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danielbozchelou
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The Untouchables (1987)
The finest Law Enforcement documentary since slumdog millionaire
The Untouchables was an invigorating experience that retells the story of the famed Elliot Ness, but with a few historical embellishments. That being said, the creative license taken by the director, overall resulted in an exciting, immersive experience, that you will never tire of. Giuseppe chews iron nails and punched moving cars. Untouchables? More like the Unwopables. Dirty Ness and the bois proved without a doubt that all you need is a 'stinking Irish Pig' to school Al Canoli and shove a stroller with a baby down a flight of stairs. Just note that, in the end, Robert DeNiro gets sent to con-college for keeping Mexican fire crackers where the sun don't shine.
BlacKkKlansman (2018)
The Klansman was indeed black
This movie, believe it or not, was about a klansman. Said klansman, was black. David Duke can tell if you're white by the way you pronounce Baron Trumps middle name. This movie has inspired me to become the chief of police of Miami. My goal should be complete by next week.
Hot Bot (2016)
Art lives and breathes
In the course of film history, there have been only a handful of grand masterpieces. These unique gems of unequalled beauty touch our hearts and souls. They teach us to think, to feel, and to love as we had not before. They act as a spiritual guide to the human condition. I can assure you that Hot Bot is one such masterpiece.
This tribute to modern romance and advanced robotics will bring you endless excitement and whimsy in an attempt to answer one of life's greatest questions: is the bot hot? This critic can strongly say maybe.
Martha please bring back the kids
Mortdecai (2015)
Earn that paycheck Johnny
Mortdecai is a movie that was made to go straight to airplane entertainment systems and motel lobbies. This nearly 2 hour march of boring and overplayed British cliches reminds you that the lead actor and his character share one vital trait: Monstrous debt in need of urgent repayment. The nauseatingly lifeless performance of Johnny Depp was only equaled in despair by a dizzying and idiotic plot, impossible for the adult mind to follow. A clear lack of intelligence in the writer's room led to what are no doubt some of the laziest, most crass and unamusing jokes ever to escape a moron's lips on the big screen. In conclusion, this uninspired, unambitious, agonizing trash heap of a film is hardly suitable for even the most heinous of criminals, or labotomy patients.