Photos
Quotes
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To-Bel : [to her husband] A few months ago, your buddy Howard, here, did some exploration of certain dark parts of my continent.
Howard : I don't know what you're talking about. I never met this woman before in my life.
To-Bel : The fuck you didn't! Dr. Doolittle, here, went so deep into areas unexplored by your feeble playwrightin' ass, that I got to thinkin' he was Lewis *and* Clark.
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Frank : I knew a girl that looked just like you.
To-Bel : Really?
Frank : I wrote a poem about her. Do you want to hear it? Hey, Chocolate Mama, She's got a stomach like a Hershey snare drum, She's got an ass like a nasty heart, Beating on the other side, Like a dark globe of every place a man could want to go.
To-Bel : Oh, how you talk.
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Dr. Van Kamp : I respect Peter Hepburn. I respect his vision. I respect his courage to continue to do the kind of work he knows will never bring him the big money.
To-Bel : But, eh, but, we live so well? He spends *and* he knows Shirley MacLaine.
Dr. Van Kamp : The money's just the last scraps of a niggardly inheritance. His mother was a suspicious woman. She left them what I call a 'distrust' fund.
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To-Bel : I *love* what you've done with your home.
Clare Lipkin : Oh, well, my late husband liked the idea of an English manor, trapped inside an Italian villa, and me trapped right along with it.
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To-Bel : I really think that we should check into a hotel.
Peter : No, no. I - I want to be here for my sister and I don't want to insult her friend. Hey, everything gonna be fine. Okay? You know, we'll go shopping, we'll come home...
To-Bel : I don't like parties for dead people.
Peter : We'll sneak upstairs, we'll fool around. How long has it been? Four hours?
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Lisabeth Hepburn-Saravian : Why are you telling me this?
To-Bel : Shall I be honest?
Lisabeth Hepburn-Saravian : Please.
To-Bel : Just the mood I was in.
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To-Bel : It happens to everybody, Willie.
Willie Saravian : I feel awful.
To-Bel : Shit, that always the measure of a man. With what you face, you mo' man than most I been with.
Willie Saravian : Really?
To-Bel : Why, sure. Lots of boys get nervous the first time. And - if its any consolation to you, you're a whole lot better equipped than your Daddy. So, why don't you go on and get some sleep.
Willie Saravian : To-Bel, you're the best Aunt a boy could have.
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Lisabeth Hepburn-Saravian : You screwed Juan?
To-Bel : The other one, eh, what's his name? Um, Frank. It was so degrading. I felt like some fabulous farm animal.
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To-Bel : You humiliated me! Here I am, prime time, and you fukin' the rerun!
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To-Bel : What goes around comes around. Now, you get outta my goddamn way. I'm goin' to get me some Louis Vuitton.