torture" you, and at what point do you say that this is no longer part of the game. Putting myself in these guys shoes, and wondering when I would know something was up, really kept me on the edge of my seat. The reviews saying it's dumb because people would fight back knowing they are going to die; sure, but at what point do you KNOW you're going to die. Even at a point where someone who's seemingly involved tells you to run or get out, you have to wonder if that's part of the test. Then towards the end when you find out why what's happening is happening, only adds to the irony of it. The movie itself (sound, filming) is good, and I liked the story and everything in between. It's a solid 7/8, and definitely worth a free stream.
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8/10
Well I noticed your tits Jess!
1 May 2019
This was a really good movie, somewhere around a 7.5. The 10's are a little high, and some have those cues of people involved in the movie. The guy who did the score for the movie left a 10, but he divulged his involvement, so I don't really have a problem with that. If you had fun, and are proud of your work, by all means leave a review, but don't hide behind the facade of a random viewer. But I digress. Ok so, I guess nothing really does happen, but not in a boring way, it's well written with witty and funny dialogue. It starts off as just showing says in the life of a guy who is basically socially awkward, and not very well adjusted. The thing is, the poor guy seems pretty normal, and his friends and wife are just dic&s. Not only could you do worse as far as putting on a movie while checking emails, etc., but the movie actually makes you stop doing anything else, and pay attention to the movie. I was enjoying the hilarity of the character interaction, and was fine with that being the movie, but then a twist is added. Odd little things you see early in the movie, and are like wtf, begin to get explained as a time travel or alternate universe aspect is added. What's odd is I don't see this mentioned in any of the reviews. Surreal events is about the only mention of the sci-fi aspect. Heck, one review does nothing except talk about "how Houston" the movie is. Wtf does that even mean? Yeah, it's filmed in Houston, but the filming is almost solely fixed on the characters and faces, there aren't any scenes with landmarks or anything like that, besides I thought Austin was supposed to be "the weird city", but once again I digress.
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7/10
Entertaining and even worth a second look
22 April 2019
This was a good, funny, and entertaining movie. I even went back and watched some of it over again to catch a few of the details. 8,9,10 stars though?! That's a bit much. For a fake documentary that doesn't have much acting or cinematography involved, I think a 7 is about as perfect a score as you can get. Overall, it's worth the watch and I'd recommend giving it a chance.
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Close Calls (2017)
5/10
Doesn't deserve the 9 & 10's it has
26 March 2019
The movie is fairly entertaining, although I doubt I could watch it if the hot girl wasn't in her underwear for the entire movie. Maybe you need to be trippin or smokin salvia for it to make sense. It had potential to be better, but was just way too confusing as to what was fantasy and what was reality. If you watch it just don't expect it to make sense, but know that your reward for making it (or fast forwarding) to the end, is the bra finally gets lost in the last few minutes.
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Back Roads (2018)
9/10
Excellent movie
25 March 2019
I wasn't quite sure what I was getting into when I started this movie, but it didn't disappoint. Between rentals and streaming, I watch a movie every night, so with such a prolific quantity many are either sub-par or very similar to each other. This was a nice surprise. The synopsis sounded like a dark thriller and I figured it would be decent, but it was excellent. It was definitely dark, and extremely messed up. There were a couple of twists, that ended up being even more dark and twisted than I thought they'd be. I won't go into detail about the plot other than to say dark and twisted. I know I've used those adjectives more than once, but that pretty much sums it up.
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2/10
What? Confusing doesn't = brilliant
3 February 2019
Warning: Spoilers
I didn't have much issue with the acting or pace, though I guess it could've been better. The confusing timeline overshadowed both of these as the weak point of the movie. While the flashbacks do an adequate job of filling in Savanah's past, the ending, and murder the police are investigating just doesn't come together. I rewatched bits of the end, hoping it would make sense, but no dice. If she is doing the killing then who chops her up? (At least I'm pretty sure those are her body parts being found) But if that's the case what is with the ending and her being alive to don the mask? It makes it look like there are two separate times that she's covered in blood inside the cabin, and I don't get why the cop says everything is clear at the cabin. It looks like a time jump is involved, but he clearly runs across dead bodies. Like I said, confusing doesn't necessarily = brilliant, and that's definitely the case here. I honestly have no idea what was the actual ending of this movie.
