Change Your Image
timothylenox
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Lists
An error has ocurred. Please try againReviews
Children of Camp Blood (2020)
A Thumbnail Review of CHILDREN OF CAMP BLOOD
Mark REVOLT ON THE EMPIRE OF THE APES Polonia wrote/directed this DOG about a group of young people in therapy after enduring decades of killer clown attacks in the Camp Blood vicinity. I'm often critical of slasher movies (especially the FRIDAY THE 13TH franchise) but when you subject yourself to something as miserable as CHILDREN OF CAMP BLOOD you come away with a sense of just how much more production value and talent you get with studio backing. The rock bottom special effects and gore are substandard or are substandard AND recycled from previous installments and the cast of unappealing unknowns is no help whatsoever. This is the 10th dismal entry in the unpopular backyard brand (11th if you count 2005's unauthorized sequel WITHIN THE WOODS). As depressing as it is boring and frequently at the same time.
The Mystery of the Hooded Horsemen (1937)
A Thumbnail Review of THE MYSTERY OF THE HOODED HORSEMEN
Singing cowboys were big back in the day before they invented color and Tex RAINBOW OVER THE RANGE Ritter was of the same magnitude a performer as Roy Rogers even if some of the material he had to work with was occasionally cringe-worthy. The songs Tex has to sing this time aren't exactly top of the pops and The Ranch Ramblers howling like coyotes on stage at the saloon fare no better. This could have used a little more love and attention from the lowly Grand National Films and producer Lindsley ROLLIN' PLAINS Parsons. Tex finds himself coming to the rescue of a young lady (Iris THE SON OF DAVEY CROCKETT Parsons) who's being hounded by a gang of hooded bandits. Along with his loyal steed White Flash, our hero infiltrates the marauders to the consternation of the sheriff (Earl THE PURPLE VIGILANTES Dwire) who can't tell the good guys from the bad. From writer Edmond TEX RIDES WITH THE BOY SCOUTS Kelso and director Ray FLASH GORDON CONQUERS THE UNIVERSE Taylor. B&W.
Rollin' Plains (1938)
A Thumbnail Review of ROLLIN' PLAINS
Poverty row studio Grand National Films opened shop in 1936 and survived just long enough to crank out this horse opera before closing it's doors the following year. Country singer and B-movie western superstar Tex TENTING TONIGHT ON THE OLD CAMP GROUNDS Ritter and his faithful horse sidekick White Flash investigate land disputes between sheep herders and cattle ranchers. A wealthy land owner named Barrow (Karl SING, COWBOW, SING! Hackett) has been instigating the disruptions while simultaneously setting up gang leader trigger (Charles DEADWOOD DICK King) to take the fall. If all that rootin' and tootin' wasn't enough there's also the tangy, twangy musical stylings of The Beverly Hillbillies to sweeten the B&W pot! What you'd expect from screen write Lindsley TROUBLE IN TEXAS Parsons and director Albert DELINQUENT DAUGHTERS Herman. Certainly not for all tastes but genre addicts may have some fun with it.
Bluebeard (1944)
A Thumbnail Review of BLUEBEARD
John THE SENTINEL Carradine is wonderfully depraved as an artist named Morrell who murders his models in fits of delusional rage after a bad experience with a prostitute. Jean MINESWEEPER Parker catches the serial killer's attention when she offers to design costumes for his puppets. Gay Nils NIGHT MONSTER Asther plays the noire-ish detective alerted to the artist's crimes when the face on Morrell's painting is recognized as belonging to BLUEBEARD's latest victim. Poverty row studio The Producers Releasing Corporation filmed this adaption of the 1697 French story by Charles Perrault. Pierre THE MONSTER MAKER Gendron & Arnold THE BRIGHTON STRANGLER Lipp prepared the script for director Edgar THE AMAZING TRANSPARENT MAN Ulmer. A unexpected feather in the cap of all involved especially Carradine who considered his performance as BLUEBEARD among his best. B&A.
