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Reviews
Qing dian da sheng (2005)
HK's Scary Movie
It borrowed scenes from LOTR, Matrix, Star Wars, etc. The humor is so dry, contrived, and corny, that you can't help but laugh occasionally at its inanity and the fact that you are watching it. Exactly what you'd expect from an HK comedy. The average person would enter with an IQ of 100 and leave with less than 80. Stephen Chow is an obvious omission from this movie. The humor would have worked better with Stephen. The Mandarin version of this movie is not as good as the Cantonese original. The graphics are poor compared to its Hollywood counterparts. There is overdependence on low quality CG. My biggest complaint is its ending. The origin of the white horse is so clearly described in the "Journey to the West" (JW), that this alternate explanation does not work well with story line. Despite its many flaws this movie has far more entertainment value than the other movie Nicholas Tse starred in--The Promise.
Wu ji (2005)
I can't believe Kaige Chen spent 3 years on this garbage
Kaige's thought process: Ang Lee directed "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" followed by Yimou Zhang's "Hero" and "House of Flying Daggers," so I must make a martial arts film. Ang Lee's "Brokeback Mountain" contained gay themes, and I had made a successful film called "Farewell My Concubine," so I will add that element here. Rob Marshall mix casted several Chinese actors as Japanese Geishas, and since I can't get Zhang Ziyi to play the Concubine or Gong Li, the Goddess, I will just mix cast a Korean and Japanese actor as Chinese speaking characters and have my wife play God. Finally, if I add a bunch of themes together (since none of them relate, I'll just call it a fantasy) and cook them in a rice cooker with low quality CG, everyone will bite.
The graphics pale in comparison to the "Fellowship of the Ring" (2001). Don't tell me there are more graphics/production talent in New Zealand four, five years ago than the entire China. This is just a lazy effort. Kaige spend 30 million US on this junk, he might as well spend a few more for Hollywood digital effect. The yaks look like rats and the bird's view of the Imperial Palace looks like something out of a PC game 10, 15 years ago.
The plot is the worst I've ever seen for a such hyped movie. Flaws are everywhere. When the Slave killed the King, the logic should be because the Concubine was the only one not holding a weapon. Yet the Slave said he killed the King to protect the Concubine. How did he know that was the King when he had to ask for directions in the preceding scene? The General only told the Slave that the King holds no weapon and nothing more.
Not only is this movie illogical, it is also insulting to the mind. At least Spiderman, Superman, and the Fantastic Four tried to explain their superpowers with pseudoscience. The People of the Snow in "the Promise" are ridiculous. They can run faster than the wind, yet, none of them can escape capture. They are either dead or became slaves.
Kaige should be ashamed of the dialogues. Five thousand years of Chinese history, and this is what the "most prominent" Chinese director/script writer came up with?!! Real speed is when the leaves turn yellow or when a tooth emerges?!! That's not speed, that's called not paying attention to trivial matters. If you take that kind of speed, the only direction you will go in time is forward, you would have wasted an entire life time rather than starting over. If you want to go back in time, you have to make the Earth rotate in the reverse direction like Superman! One out of ten for all the boasting Kaige said. Do I get my money back? He guaranteed that everyone would find happiness in his film.