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Polar (I) (2019)
8/10
Will be waiting for Polar Vol. 2
27 January 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Was it realistic...no, most action movies aren't. Was it entertaining...absolutely! For all the 1&2 star reviews all I can ask is "what did you think you were about to watch?". Clearly if you're posting reviews I would assume you read them as well, and look at cast line ups. When I sat down to decide which, usually mediocre at best, Netflix or Amazon movie I would watch, this popped up as new. I read the Netflix synopsis and thought it would be ok, but wasn't sure if I was in the mood for an action flick that was too dramatic. Then I looked on IMDb and saw how the cast was laid out, and it was obviously going not going to be that type of movie when I saw the assassins would be a group of hot females. It had very high violence and sexual ratings so I figured "sure, I can do this.". The movie immediately gave me a Kill Bill type vibe, and that is pretty much the type of movie it is. For those who didn't pick up on this before the movie from the ratings or within the first few minutes, your lack of perception is on you. The quality and acting alone is worth a 5, but I found it nicely paced and entertaining, with an unexpected twist (I thought for sure Camille would be his daughter) so I give it a solid 7/8. There's nothing I can point out as being "wrong" with the movie. It is as advertised; an over the top action movie with violence and sex, and it makes for a great watch. If this isn't the type of movie you want to watch, then don't watch it. Don't watch it and rate it 1 star while complaining of the action and violence, you've been forewarned.
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Anna (III) (2017)
4/10
"Horror" there's a lot of confused people in my life then
2 December 2018
You'll get the air quotes if you watch the movie lol. Ok so maybe this should be a horror/comedy. From the dumb & dumber thieves to the goofy dialogue, it was the humor that made this watchable. The haunted doll story has been played out many times and it's not like this movie has anything to add from the horror aspect. If the movie had taken itself seriously I would've gone to sleep halfway through. However, the movie has some pretty funny dialogue between the two main characters. It's hard to recommend as a horror movie but I did find it enjoyable.
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Wraith (I) (2017)
2/10
Pro-life Christian propaganda.
2 December 2018
Bad acting and boring story. No action or scared to speak of. It was mainly the female lead doing research to find out what anyone half paying attention realizes halfway through the movie.
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Hell Mountain (2017)
7/10
Top 90 percentile on Prime
27 August 2018
If you're considering this movie, chances are you're like I was and scrolling through Amazon Video looking for something that isn't awful. When I decided to watch it, there was only one review (albeit positive), so I was a little skeptical. To my delight, this was one of the better horror movies I found on any of the streaming services in a while. One thing I found to be a breath of fresh air was the pacing of the movie, at no point was I bored. In most movies where there is a description something like "group goes to investigate house/hospital/asylum/etc", said group goes to the house, and that's where you spend the next 90 minutes. This was different. Roaming and exploring the "haunted" house, was only a small part of the movie, it then kept moving along with the story. There was a point where I thought it was going to take a turn to being ridiculous or corny, but it smooths out, and yes there are some factual inconsistencies you need to overlook, but it's a movie. The biggest problem I have with most indie movies is low quality audio or video, sometimes that makes them unwatchable for me. Fortunately, neither of these are issues, and neither is awful acting. So if you're like me, and scrolling through your recommended movies trying to decide which will suck the least, go ahead and give Hell Mountain a shot, it's definitely one of the better options on the streaming platforms.
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3/10
Don't do it
10 July 2018
I found two similar "isolation" type movies and decided to watch both before reviewing. I watched this first, and "Edge of Isolation" the following night, because "Edge" had the lower rating. This is the second time I've done comparisons on two similar movies, and both times the second, lower rates movie was better. When I decide to recommend a movie it isn't "would I watch it again" (that's almost always a no), it's more "after seeing it, would I go back and watch it in the first place?". While I would definitely watch "Edge", I would save the 90 minutes I wasted watching "First House". It had my attention in the beginning, it had potential. I watched in interest at first, seeing how it would develop, but then it took a turn for the worse. Where the movie had a chance to get interesting, it just went bat $hit crazy, like the writer dropped some acid at the beginning of the movie and then it hit him an hour in. I'll save you the trouble and just tell you to go watch "Edge of Isolation" instead.
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7/10
Worth the watch
10 July 2018
As with my last two reviews I had run across two similar sounding movies, so decided to watch both before reviewing. In this case it was two "isolation" type movies, the other being "First House on the Hill". This movie had some less than glowing reviews so I watched the other first, but "Edge" is worth the watch, and "First House" is awful. One of the reviews for "Edge" takes issue with the parts the characters play; upset that, (as they describe him) the black male lead doesn't take control, while allowing the white female to play the dominant role...racist much? Yes, the roles were reversed a bit, but score one for diversity. If the person complaining had paid attention, the female lived the rough street life growing up, and the guy who wasn't black enough for them was actually adopted and raised by a white family, and purposely kept from the streets..his name is Lance O'Brien for Christ sake, not Tupac Shakur. So the lead male was an open minded character and not your typical Alpha male, and the female lead was the harder, less trusting character (and she was indeed a bit annoying). The story was pretty good, and wasn't all predictable. The situation definitely could've been done a few different ways, and it did keep you questioning which direction it would go. I prefer not to get too into the movie, with spoilers, but this one was definitely worth the time.