The Black Raven (1943)
A Thumbnail Review of THE BLACK RAVEN
Poverty row studio The Producers Releasing Corporation filmed this formulaic remake of the 1936 murder mystery THE ROGUE'S TAVERN. George THE HOUSE OF FRANKENSTEIN Zucco plays the sinister proprietor of a spooky hotel which plays host to an unexpected mix of characters one dark and stormy night. Frequent Monogram Pictures starlet Wanda JUNGLE GODDESS McKay and Robert Livingston play an eloped couple hiding from the storm and the lady's outraged father. Livingston may be best remembered for having played Stony Brooke in 29 of the 51 'The Three Mesquiteers' westerns produced by Republic between 1936 & 1943. A man from the inn-keeper's past is there to settle a score and could the arrival of a bank robber be mere coincidence? Charles FLASH GORDON CONQUERS THE UNIVERSE Middleton plays the comic relief detective snooping for the more obvious clues left by supporting castmates Glenn ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET FRANKENSTEIN Strange & Robert BLONDIE BRINGING UP A BABY Middlemass. Fred THE MAD MONSTER Myton prepped the script for prolific director Sam WHITE PONGO Newfield. B&W.
The Car: Road to Revenge (2019)
A Thumbnail Review of THE CAR 2: ROAD TO REVENGE
I watched THE CAR recently as a double feature with this throw away sequel and marvelled at the differences between the two. THE CAR 2: ROAD TO REVENGE is unquestionable the more technichally sophisticated movie. The screen writers (Matt SHARKTOPUS VS WHALEWOLF Yamashita, Michael WEREWOLF: THE BEAST AMONG US Tabb and writer/director G. J. DEATH RACE 2050 Echternkamp) have densely woven a script which borrows as liberally from MAD MAX & CHRISTINE as the cultish 1977 B-movie hit and still manages to come up short by comparrison. Part of the problem is the smallish budget and the other is Echternkamp. During scenes intended to generate laughter the director manages polite smiles and your eyes will never open wide looking as the special effects or stuntwork. Grant Bowler; star of TV's DEFIANCE plays a hard nosed detective in a BLADE RUNNER-esque futureworld where gangs of cyborgs in THE ROAD WARRIOR, A CLOCKWORK ORANGE and ROBOCOP terrorize law abiding citizens. An insane bio-engineer (Martin THE ENFIELD HAUNTING Hancock) and the mechanical steampunk terrorists he created sign their own death warrents when they murder a D. A. (Lee BATTLESTAR GALACTICA Bamber). The lawyer's evil soul transmigrates into the state-of-the-art, automotive body of his sports car. The D. A.'s ex (Kathleen SURVIVAL OF THE DEAD Monroe) also begins looking like roadkill when she becomes love interest of the cop investigating this brutal nonsense. There's enogh cash and talent to keep this Universal sequel's backlot boat afloat but the minimal competence you're paying to see makes scant entertainment. THE CAR 2: ROAD TO REVENGE comes to life only briefly when Ronnie Cox appears in a different role than who he was in THE CAR. It's a nice touch that'll earn an extra star from this badly aging geek but unless you were alive 4 decades ago the scene with the mechanic and his unique car parts will hold no meaning. Tolerable mostly and vaguely dissappointing. The studio data dumped this discount bin worthy disc with the only extra feature of being able to turn subtitles off. Collectors will be disgusted!
The Car (1977)
A Thumbnail Review of THE CAR
I fell in love a little with this nifty horror movie when after reading the poster's tag-line; "Is it a phantom, a demon or The Devil himself?". James THE AMITYVILLE HORROR Brolin starred as the sheriff of a dusty town investigating a string of hit-&-runs involving a Lincoln Continental with opaque windows in this fondly remembered pic which will remind genre buffs of KILLDOZER, DUEL or maybe even JAWS. The gimmick here is that THE CAR is driven by a supernatural force unable to set wheel on hallowed ground. Kathleen INCIDENT ON A DARK STREET Kennedy is just fine as the sheriffs' plucky girlfriend who probably later regrets cursing THE CAR to Hell when it tries to parallel park on her face. John Marley who worked with director Elliott Silverstein before on the 1965 western CAT BALLOU appears as a deputy trying to save the desert community who are helpless against the killing machine. Some low-end but excitingly staged stuntwork and pyrotechnics help sell the concept. Based on an improbable and slightly silly script by Robert MURDER BY PHONE Butler and Dennis REVENGE ON A HIGHWAY Shryack. THE CAR is listed as one of the 100 Most Enjoyable Bad Movies Ever Made by Razzie founder John Wilson. Followed 42 years later by the instantly forgettable sequel; THE CAR 2: THE ROAD TO REVENGE.