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6/10
Worth the watch
10 July 2018
I found this and "Always Watching" while browsing, and both seemed like similar found footage movies, and based on reviews watch "Always Watching" first- in short - this was much better. Usually if I fall asleep during a movie, it doesn't get revisited, and I was struggling to stay awake when I put this on, but it seemed interesting so I actually put it back on the next day. The movie was technically sound (hate when the sound and video are crappy), and kept me guessing and on edge. There were a number of instances where the movie could've gone in more than one direction, and it legitimately had me guessing as to who was in on what. For me, the true answer to how good a movie is (especially Netflix or Prime freebies) is "would I watch it knowing what I know after watching it?", and yes, I would definitely thought this was worth the time and would recommend it. Don't waste your time with "Always Watching". That's one I would not watch after knowing what I know now.
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4/10
Nothing new here
10 July 2018
So I ran across two movies that seemed pretty similar; this and The Levenger Tapes. They're both found footage and I decided to go with this one first, after reading some reviews and seeing this also had a YouTube series, I figured it would be the better of the two. After watching them both, I highly recommend the Levenger Tapes over this. I found this pretty boring and started falling asleep at the end. This just didn't add anything new to the found footage genre. The whole "evil entity only visible through a camera" has already been done, so nothing exciting here. There's not really anything in particular that makes the movie awful, but nothing makes it entertaining either. Just overall boring with a played out premise.
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1/10
Thinning the herd
15 June 2018
Warning: Spoilers
The best thing about it was the creepy masks. It looks enticing on the cover, but just fails to deliver. If you make the decisions this family made, you probably deserve to die. How do you get taken out by three teenagers with hardly any weapons of their own? Why is it no one in these home invasion movies ever had a gun? Oh wait, then you find one but have no idea how to use it. Let's see, I have an attacker at gun point and then I'm going to take my eyes off of him while giving him a countdown to leave- genius! Then get another attacker held at gunpoint and let them go- again, you deserve to die. I also can't stand it when people lock themselves in a bathroom and just wait to be killed. Maybe use glass from a mirror, impale them with a shower curtain rod, heck use the door to your advantage- you do realize when someone is reaching through that you have a leverage advantage right? Oh especially when you have a 2 on 1 advantage. Between 2 men, neither have so much as even a pocket knife? Or here we go, family of four decides it's a good idea to split up and send the 2 women off on their own. I know, this isn't even a review. It's a rant in the blatant stupidity and horrible choices made by the "victims". Beyond boring!
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4/10
Not much to say
3 June 2018
Really not much to say here. It is what it is, I mean there are a 100 asylum movies and another 1000 movies about paranormal investigation teams, this movie has both. I do think it's in the better half of these movies (for whatever that's worth). Mainly above average because it was pretty well made, good effects and not horrible acting. Personally, I actually liked the team and individuals (as cliche as they are). So yes, it's a team of paranormal investigators going in to document a haunting, but I don't think it's a waste of time. Oh yeah, there's also a missing children angle thrown in, which is a little different. Btw that's where the worst acting occurs. The female cop must be the producers sister or something because she is awful.
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Suite 313 (2017)
3/10
Should've been 30 minutes
1 June 2018
Okay, if you're planning on sitting down and having this be you're evening movie, you will be furious. From the beginning, when he gets the instructions to respond to the call I thought it had the feeling of a first person horror video game, and that's exactly what it ended up being. The instructions, choices, cheesy dialogue...but as someone who likes those games I was entertained a little. It did have the suspense of navigating through a puzzle to survive, but it definitely ran too long. I was really enjoying it at first, but halfway through, I was thinking that was enough. So it's entertaining (albeit limited), but don't make it your evening feature, just a little something extra.
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The Lost Tree (2016)
1/10
The Lost $2
23 May 2018
Warning: Spoilers
I got suckered into this by some reviews that people were clearly paid to write. That and I figured if it was bad at least I could watch cute little Lacey Chabert for 90 minutes. Sucker! Chabert had maybe 5 minutes of screen time. As a matter of fact, only a handful of scenes featured anyone more than the main character, and most of those were awful flashbacks. This movie seemed like something that would play in network television on a Sunday afternoon in the 80's. Awful picture quality, several times I started to curse at my WiFi connection for 240p resolution and then I remembered I was watching a disc. Seriously, there were times you couldn't even make out facial features. Then there was the overdone musical score. Do you know what puts me to sleep during a movie? Long stretches of music with no dialogue. Guess what 90% of this movie was...that's right, I was drifting in and out of consciousness from the 10 minute mark. It didn't matter though because whenever I was awake the main character was just wandering around a barren landscape. The acting when there was dialogue was awful, as if they were reading straight from the script. As bad as the opening scene was I was really hoping it would get better because it had good reviews. When the guys wife gets hit by the car it was sooooo poorly done; no sound effects like a screeching car, collision, or screaming. All of a sudden he walks up and you see his wife in the street wtf. Absolutely dreadful! The last 30 minutes (which is how long the movie should've been) the action finally picks up but by that point the movie is hopeless, and even the "climax" was pretty senseless. It's as if someone had this movie sitting in their closet for 30! years and decided to reshoot some scenes to include texting and iPhones to modernize it. Don't waste your money renting this and furthermore, when it makes it onto a free service, still do not waste your time unless you need something for insomnia.
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Anna (VII) (2013)
8/10
Worth the watch
21 May 2018
Warning: Spoilers
From the first meeting with Anna I figured it would be a good watch. It was a good psychological mind screw and kept me interested. Yes, you could see the twists coming, but most "twists" are somewhat predictable. Some reviewers are unhappy with the ending, but personally I liked it, once she felt she made a clean break she showed that she wasn't wasn't a sociapath and completely malicious. Others are upset there's no closure to whether or not she committed any other crimes or how much mischief she was truly responsible for. I think that adds to the mystery and also shows that you can't know some things 100%, only Anna knows the truth. Besides, solving these questions wasn't the point of the movie. I usually prefer sitting down to a horror movie and it takes a little commitment to sit and watch a thriller. Well the horror pickings have gotten slim and I'm definitely glad that I sat for this one.
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Black Lightning (2018–2021)
5/10
Definitely not a 9
13 May 2018
Warning: Spoilers
The lowers ratings on here are closer to the truth than the high ones. It seems many want to rate this show a 9 simply to try to defend it. I'm writing this as I watch episode 12, so that tells you (A) that I'm trying to stick with it and (B) it isn't compelling enough to keep me off my phone. I've liked most of the CW/DC shows and typically just enjoy the ride. Black Lightning is also a fun show, but it is a little more lame than the others. When I first saw his suit I was like cmon please tell me this isn't what he's gonna wear. Seriously, Batman doesn't stare ominous over Gotham with neon bat on his chest. Then we have the show's song "I saw a superhero, he was black. He said this is for the street, Black Lightning's back" lmao...seriously. I'm also not really a fan of his daughters BOTH suddenly getting powers just as JP decides to return as BL. There's also no doubt that this show tries to focus more on social commentary much more than any of the other superhero shows. The people giving it 9's and denying this are killing their credibility. Yes, it does portray the hold gangs have on the community, but there's reference after reference of the black community being victimized by white people. While I do just try to let most of it slide and enjoy the show, it does get a bit offensive. There's an episode in the beginning where the kids are protesting confederate monuments, there's a reference to Flint, MI being a government test on the commmunity, the entire story revolves around the drug "Green Light" being unleashed in the community by "the man" to control the people. Of course when JP's daughter gets arrested he has to remind her she's black and all it takes is one cop to see her race and not her humanity, there's an incident where BL condemns the police because they were about to shoot a subject who was high on Green Light and attacking them (despite the fact that the subject nearly kicks BL's a$$). I really wasn't planning on getting into this aspect too much, but as I'm writing JP is getting arrested and being sure to yell that "he's not resisting, he's complying". Even the school mantra "Live your live by any means necessary" is an homage to Malcolm X. So as much as I'm trying to ignore these things, the social commentary is very much in your face, and those denying it is there are as closed minded as the people they're dissing who are giving it 1's. So my 5 is based on the merit of the show, overlooking any political statements. I can easily see how this would turn some people off and they would give it a 1 because it makes the show less enjoyable. I can't defend those giving it a 9 just because of the politics though because the political statement doesn't make up for the overacting, lame writing. I am still watching it and just trying to enjoy it as a fun show, but the politics takes away from light hearted fun and yes, the show is pretty weak compared to the other DC shows. I do like the jazz and blues music that's strewn throughout the show though...that suit though lol.
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1/10
Pretty bad
7 May 2018
Bad and boring. From the description I was hoping the saving grace would be gratuitous sex and nudity, but even that was few and far between. Sorry the movie doesn't deserve an in depth review.
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2/10
You can turn it off after the sex scene or better yet fast fwd to it
7 May 2018
I stuck around just long enough for, as one reviewer put it "the totally gratuitous sleazy sex scene", or as I call it- the best part of the movie. Thanks for the heads up fellow reviewer or I probably wouldn't have made it that far.
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